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One of the most annoying trends established over the last decade or two is how some studios will opt to adapt a publishing manga/novel partially. We've seen this happen with shows like Black Butler, Fruits Basket, and Attack on Titan, but they're the lucky ones in this regard. Their source material sells quite well, so there's always going to be a vested interest in making a continuation or indeed, a full-on reboot. Some shows, unfortunately, aren't so lucky. There's a whole host of shows that got one 13-episode season before fading away into obscurity because the BD sales were poor. For every Black Butler or ... Attack on Titan continuation, there's a Deadman Wonderland or No Game No Life condemned to a life of obscurity. It doesn't matter if these shows are accessible outside of Japan either, because the executives who run these studios only care about their bottom line. But what happens if a studio goes bankrupt before establishing a bottom line of any sort? My friends, today we're going to be talking about the tragedy of Karneval and by extension, the inevitable collapse of Manglobe.

Karneval is a show about a thief named Gareki and a mysterious boy named Nai. Both of them got roped into an organisation called Circus that investigates and exorcises creatures called Varuga; superhuman abominations that feed upon complex organisms like humans. These creatures are the result of experimentation by an organisation called Kafuka, whose goal is to spearhead human evolution. That's as best a summary as I can come up with, given how little the show tells us. Karneval as a show has so many ideas, concepts, and plot points that it wants to introduce. Unfortunately, that short season doesn't allow for these things to be fully fleshed out. Considering how the manga is approaching the 140-chapter mark at the time of writing, this only spells out a complete recipe for disaster. Then again, that's probably not an entirely fair assessment to make. The show itself does try to elucidate us on its inner workings; Manglobe did succeed in some regard, but they didn't quite hit a home run, so-to-speak.

Had this show been a proper 24-episode season, I'm sure we would've had more shown to us. Unfortunately, that's not the finished product that aired on TV. Instead, we have a foundation for a story to be built upon rather than a narrative proper. That sad fact's reflected in the ending as it implied more is yet to come. Considering how it's been a little over seven years since Karneval ended and how Manglobe went bankrupt in 2015, it's unlikely we'll ever get more. Enough bellyaching about its flaws though, because there's still merit found in what we have. While the story's atrophied in terms of depth and detail, Manglobe provided us with sufficient context for the premise. If a prospective viewer intends to watch this show purely for entertainment without analysis, they wouldn't have much trouble doing so. We never find out much about the backstories of Circus agents like Yogi and Tsukumo, but there's plenty of context surrounding Gareki and Nai to provide some rudimentary picture of their origins. What's more, the bits of the story elucidated to the audience provided a framework for later events to follow during the show's run.

Speaking of which, the Circus agents we're introduced to might not have much in the way of backstory. Even so, that still doesn't stop them from having fleshed out personalities, motivations, and investments. We know that the stress of the job presumably takes its toll on Yogi; that's why he's so dedicated to making the people around him smile. We never learn anything about Tsukumo's past, but her sensibilities on the battlefield and her compassionate demeanour make her a crucial ally. We know even less about the First Ship agents and their dynamics, but mutual respect and rivalry between both teams are readily apparent. Perhaps I may be looking too deep for merit, but these are details are so insignificant that other studios opt to neglect them entirely. The fact that Manglobe went through the trouble to even flesh them out, even partially, shows that there was someone on the writing staff who cared about it.

On the subject of the premise, it's admittedly cliche on some level. However, I'd argue that it's different enough to make this show unique. Unlike other animes like Bleach, D.Gray-man, and Black Butler, Karneval's not quite a supernatural series. The Varuga are indeed superhuman, and their deaths throughout the show come across as if they're exorcisms. However, they're explicitly monstrous aberrations of humanity and not some paranormal force. Their transformation can happen one of two ways: contact with tainted blood or through the use of drugs that spark these changes. Circus agents can fly, have superhuman powers of their own, and can conjure weapons whenever they please. However, these powers come from a treatment which alters their cellular makeup. Karneval may look like some flashy supernatural action flick, but it's far closer to sci-fi than anything else. Think SOLDIER from Final Fantasy VII instead of the Black Order from D.Gray-man.

Moving away from the story and characters (or lack thereof), let's talk about the superficial aspects of this show. Before going bankrupt, Manglobe was renowned for giving each anime they worked on a distinctive look. These were the guys who created shows like Samurai Champloo and Ergo Proxy, after all. Karneval is no exception, as the general aesthetic of the show blends elements of both shonen and shojo anime. That fact isn't too surprising though when you find out that Karneval is a josei manga. Gareki looks like any edgy shonen protagonist, but some of the other characters have those distinctive shojo manga eyes with the gangly proportions to boot. This fact is most apparent with Nai, as he looks like Kaworu Nagisa if he were the uke this time around.

As for the designs of the Varuga, they're all quite varied in appearance and capability. From what I've seen during the show's run, some Varuga can hide their monstrous form while being able to pass for normal humans. Those monstrous forms aren't necessarily the stuff of nightmares, but their transformations can spook a viewer who isn't ready for it. At least, that's what I try to tell myself because that first Varuga in the pilot episode scared the hell out of me when she started transforming. Subsequent transformations didn't catch me off guard, but first impressions tend to stick with you. I certainly can't fault Karneval for having original monster designs.

The animation quality throughout the show is spectacular, but that's no surprise given Manglobe's reputation. Action scenes are fluid and enthralling to watch, especially by the show's end. Manglobe also spared no expense the stupider antics involving the gag comedy or the festival performances. Sometimes the jokes fell flat on me, but they were still lovely to look at regardless. While my formerly keen eye for animation errors has admittedly diminished, I couldn't personally make out any glaring animation errors throughout the show's run. I wouldn't necessarily call this show Manglobe's best from a stylistic or animation standpoint, but it's still quite a cut above average.

The audio side of things is also quite lovely. The opening track, "Henai no Rondo" by GRANRODEO is a bombastic J-Rock track that quickly sets the tone for events to follow. It's fast-paced, it's upbeat, it's incredibly energetic, and it's such a joy to listen to at the start of every episode. Similarly, "Reason" by Kamiyu is quite a catchy and fun ending track. I generally don't like ED tracks that clash with the heavy tone that some episodes end on but Karneval's storytelling is atrophied in terms of depth and detail anyway, so it's not like anything of value was ever lost.

I'm quite late to the party as far as the dubbing "controversy" is concerned, but I can't say I had any problem with it. I'd even argue that the dub is pretty fucking good. Greg Ayres typically plays the 'loveable goofball' character, so I can understand why some people would take umbrage with him voicing Gareki in the first place. Even so, Ayres does quite an excellent job at conveying Gareki's sarcastic and taciturn demeanour. The rest of the cast does a fantastic job too, my favourite performances being Sean Michael Tongue as Nai and Ian Sinclair as Hirato. Sean Michael Tongue does a beautiful job conveying Nai's boundless optimism and confusion at the circumstances surrounding him. Similarly, Ian Sinclair perfectly captures Hirato's nature as a stern yet compassionate commander with a bit of a jovial streak. It honestly is a great dub, and I still find myself confused at all the people who think it's shit.

Would I say that I enjoyed watching Karneval? The answer to that question is a resounding "yes," and I'm not ashamed to admit that in the slightest. I'd even go so far as to recommend that you watch it, were it not for the fact that this is sadly a glorified trailer for the manga. Unfortunately, the entertainment value I got from watching Karneval isn't enough to override my critical faculties. Karneval is an unfinished product when push comes to shove; I honestly found myself craving a greater sense of resolution than what we ultimately received. With that said, the anime certainly left a positive impression on me that does give me an impetus to check out what the manga has to offer. Of course, other people might not be as forgiving, so your mileage will undoubtedly vary.

Lastly, I want to take a moment to reflect upon Manglobe as a studio and what they brought to the table. My introduction to Manglobe's works was obviously through Samurai Champloo, as it was for hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of other people. I certainly had my gripes with it, but it was a fun, stylistic show with a fantastic soundtrack and dub that I still adore to this day. With this in mind, I feel like Manglobe might have shot themselves in the foot with such a strong debut. Their subsequent shows never quite managed to achieve the same level of success that Champloo did, so I'd wager that they relied heavily on short seasons to offset any potential losses that their shows might bring to the table.

Unfortunately, those short seasons never managed to produce anything of substance that would keep the company afloat. Everything in their repertoire after releasing Champloo consists of either failed experiments like Ergo Proxy (a show that I do like but consider far too obtuse for its own good) or unfinished adaptations like Deadman Wonderland and Karneval. The only adaptation they committed to was "The World God Only Knows," and that's not necessarily a series that would appeal to a mainstream audience. Their final show was Gangsta, and while I've never watched it, a cursory glance at reviews posted on websites like MAL or Hummingbird reveals that it suffers from many of the same problems that plagued Deadman Wonderland and Karneval. It's quite a shame too given how Manglobe always had an eye for creating stylistic shows that manage to leave some impact on the minds of their viewers.

Karneval might not be Manglobe's best work, nor would I consider it to be a definitive "must watch," but it's still a fun show that brings some unique ideas to the table with lacking, yet serviceable execution. If you're perfectly comfortable with watching this show knowing that it's a glorified manga trailer, you'll enjoy the hell out of it. If you're curious about what the manga is like, you'll get a good idea of what the manga's like and then find out whether or not you want to read it. If you're looking for a show that's a paragon of quality, look elsewhere. Either way, let's hope that Twin Engine and Geno Studio have better luck than Manglobe did.

Black Butler II turned ten years old two weeks ago, which is quite surreal to think about considering how recent it feels. There's a rather peculiar phenomenon that happens in popular culture with time. It would seem that stuff that was popular ten years ago tends to age poorly, and yet 20 years later, we laud it as a retro classic. Given that, we must ask ourselves whether or not history will vindicate Black Butler II. Indeed, it wasn't the most critically acclaimed at the time of its release, and yet there was this rather notable subset of the fandom that tried to find the ... good in an extremely controversial second season. Even so, some would argue that this show's transgressions are so unforgivable that what little good this season accomplished would never be enough to justify all the nonsense viewers have to endure. I am one of those people.

My initial impressions of Black Butler II were not positive when I first watched it. Even if I try my damndest to forgive the show for its many transgressions, I can't find myself feeling anything except visceral disgust. Do not be fooled; there is no merit to be found here in Black Butler II. What little good that it manages to accomplish boils down to mere coincidence and aesthetics rather than any sincere attempt at telling a coherent story involving characters who have compelling narratives. I'd even go so far as to say that this show is the perfect example of a "cash grab sequel" considering how much shit the viewer has to wade through before finding anything remotely close to what the first season had to offer.

That's something I'd never imagine myself saying, much less in a long-form review. Though the 2008 anime is flawed to high heaven, I can at least respect the fact that it tried to branch out into newer concepts. While its ending wasn't satisfying for me, it felt like an airtight conclusion to the Faustian tragedy about a victim of circumstance and his pursuit for revenge. It's common knowledge by now that the 2008 anime ended with Sebastian about to devour Ciel's soul, how the fuck can anyone make a sequel to that? Unfortunately, I can't go into too much detail about that due to spoilers, but I will say this: the explanation feels like it was ripped straight from the depths of some shitty headcanon on Tumblr or FanFiction.net than Yana Toboso's mind.

While it was challenging to try and find anything about this show's marketing, the general assumption that one could make at the time its pilot aired was that this show would be about a new young master and a new demon butler. Of course, we all know that setup was a fake-out as the real story this season has to offer is a battle between old and new. The new young master Alois and his demonic servant in Claude are now locked in a struggle with Ciel and Sebastian as we watch this marvellous chess game unfold in real-time. At least, that's the best way that I can try to describe this sad facsimile of a plot positively.

The thing is that Black Butler II tries to set itself up as this grand battle of wits between eerily similar nobles where we can see just how far Ciel could have fallen were it not for the way his circumstances played out. It doesn't achieve that effect whatsoever and instead plays out more like a sadistic child psychopath bitching about why everyone hates him. Ciel wasn't the epitome of characterisation in the 2008 anime. However, it was still relatively easy to root for him considering how Ciel still had his moments of humanity shown (i.e. his affection for Lizzie, his acceptance of Soma and Agni, his bond with the servants of Phantomhive, etc.).

I want to give Alois the benefit of the doubt because I get no joy out of hating him. However, I cannot tolerate his presence on the screen for more than mere minutes at a time and no amount of great voice acting from the likes of Her Highness, Luci Christian can ever change that. Alois is quite literally Ciel if he had no redeeming qualities whatsoever and any attempt this show makes to paint Alois in a sympathetic light falls flat on its face when you take his actions during the anime into account. How the fuck can I feel any modicum of sympathy for a child who gouges out his maid's eye for a simple mistake?

What's more, is that the anime tries so… fucking… HARD to make the audience feel sympathy for Alois to the point where it just comes across as fucking stupid rather than compelling. I don't give a shit how tragic your character's backstory is; sympathy is earned rather than given. Ciel's actions in the anime and manga are indeed morally questionable at times. Again - he's still got those crucial moments where you can look past his Bruce Wayne facade and see a child who's ultimately a victim of circumstance. You want me to see the light in Alois? How about you portray him as something other than a sadistic, psychotic child with the telltale signs of histrionic personality disorder in the present day and present time?

I don't give a rat's ass if Alois was abused and defiled like Ciel nor do I give a shit about his background as some impoverished child; shitty people, in general, don't deserve our sympathy. Alois's entire motive boils down to an obsession with what Ciel has that he doesn't have. Indeed, this feud between Ciel and Alois gets even more ridiculous when Claude decides to take an interest in Ciel after tasting his blood. Get this: Alois is such an irksome shitstain that his demonic servant who is contractually obligated to serve him leaves for the superior protagonist. That's how you know you're an utter failure as a person.

There is an argument that I've seen some people make that Alois was an excellent villain specifically because he got you to hate him and in a vacuum, I can understand that logic. The problem with this train of thought is that merely hating a villain doesn't automatically make them compelling. Wrestling heels evoke the ire of the audience on purpose, but there's a clear distinction between a heel like Randy Orton and a heel like X-Pac. Hell, I'd wager that Alois isn't even in the same league as X-Pac. He's more like Roman Reigns in that the larger audience hates him and yet A-1 Pictures decides to pull a Vince McMahon and continue pushing Alois despite the sheer volume of disapproval.

What makes all of this even more disgusting is how far A-1 Pictures tries to go with its pandering. I stated before that I'm grateful for Yana Toboso deciding against making Black Butler into a BL manga. Now, we get into the part of this review that goes into great lengths about why. The fan service in Black Butler was uncomfortable, but it never got downright nauseating like its cash-grab sequel does. Hell, put the two shows side by side, and you can make an argument that the first season was tasteful with how it handled its fan service. Again, that's a statement I never thought I'd say out loud, but here we are.

Alois's backstory involves him getting exploited sexually by the former Earl Trancy. If you think that's bad enough, we get treated to several flashback scenes where we see Alois seducing him in excruciating detail right down to the ugly bastard sucking his toes. We get treated to countless views of Sebastian pandering to Grell's lust for him by striking poses while she takes photos of him beating up the bishonen triplets. Speaking of which, we get treated to many scenes of these mute triplets who exist for two reasons: padding out Alois's servant lineup and also fan service for all the fujoshis who couldn't get enough BL material from the first season. You know, because why bother telling a compelling story when you can amp up the number of pretty boys in your narrative and have the fujoshis buy the BDs in droves? Don't think they're the only ones who get in on all the pandering either, because Hannah exists specifically to cater to perverts who lust after a one-eyed maid with huge tits.

It gets to a point where Claude is the only character introduced that I can find myself rooting for in some manner. Why? Because he reacts precisely in the way that I would if I got beckoned by a child psychopath. I'd just put in the bare minimum necessary to get the kid to shut up and ditch him when I get the first chance. Ordinarily, I'd take umbrage with Claude's lack of charm or charisma. However, that would imply that all demons in the Black Butler universe are exactly like Sebastian. Is it that much of a stretch to assume that demons can have different personalities and aesthetics? Plus, Jason Douglas does a fantastic job voicing him, so I can't find myself being too hard on him.

What baffled me when I was watching this was how I saw so many comments on KissAnime deriding Claude for not caring about Alois, but I feel like we're missing out on one crucial detail here: Claude is an expletive demon! His only vested interest is in Alois's soul, not Alois himself. That's also the reason why Sebastian went through so much trouble to reclaim Ciel after Claude kidnaps him! This utterly stupid fandom seems to forget that demons view humans as food and nothing more. Sebastian and Claude didn't fight for Ciel's love; they were effectively fighting over who gets the last slice of pizza! The only reason why Sebastian ever act in a remotely paternal manner to Ciel in the first place was due to Sebastian's dedication to the butler aesthetic. Claude had no such commitment to any aesthetic, so it makes sense that he'd act in a vein similar to other demons.

I've seen other reviews of this show saying that they liked how it cut back on the gag comedy that plagued the first season. What's more, those same reviews praised this season for being darker and taking risks that the first season didn't. Like I said in my analysis of the first season: it's pretty fucking dangerous to romanticise risk-taking. Why? Because it leads to people accepting abject rubbish as genuine quality when all it's doing is being edgy for edginess's sake without any care for storytelling or characterisation. To be fair here, it's not like the manga was devoid of edge, but there's an obvious distinction to be made here.

Whenever we get a look back at Ciel's time with the cult shortly after Vincent and Rachel Phantomhive get murdered, the manga treats these moments with absolute seriousness. Sebastian even says that Ciel was calling out for help "in sorrow, in anger, in despair, and terror" and that "he spits out curses that fall like flames from his tongue." We don't see Sebastian as a knight in shining armour rescuing his uke like so many awful drawings on DeviantART, Tumblr, and Pixiv make him out to be. Instead, we get a picture of a predator masking his prey drive with a Faustian contract. Sebastian does save Ciel from the cult, but not without reminding him that his soul is forfeit when the time comes. If Ciel ever has a traumatic flashback to the cult, Sebastian comforts him just enough to bring him back to sanity (or he'll opt to scare him out of it in the recent chapters). It's not because of any vested interest in Ciel beyond the contract. It never was, and it never will be.

If Black Butler II were to recreate this type of scene, it would instead feature Alois crying out for Claude never to abandon him while he's wearing boa, hot pants, and no shirt. Oh and don't forget to throw in some flashbacks of Alois's hilariously oppressive past to garner more sympathy and some shots of Hannah staring at him wistfully while the triplets stand there doing nothing. If it still seems a little too sterile for you, why not throw in some shots of the old Earl Trancy and his harem of underage boys along with Alois's quest to usurp the Earl? That'll surely make the audience root for Alois. You might think I'm exaggerating here, but that's literally how all of these "dark" moments play out in the context of the show.

Moving away from all that ranting about the story and Alois's numerous transgressions, let's talk about the other characters. While Ciel and Sebastian make a return in this season, their involvement in this season feels forced beyond all belief. All our beloved Bassy wants to do is eat his dinner in peace, but A-1 Pictures couldn't even afford him that luxury. Still, there was a part of me that was happy to hear Brina Palencia say "This is an order!" only for J. Michael Tatum to follow it up by saying "Yes, my lord." Given that, I guess that's one positive point in this show's favour.

Unfortunately, that positive is immediately followed up by another negative in that the remainder of the returning cast has absolutely no purpose whatsoever. Lau even makes a return despite visibly dying toward the end of the first season, so it's not like A-1 Pictures even cared about consistency. Perhaps most insulting is how Fred Abberline now has a twin brother... who looks and behaves precisely as Fred does in the manga, right down to the moustache. Mind you, Episode 20 of the first season explicitly stated that Fred lost his entire family when he was young. Where was the twin all this time? Directly from some coked-up executive's anus, perhaps. I think the best part about the twin is that he completely undermines Fred sacrificing his life to save Ciel from impending danger. Thank you, A-1 Pictures for completely ruining one of the few poignant scenes from the first season. We don't need compelling narratives involving characters we care about; we want more BL fan service! But, I digress because I've been blathering far too long about this. Let's take a look at some of the more superficial aspects of this show. Maybe then, I won't have so much venom to spare.

Due to the shorter season, there was a much higher animation budget which pays off quite well this time around. There's much more action in this season which admittedly is a refreshing change of pace considering how slow the first season was. Even more surprising is how fluid these action scenes are. It was quite a marvellous sight to witness Sebastian throwing tableware at random goons in the first season, but now we get full-on brawls between Sebastian and Claude.

Still, there are quite a few inconsistencies with the animation that isn't as apparent in the first season. The CG horse carriages returned, as did the CG teapots. What's more, they've come back in droves. Let's play a drinking game: take a shot every time you see some conspicuous CG in the show. The first one to die of cirrhosis won't have to suffer for the rest of the show's run. Thankfully, that's the worst I have to say about the animation. There aren't any instances of the animators going off-model that I could make out while watching the show, so that's a plus.

Unfortunately, the audio has taken somewhat of a downgrade from the first season. There is no iconic song like "Si Deus Me Relinquit" from the first season in Black Butler II. The only iconic track from the OST in this season is the OP, ironically enough. "Shiver" by the Gazette is a decent song. It does pop up in my head every so often, but it's not the type of song I'd actively seek. Still, upbeat J-Rock songs are always okay in my book. The dubbing this time around is also much more tolerable, though that could be due to the lack of exaggerated Cockney accents from the likes of the Phantomhive servants. I just wish that Funimation didn't waste Her Highness, Luci Christian's talents on such an awful character, but that's a comparatively minor gripe in the scheme of things.

Now we get to my favourite part of this review: enjoyment. It should be apparent that I fucking hated watching this show. Even when I first watched it back in 2014, I didn't care too much for it. However, I wasn't quite able to vocalise how I felt because my thoughts were far too abstract for me to piece together. Coming back to Black Butler II six years later has given me the capacity to precisely vocalise the sheer contempt that I feel toward this failed abortion of a cash-grab sequel. Unfortunately, this came at the cost of my entertainment. To date, this is the only A-1 Pictures show I've ever watched that I didn't enjoy in any capacity whatsoever. Not even in that ironic "so bad it's good" way.

So many people say that this season had potential. Do not be fooled; there was never any potential to be had with this awful show. Its very premise relies on breaking an airtight conclusion from the previous season. Even worse, it amplifies all the worst aspects of the first season from the fan service to the sheer volume of uncomfortable BL subtext between Alois and Claude or Ciel and Sebastian. Hell, there are even some moments where A-1 Pictures tries to shoehorn some subtext between Ciel and Alois too. The only way Black Butler II could've ever been good is if A-1 Pictures decided to adapt the Circus arc of the manga. We didn't even get that for a good four years after this travesty aired.

The whole time I was watching this, I couldn't help but ask myself one question: "why am I not watching Black Butler: Book of Circus?" In so many ways, that is the superior sequel. I'm not even trying to be a manga purist at this rate. I'm all for a show deviating from its source material if the creators of the programme are willing to put in the effort to develop their stories and characters. However, A-1 Pictures had no intention whatsoever of giving us any of that. This show isn't an attempt at genuine quality; this is the finished product that we receive when coked-up executives try to cater to the lowest common denominator. That's pretty fucking insulting when you consider just how rich and deep the manga's lore is.

While all of this drama was going on in the world of the anime, the manga was flourishing. Do you want to see Sebastian challenged in his duties as the Earl of Phantomhive's butler? You don't have to watch this season to witness Sebastian struggle. We get treated to countless moments where Sebastian isn't so peerless after all. He didn't even know how to treat Ciel's asthma when he had an attack during the Circus arc. Sebastian's superhuman endurance also gets pushed to its limits during the Luxury Liner arc as he tries to protect the young master from danger approaching him at all sides. All of this was happening during the time that Black Butler II was airing. Imagine being one of the poor sods who watched this season and came out of it pissed, instead of being one of the people who had the luxury of enjoying a proper story from start to finish.

Should you watch this show? Absolutely fucking not. Even if you're sceptical of my praise to the manga, there are still other shows in this particular genre that are worth watching. Pandora Hearts started airing the year before Black Butler II came out and while I do have my grievances with the series as a whole, it's a far more satisfying experience from start to finish than Black Butler II is. Alternatively, you can turn to Karneval and get a similarly brief show that makes some modicum of sense. In a landscape where shows of genuine quality exist, there is no reason whatsoever as to why you should give this season a chance.

Finally, I have a little message I want to give to this incredibly bizarre fandom that I begrudgingly associate with due to my love of the series as a whole. If you thoroughly enjoyed Black Butler II, if you liked Alois, Claude, Hannah, or any of the other characters that this show introduced, or what have you: that is 100% okay. However, you should do us all a favour and not conflate your sense of enjoyment with actual quality. While it is true that anime is an art form, there is a baseline for what does and doesn't work within the context of a particular show. Black Butler II has so many holes in its writing that it plugs with fan service to the point where people have gone out of their way to write fan fiction, not to mention the full-on roleplays on websites like Tumblr. I can't even begin to fathom why anyone would even bother with that. It's not the duty of us as fans to fix the mistakes that the writers made. Your headcanon won't change the fact that this show sucked so hard that you had to resort to making headcanons in the first place. Similarly, you may be able to roleplay as Hannah or Alois without making either character insufferable; even so, that won't change the fact that their characterisations were so mind-numbingly awful in the show itself.

Black Butler II is a blight upon the franchise and isn't worthy of the Phantomhive name whatsoever. Not even those admittedly hilarious bloopers or the OVAs can justify this abomination's existence. If you don't opt to heed my warnings, don't be surprised if you come out just as crestfallen as I am.

10 years ago, I was a freshman in high school. Looking back at that point in my life as an adult is quite surreal to say the least. My own memories of the time have become hazier with each passing day and yet looking back at old social media accounts that almost completely archived that entire experience brings back so many memories that are both vividly clear and horribly fractured. What's worse is that my memories of college, a time that was so recent in my life, is starting to become fractured and hazy too as I become more wrapped up in the humdrum of ... my own life. The ideals, the dreams, the goals that I once held so near and dear to my heart have long since been tossed aside for reasons I still try to justify to myself in the present day and present time.

When I was 19, I read Goodnight Punpun for the first time and I was completely taken aback by the sheer intensity of the work. As such, it still holds a huge place in my heart to this day. Reading it for the first time as an adult in his mid 20s however gave me a much deeper perspective of the manga that I'm not sure I ever wanted to have. The manga became much more intense because it cut much closer to home than I ever anticipated. By the time I finished reading it, I genuinely didn't know how to feel about it. Programmes like BoJack Horseman that I've watched since reading this manga for the first time have made me come to terms with the parts of myself that I never wanted to acknowledge. However, the show itself no matter how dark and brutal it got still had this hopeful (though indeed quite melancholy) undertone that still made it palatable to watch even in the thick of some of the show's most intense moments. Goodnight Punpun on the other hand was thoroughly bleak and unrelenting in its portrayal of the human mind's worst attributes. Though you wouldn't be able to tell that if you read its first volume.

The manga at its beginning starts off as a surreal and macabre slice-of-life comedy telling the story of a boy named Punpun Punyama along with some of his friends that we'll be following for the duration of the manga's runtime. At this point in his life, Punpun is still a child but he's old enough to process and internalise the trauma that he's been through at that point in time. Nevertheless, there's this oddly optimistic tone that this volume carries where Punpun is thinking about all the things he could become when he's an adult. A new student transfers to his class, a girl named Aiko Tanaka who has a similar disposition to Punpun: old enough to internalise trauma, but still hopeful for the future. In fact, there's one key difference between the two that fuels their dynamic - Punpun is passive but Aiko is assertive and unapologetic. It's this memory of Aiko that brands itself into the deepest parts of Punpun's mind for the rest of his life.

This point in the manga also highlights another struggle that Punpun faces for the rest of the story: cowardice. Many points in the manga show Punpun fall prey to circumstances that to an outside party, would seem to be out of his control. To Punpun however, he views himself as a coward for not speaking up or not defying the odds to make his dreams come true. When his mother was hospitalised on the day he tried to run away with Aiko to Kagoshima, he viewed himself as a coward for not being able to sneak away and be with the girl of his dreams. When he and Aiko reunite briefly in middle school during a badminton tournament and she tells him what she really wants in a boyfriend, he viewed himself as a coward for not being able to forsake everything in order to be with this girl who he loved for so long. When Sachi, the woman he had this on again/off again relationship with wanted a kiss before having sex, Punpun viewed himself as a coward for breaking down at that moment when he had a flashback to his first kiss with Aiko.

This recurring theme of cowardice haunts Punpun throughout middle school and high school and continues following him as he's an adult in his 20s. At this point in time, he's a bitter and self-loathing adult whose memories of someone he hasn't seen since childhood caused him to move to another city altogether in some vain hope of trying to find this manic pixie dream girl. If he couldn't find her, he'd just kill himself and let his memory fade away from the minds of others. Fortunately for him, he did have another chance encounter with Aiko as an adult. There's just one small problem though: this woman, who looks like Aiko, sounds like her, and feels like her does NOT match up with the Aiko Tanaka he knew personally all those years ago. She isn't Aiko, she's just another stupid, vapid slut who bears her resemblance.

Then it all comes to a head: Punpun has this clash of ideals where he realises just how far he fell from the goals and aspirations he set for himself when he was younger. Talking about shit he doesn't care about, going to trendy cafes that he has no interest in, laughing at jokes that aren't funny... this isn't Punpun nor is this Aiko. It doesn't take long for the walls to finally break as they both confide in each other about the miserable lives they've both been living up to that point. Taking comfort in each other's company and Punpun feeling the grasp of his cowardice slowly loosen, they resolve to finally run away to Kagoshima. There's just one final obstacle to overcome: Aiko's mother.

Then enters Chapter 113. MAL will most likely take this review down if I spoil what happens, but let's just say that it isn't pretty. With nothing left to lose, Punpun and Aiko finally set off with one another but now there's a new problem: this isn't the future he ever imagined having with her.

To paraphrase what Hiding in Public said in his review of the manga - if Punpun hated himself when he was a coward, he now absolutely despised himself when he was finally brave. That passivity that he engendered all throughout his childhood and adolescence was the barrier that kept him from truly facing the awful depths of his psyche along with what he was truly capable of and now he has to live with the consequences of his own actions. With Aiko by his side, they're now on the run like Matty Healy and Chelsea Schuchman in the music video for Robbers by The 1975. This fantasy of running away to Kagoshima is now a road movie, and their relationship further devolves.

Punpun finally had Aiko all to himself. He had finally forsaken everything to be with the woman that he loved so dearly, and still that wasn't enough to satisfy him. He became Aiko's personal daruma doll, sacrificing his own eye as a pledge of loyalty to her but that still wasn't enough. She was the only person that Punpun had left as he had always wanted, and despite wanting this fate from the very beginning, he felt selfish when he wanted more. Eventually, Punpun comes to the grave realisation that he may never truly see the stars as brightly as he once did with Aiko in his childhood during that Tanabata night so long ago. No matter how close he and Aiko can get physically and no matter how isolated they are from the rest of the world, he'll never be able to fully understand her from the top of her head to the tips of her toes with no miscommunication in between. Their minds and bodies decaying from the stress of their circumstances together would never allow that. The childhood fantasy turned road movie is ultimately shattered and Punpun is left devastated and more alone than he ever was before.

Musing on what life would've been like if the circumstances hadn't been what they turned out like, Punpun resolves to commit one final act of bravery that inevitably gets interrupted by Sachi - the woman he abandoned for Aiko. As punishment for his transgressions, Punpun now faces a fate much worse than death but one much more fulfilling: the chance of a new life - one where his sins are forgiven, but not forgotten. A peaceful life where he's of help and use to the people around him, but a it's a life where he won't ever fade away from the memories of his peers despite his wishes to the contrary. Sachi won't ever let him be a coward, but that doesn't mean she'll let him be brave either. The manga ends where it began: with another transfer student introducing herself to the class and another boy taken in by this newcomer. The cycle continues, but maybe this time, the outcome will be different.

There genuinely is so much more that I could talk about as far as the manga is concerned, but I couldn't possibly fit all of the minutiae I wanted to touch upon. To be absolutely clear: there's WAY more this manga has to offer than Punpun and Aiko's fucked up relationship, but that relationship itself is the centrepiece for Punpun's entire character arc. I can't lie when I say that I saw myself a bit too closely in Punpun, especially when it came down to Punpun and Aiko's dynamic. I'm not gonna pretend like my life was a 1:1 copy of Punpun's because that's obviously false, but still - self-loathing because of perceived cowardice, obsessing over past relationships and ultimately becoming disillusioned with the reality of the situations at hand, it's pretty hard to ignore.

This entire manga told from the perspective of a boy, following his life's journey through adolescence and early adulthood was ultimately one of the most harrowing coming-of-age stories ever written. At some points in the manga's run, it felt more like torture porn than anything else but make no mistake, ceaseless angst and pessimsim aren't the only thing this manga has to offer. Even in its most depraved, cynical, and bleakest moments, there are still little glimmers of light that shine through. Uncle Yuichi even says it himself - happiness is ephemeral, so you better enjoy it while it lasts.

When I first read this manga five years ago, it left me shocked and ultimately hopeless. This time around, I still feel the same way but finishing BoJack Horseman before rereading Punpun didn't leave me anywhere near as hopeless as I felt back then. With all of that said, I leave you with BoJack and Diane's final words: life's a bitch and then you die, but sometimes life's a bitch and you keep on living.

Anyway, that's all for now. Feedback's always welcome and with that, I'm out. Peace.

***

Before I go, I wanna give a shoutout to Hiding in Public. Your videos on Goodnight Punpun really did give me the impetus to reread it and actually get my thoughts out on pen and paper. If you haven't watched his videos, I'll link em below. Be warned, for there are spoilers abound:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewfEOUxUd0g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQ2M8sQElXM

Also check out Under the Scope's video as well
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZV32-MlqF0Q

Also, go watch BoJack Horseman if you haven't already! Some standout clips come to mind
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1_EBSlnDlU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36uJtc1CV0k
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDdmBKP2uvk

On a sleepless night in late 2004 just a week before my 9th birthday, I was watching the usual rotation of shows on [adult swim] - Futurama, followed by Family Guy and then if I was still awake, I'd be watching whatever anime came next. There was the usual rotation of InuYasha, Bebop, and whatever else was on at the time. Of course that night, I came across a show that I still hold near and dear to my heart as an adult - the original Fullmetal Alchemist TV series.

As a child (especially a sleep-deprived one), I never really understood most of the show but ... I still enjoyed what I watched because it was enthralling in its own way. As a teenager in high school who was starting to get a taste for drama, that's when I really started to enjoy the show as I started to understand WHY Ed and Al were so desperate to get their bodies back. As an adult in his 20s (and still sleep-deprived as always), my adoration of Fullmetal Alchemist is multifold - I adore the show because of its own merits and also because on some level, Fullmetal Alchemist takes me back to a simpler time.

When I sit down and I think about Fullmetal Alchemist, I think back to a time when I legitimately got joy out of watching anime instead of just either grimacing in disgust or just sitting there with a blank expression. I think back to all those nights I couldn't sleep and I just sat down watching shows like InuYasha and Fullmetal Alchemist in the dark of my room with a glass of milk and a peanut butter sandwich. I think back to what it was that drew me to this show and by extension, the medium itself. I could write whole theses on the subject, but I'm sure you get the point by now.

I suppose this is the part of the review where I have to provide an "objective" assessment on why I love the show so dearly. To be sure, Fullmetal Alchemist as a programme definitely does a LOT of things right that so many other shows (especially nowadays) get wrong. From a narrative standpoint, the show's own internal logic (i.e. the setting, the mechanics of alchemy, and so on) remain concise and clear without much in the way of contradiction (for the most part). The story itself advances from point A to point B without ever feeling like certain elements were ever forced. A large reason as to why this is the case is because the show was never intended to be a faithful recreation of the manga, so it was possible to take creative liberties from the get-go.

Some of the creative liberties taken had even managed to make intense scenes from the manga even more mortifying in their own ways. Nina Tucker for example, was a minor character in the manga that had a large impact on the story in all incarnations of Fullmetal Alchemist. However, the manga opted to portray her as just a random girl who fell prey to unfortunate circumstances and her fate was what sparked the Elrics to overcome their personal weakness. She certainly was referenced multiple times throughout the course of the story, but the way she was referenced always came across as "Hey, remember Nina? We need to avenge her. Anyway, back to the story."

In the 2003 series however, Shou Tucker took in the Elrics to help Ed prepare for the state alchemist exams and as a result, the brothers spent a whole year with Nina. In the process, she became a surrogate sister to them. They laughed together, played together, cried together and so on. Given this, when she fell victim to the same fate that befell her in the manga, the sheer horror and trauma from that whole incident stays with the Elrics for the entirety of their journey. Small changes like that wound up adding so much more gravity to an already intense scene. For that, I applaud the folks over at Bones for taking such liberties.

With this in mind, there are missteps taken by the creative team. Around the halfway mark, the show completely deviates from the manga and goes its own way. Mind you, this wasn't completely out of left field as manga-exclusive characters were introduced very early on and they slowly gained more prominence with time. What's more is that there was a LOT of thought put into most of the anime-exclusive lore to say the least. Possibilities that were touched upon in the manga are actually explored here, and most of the time, the anime does hit the mark and then some. Let's take a look at Lior, the first town that the Elrics visit.

Lior in the manga was always depicted as an idyllic desert town that found new life when Father Cornello worked his miracles. When Cornello was revealed to be a fraud, the town simply moved on without him and all was well with the world. In the 2003 series however, Cornello was revealed to be the glue that held Lior together because he brought prosperity to an otherwise poor town. When he's revealed to be a fraud, a rift emerges between the townspeople who want to move on from Cornello and the following that Cornello built up. Civil war breaks out, and then the Amestrian military gets involved to try and quell the conflict but they make things WAY worse. Certainly a rather haunting parallel to the civil wars that broke out because of power vacuums in this day and age, don't you think?

Where the anime's lore fell flat was toward the last 5-6 episodes. At this stage, we learned a LOT of stuff. We learned about the true nature of the Philosopher's Stone, the origins of the Homunculi, who their master is, what Hohenheim's past was, and so on. All of this lore was expanded upon over the course of 14-15 episodes between Episode 28 when the manga splits up and episode 44 when Hohenheim is brought back into the fold. My point is that Bones took their time telling us all of this stuff so that it didn't come off as an asspull. All of that careful attention that Bones put into the storytelling for that long kind of goes to waste when the last few episodes basically assault us with development after development after development without any time to let it sink in.

The climax of the show was undoubtedly intense in its final episodes, however the impact is lessened when so much just keeps happening at once. The actual ending, of the show as it were, leaves a lot of plot threads open that don't get resolved until Fullmetal Alchemist: The Conqueror of Shamballah (and the less we talk about that movie, the better). Now, I'm not one to specificaly crave resolution in EVERY ending but there is a LOT to be desired when a plot thread is introduced in one episode, and then that thread is left open when the show ends 2-3 episodes later.

Would a longer runtime have helped the show end more gracefully? It's honestly hard to say. My initial thought many years ago was "yes" but now, I'm not 100% certain. Yes, Bones did manage to craft some of the most engaging anime-exclusive lore I've ever come across. However, it could've been possible that the writers were running out of steam and they just wanted to end the show before it became painfully convoluted. Some may argue that it did become painfully convoluted toward the end, but I'd beg to differ. Even in the show's final episodes when so much was thrown at you at once, there was still /some/ semblance of logic to be found and some forethought put into what was introduced. Twas simply a shame that the show ended right when it was getting so intense.

Now with all of that ranting taken care of regarding the storytelling, you might think that Bones put in the same level of effort into making sure that the characters were equally good and on some level, you'd be right. What's more is that the anime expanded upon many other characters that the anime simply didn't. The Homunculi, for example, were always treated as simply villains who were but a means to an end in the manga. However, the Homunculi here are much more than villains. Due to their origin stories in the anime, the Homunculi are now artificial beings that crave humanity.

Some of the secondary characters also get this type of treatment. Roy Mustang, everyone's favourite character in the manga was always portrayed as a man of duty and honour who simply did what he had to do during the Ishbalan civil war. In the 2003 series however, he still maintained that same composure until confronted with a ghost from his past. Early on, it was hinted that he had shades of PTSD and much later on, we learn about his history in the civil war. He, like all state alchemists, were simply there to silence the rebellion by any means necessary. However, a combination of witnessing some of his comrades revel in the bloodshed AND orders that he had to follow that weighed heavily on his conscience almost led to him committing suicide. It wasn't until he made a pact with Hughes to endure and try to change the system from the inside out when he finally found new resolve and became the sarcastic pyromaniac we all know and love today. Expanding upon backstories like that honestly just made the experience that much more intense, so it's little wonder why I found myself rooting for him even more.

In regard to how our protagonists are handled, their characterisations remain largely consistent. Ed starts off the manga as a headstrong teenager with a Napoleon complex who wants to make amends for the sins of his past. What's more is that the events of the show slowly begin to take a toll on his overall demeanour. When he is first introduced to us, he was certainly not a plucky character given what happened to him in the past. Still, there were ideals he held onto and traces of optimism he had. Those ideals and that optimism slowly get stomped down upon as time goes on and he endures more gruesome hardship. This isn't to say that he becomes a full-on angsty Sasuke wannabe, but there is a marked change in how Ed handles himself at Episode 1 compared to Episode 51.

Al on the other hand, as endearing as I found him, simply served no other purpose than to be Ed's morality pet. This isn't to say that Al isn't a good character because he definitely did have a few story arcs that were great. However, from start to finish, Al just remains static in terms of characterisation. He's a 10-year-old boy whose soul is bound to a suit of armour. Yeah, he craves human warmth but at least he has that book of things he'll eat once he gets his body back. Yeah, he questioned his humanity every so often but Ed's always there to slap the back of his tin can to remind him that they're brothers. Any sort of arc he'd have that focused directly on him just ended with Al realising that there's nothing "wrong" with him and all was well with the world. Besides, how could he focus on himself when he's too busy trying to reel Ed in from trying to kick Roy's ass? In fairness, this was a problem the manga had as well but when the series went all out with Roy and the Homunculi, I'd expect the same for Al.

Moving away from all that ranting about the story and the characters, let's talk about the artwork, animation, and sound. From an artwork standpoint, Fullmetal Alchemist holds up amazingly well especially when you realise that this show is almost 15 years old. The characters all look like real people and NOT androgynous mutants like in most animes nowadays. The background artwork is always amazingly well-designed, and the anime-exclusive bits are even more amazing (my favourites being the Underground City and the Gate of Truth). The colour palette the show opts to use is much more muted compared to Brotherhood, however I feel that fits the bleaker nature of the 2003 series. Animation-wise, the show doesn't disappoint either. Due to the age, there are a lot more still frames and talking frames than one might be accustomed to but conversely, the show is more drama-heavy to begin with so that is forgivable. Action scenes are done well with little in the way of hiccups and are sufficiently enthralling, though I would warn you to stay away from the show if you're looking for a full-on bloodbath.

Sound-wise is where I feel the show absolutely thrives, as Fullmetal Alchemist to this day, has my all-time favourite dub and my all-time favourite OST of any anime ever. This isn't without good reason, as the folks over at Bones really pulled out all the stops. One of the defining tracks of the 2003 series is a little song called "Bratja" which manages to perfectly encapsulate the tragedies that Ed and Al went through along with their guilt, shame, and their resolve to push foward. Another memorable track is "Dante," which goes on to be remixed into four other tracks that manage to all transform the scenes that they're played in. This track, and its variants are exclusive to the latter half of the show but from a simple piano piece with soft vocalisations to a bombastic orchestra that manages to enhance the drama of a shocking scene, this is a track that's utilised well.

OP/ED wise though, this is where the show begins to lose me. In the American airing of the TV series, only two OP tracks were used and they're both my favourite. The first one is a bombastic alternative rock song called "Ready Steady Go!" and the second (and the final one) is "Rewrite" by Asian Kung-Fun Generation. However, the remaining OP tracks quite frankly suck. They hit the ears wrong and even when they hit full swing, they don't quite fit the atmosphere of the show. I mean yeah, Ready Steady Go and Rewrite don't necessarily fit either, but at the bare minimum, they both start off on a note that doesn't make me want to stick a screwdriver through my eardrums.

The EDs are more or less forgettable, but honestly that's not something that I'm too torn up about because I always rushed to the next episode anyway. The ED track I'd have to say I loved most would be ED3 - Motherland by Crystal Kay. I love the song itself, and on its own, the ending itself doesn't really clash with any intensity found at the end of the episodes it's played in. At the same time though, I do take umbrage with how this ED is basically played over fan service of Winry. I mean... for the love of God, couldn't they just play this song over some artwork of Scar's brother and Lust? Or alternatively, Hohenheim and Trisha? It's a missed opportunity, but I do thank Bones for introducing me to Crystal Kay in the first place.

And now we get to the part I've been dreading writing the most - the analysis of the dub. Honestly, the only reason why I'm apprehensive to talk about it in the first place is because of the absolute state of madness that Funimation is in right now, combined with the controversies surrounding Vic Mignogna. Still, for all of my visceral disgust built up toward Funimation in 2019, there is no denying that this was by all accounts, their magnum opus in terms of dubbing (although you can also make an argument for Yu Yu Hakusho or Fruits Basket too). Say what you will about VIc, but in 2004-2006, he was undoubtedly among the elite of anime dubs alongside the giants like Steve Blum, Dan Green, and Crispin Freeman. Everything sounds so natural from the emotion to the intensity and even the sarcasm and humour. If you were a stranger to anime in 2004 and you started watching Fullmetal Alchemist, you'd be quick to assume that this was a Western show. THAT'S how good it was. Also of particular mention, Aaron Dismuke, the voice actor for Alphonse was literally 12 years old during the production of the dub and despite any preconceptions you may have of child voice actors, he hit the mark and then some to voicing Al. It really is disheartening to see how far Funimation fell from their halycon days, because this dub shows a lot of care that they just don't even bother putting into their shit nowadays.

Fullmetal Alchemist to me was so much more than a show, it was an experience from start to finish. It's disheartening to think that the original series is most likely going to be doomed to a life of obscurity, especially now that Aniplex of America is the licensor and they seem hellbent on promoting Brotherhood. Still, it's a show that I absolutely adored from start to finish and it's certainly a programme that I would heartily recommend to anyone. Now if you're a newcomer to the series, you may be wondering whether or not you should skip this show, watch Brotherhood first, or what have you. I'd honestly say watch this show first and then give Brotherhood a shot. The reason why? If you start with the 2003 series and move to Brotherhood, it's easier to enjoy, especially considering how Brotherhood was formatted in such a way to facilitate that type of viewing to begin with. If you start with Brotherhood and move back ,it may get tedious. Still, that's just my $0.02 on the matter.

Anyway, that's all for now. Feedback is always welcome and with that, I'm out. Peace :)

***

Also, PLEASE don't let Funimation fuck up the dub for the Fruits Basket reboot and PLEASE let Laura Bailey and Jerry Jewell still be normal people...

Dragon Ball is the quintessential shonen tale about a weird kid and his exploits in the equally weird world surrounding him. It has a little bit of everything in it - a quirky and likeable cast of characters, fun action scenes, comedy that's funny 90% of the time, and plenty of moments thrown in here and there that can leave you shocked, in tears, or feeling all mushy inside because it's legitimately heartwarming.

No review of Dragon Ball is complete without mentioning its infinitely more famous sequel in DBZ, and this certainly remains true here. With that said, I'd like to establish that this is as ... far as I'm willing to discuss Z. For starters, Dragon Ball is significantly different in terms of tone and atmosphere as compared to Z. More to the point though, the differences between the two shows are so stark that they'd warrant separate reviews as opposed to simply doing compare/contrasts. For the purposes of this review, I'm treating Dragon Ball as a completely separate entity to Z. With that said, let's get started.

Our story starts off with an orphaned child living on his own in the mountains as his life gets changed dramatically when he meets a teenage girl named Bulma. From that point forward, Dragon Ball becomes a story about an odd 12-year-old kid with a good heart and his adventures in a surreal world that he was otherwise oblivious to because of all the years he spent living away from society. As such, there really isn't any overarching goal that Goku has as he's more or less just trying to enjoy all the new experiences he has whilst kicking ass whenever he needs to.

A critical aspect of Dragon Ball is martial arts and for the most part, the focus is pretty consistent. Energy attacks are seldom used and powerups are few and far between. For Goku, martial arts is a sport that he wants to continuously get better because there's always gonna be a bigger foe for him to take down later on down the line. More to the point though, Goku fights not just to protect his loved ones and the world around him but also because martial arts is a sport that he thoroughly enjoys. The same can be said for characters like Krillin, Yamcha, Tien, et al and why they continue to train as well.

It's this approach to the subject of martial arts that makes Dragon Ball an anomaly in the world of battle shonens. The ultimate goal of every training/tournament arc is obviously to beat the opponent and win the match, but they wouldn't be entering the world martial arts tournament every 5 years if they didn't enjoy fighting. Master Roshi, Goku's first teacher, even goes on to say that he wants Goku and Krillin to continuously keep training like the wild animals they are because their passion for the sport is that great.

Another critical aspect of Dragon Ball is its own namesake - the seven dragon balls and the Eternal Dragon that it summons, Shenron. I won't make any bones about it, the dragon balls themselves are nothing more than plot devices turned plot convenience. More to the point though, most arcs that centre around gathering all seven of them are fairly predictable to say the least. Even so, that doesn't necessarily mean that those arcs aren't enjoyable. Some of the funniest and most iconic scenes from the series (i.e. Bulma accidentally flashing Master Roshi for the 3-star ball, Goku turning into a giant ape for the first time, Piccolo killing Shenron, etc) have come from these arcs. Even so, that doesn't change the fact that you can still see the ending of a ball hunt arc coming from a mile away.

The characters in Dragon Ball remain largely consistent in terms of characterisation: Goku is a slovenly moron with a big appetite and a love of fighting. Bulma is high strung and always has to have her way, Master Roshi is a wise martial arts master whose skills are eclipsed only by his insatiable lust for younger women, you get the idea. Even so, it's not like all of these characters are one-note archetypes meant to get children to point at the screen and laugh. From the very beginning to the final episode, almost every major character changes significantly. Goku started off as a total moron who had to pat the crotches of everyone he met just to see if they were a man or a woman. By the end of the series, he's an accomplished martial artist who actually has a couple of brain cells to spare every so often.

It isn't just Goku who experiences that type of growth over the course of all 153 episodes. Krillin started off his debut appearance as a coward with the outward appearance of someone who's confident in his skills. By the time he left the first martial arts tournament, he developed a newfound confidence in his own skills as a martial artist. That's only over the course of one arc, and the growth just keeps on going from there. Yamcha enters the series as a desert bandit with a crippling fear of women his own age but not only does he get over that fear, he too becomes a powerful martial artist. You get where I'm going with this.

From an art/animation standpoint, Dragon Ball is very much a product of the mid-to-late 80s. Various frames and stills are reused throughout the course of the programme, as are speed lines, repeated cutaways to strong attacks to emphasise its power, etc. There were also plenty of scenes drawn and animated off-model to go around as well. Even so, the animation does clean up quite well for major action sequences. Dragon Ball is at its best from an aesthetic standpoint during an intense action sequence. To get a good idea of what I'm talking about, look at the full fight between Goku and Jackie Chun in the first world martial arts tournament. Speed lines and repeated frames mar an otherwise fast-paced and intense brawl between a stern martial arts master and a young prodigy. Even so, the final stages of the fight where Goku and Jackie resort to using plain old martial arts instead of energy attacks and dirty tricks is nothing short of intense and even though the fight has a foregone conclusion, it's still something that manages to put me on the edge of my seat. That wouldn't be possible if it looked like shit, after all.

From an audio perspective, Dragon Ball is quite honestly one of my all-time favourites in regard to stuff like the OST, the dubbing, and so on. This programme came out around the time that Funimation was actually making English renditions of the Japanese OP/ED, and it's such a shame that they stopped doing so after like what, 2008? Some of the line translations don't hit the ears right, but even so, the fact that they took the time to write an English rendition showed that there was a time when they cared deeply about the shows that they licensed. The dubbing itself is also quite the treat, but it's one of those things you'd really have to listen to in order to truly appreciate. Just watch out for Puar's voice, otherwise you'll be wanting to do cocaine off a vertical mirror like I do whenever I hear it.

On the whole, Dragon Ball is a largely good programme. It has its ups, its downs, but there's a reason why the manga and anime went on to influence an entire generation of shonen programmes. It's honestly a shame that Dragon Ball on its own has more or less been thrown to the wayside as Toei opts to continue focusing its attention on Z/Super. I would've honestly loved to see a Kai version of Dragon Ball with cleaner animation, no filler, and even better dubbing. Even so, what we have here is a programme that has actually managed to age somewhat decently and should be watched by all. Anyway, that's all for now. Feedback is always welcome and with that, I'm out. Peace.

Adolescence, in no uncertain terms, fucking sucks. This is especially the case if you're introverted as fuck and don't get along well with others for whatever reason. Though the memories of my own adolescence are starting to get hazy, I do remember quite well just how much trouble I had interacting with others my age. Sometimes, I really just wanted nothing more than to just stand around with the guys from my class and actually be a part of the conversations they were having. Of course, social rejection and isolation ends up giving way to a LOT of nasty emotions and thoughts. I can't even ... begin to tell you how many times I thought some shit along the lines of "they're all retards anyway, why do I need their approval?" and kept acting in such a manner that reinforced my loneliness. Keep in mind that I'm not even scratching the surface here, as there's a wide gamut of emotions and experiences that colour an introvert's way of thinking.

Given this, it's no surprise that I have a pretty big soft spot for works revolving around introverted protagonists. Some of my all-time favourite works (i.e. Oyasumi Punpun, Fruits Basket, Persepolis, Daria, Evangelion, etc) have all revolved around introverted protagonists and their experiences adjusting to an environment that challenges their very perceptions of the world around them. However, there's always a nuance to be had with this type of thing. Far too often, we have various works portraying introversion as an obstacle to be overcome rather than a general desire to focus on and receive gratification from your own interests rather than the interests of others. I can't even begin to tell you just how fucking sick I am of seeing movies, TV shows, anime, manga, and God knows whatever else treating introversion as inherently bad and then ending with the protagonist finally being accepted by their peers as one of the group.

So considering all of this, it shouldn't be any surprise that I fucking hate Onani Master Kurosawa as it embodies all the things that I've come to hate about works revolving around introverted protagonists. However, that alone really isn't enough to evoke my visceral disgust. You see, Onani Master Kurosawa brings in the subject of sexual harassment into its storytelling and without it, the manga would've just remained a run-of-the-mill coming-of-age story where an introverted protagonist finds acceptance among peers that never actually hated him. When you factor in this element to the storytelling, you'll find that the manga also tells us that we should be willing to forgive extreme sexual harassment because we're all ultimately capable of changing in the end.

Now, my visceral disgust toward this manga is heavily coloured by my own experiences when I was still in the school system so your mileage may vary. However, I can safely say that I've bore witness to all sorts of sexual harassment in high school: snapping exposed bra straps, groping, unwanted hugs, lifting up another person's shirt/skirt, the list goes on and on. It's a sad reality to say that shit like that either ends up getting overlooked because it wasn't reported or that the punishments for such things more or less amount to a revolving-door suspension system which does nothing to keep the problem from happening in the future. However... I'm pretty fucking sure that literally masturbating on the clothes of girls would warrant a full-blown investigation from the local police department along with criminal damages. If not that, it would warrant angry parents threatening lawsuits at the school board at the absolute bare minimum.

None of this actually happens in Onani Master Kurosawa. In fact, Kurosawa walks away with a happy ending where he actually gets together (or at least is implied to be getting together) with the first of his victims! Now, if you're seriously wondering why that's a bad thing... well let's keep in mind that for the whole manga's run, Kurosawa has done nothing truly deserving of our sympathy. This is a guy who literally beats his meat to vivid fantasies he has of /RAPING/ his female classmates in an unused girls bathroom. Even when you ignore that, Kurosawa is an archetypal edgelord who thinks he's too good for the people around him. What redeeming qualities could this man possibly have? Yes, he's unnerved by the bullying that Kitahara experiences. However, his idea of "justice" isn't sticking up for her and actually trying to befriend her. Instead, his idea of "justice" is literally ejaculating on the clothes of those who bullied her. I'm pretty sure we all know this by now but two wrongs definitely don't make a right. More to the point, he keeps doing so without any twinge of remorse (going so far as to nut over the property of some girl who ends up curving him, no less).

Now as far as him getting together with his first victim goes, I personally don't have much room to speak considering how I've never been a victim of sexual harassment or assault in my life. HOWEVER... I'm fairly certain that the subject of a victim getting involved in a romantic relationship with their past abuser is something we'd all find pretty fucking distasteful to say the least. Now, is it impossible for such a thing to happen in reality? Technically no, but there'd have to be some SERIOUS character development that needs to go down before the groundwork for such a thing can even happen. That's character development which the manga's incredibly short length of 31 chapters does not allow.

If you're seriously thinking about giving this manga a shot, do yourself a favour and don't. If you wanna read a manga about a pervert who gets blackmailed by a female weirdo, do yourself a favour and read Aku no Hana instead. Kurosawa may have come out well before, but that doesn't change the fact that Aku no Hana is far superior in every conceivable way. Granted, it's not a perfect manga by any stretch of the imagination but I'm sure that we'd find Kasuga getting blackmailed and abused by Nakamura due to his one moment of indiscretion more satisfying than Kurosawa simply walking away scot-free (oh boo-hoo, he gets bullied once he confesses publicly. That still ain't SHIT compared to having your criminal record stained).

I'm sure that I wouldn't hate this manga anywhere near as much if we weren't supposed to be rooting for Kurosawa. If he was an unrepentant villain protagonist and the manga was about a budding psychopath's experiences in school. But no, this is a manga that's about a teenage introvert with the telltale signs of ASPD who ends up committing SERIOUS sexual harassment and manages to walk away without so much as a criminal proceeding and he still manages to be accepted by his peers and STILL manages to get the girl in the end. All of that shit combined is more than enough to cement this manga in my mind as one of the biggest abortions I've ever had the displeasure of sitting through.

To quote Kyle Kallgren from Brows Held High: this manga was not made, it was committed. You cannot read this, you can only inflict it upon yourself.

Anyway, that's all for now. Feedback is always welcome and with that, I'm out. Peace :)

As someone who was bullied and abused quite a bit during his formative years, I generally don't care to think of my past tormentors as human beings. When you're going through the thick of it all, they don't really seem like people as much as they come off as monsters. Of course, one of life's painful truths is that people are capable of changing for better or worse. There have been countless times in my adult life where I'm confronted with my past tormentors and I had to accept the reality that they weren't the same person they were back then. Some of them actually ... realised the errors of their ways, others had karma bite them square in the ass and they took a lesson in humility, and others still were victims of peer pressure who felt some twinge of remorse after the fact. So you know what? I don't really have /too/ many hangups over reading a story told from the perspective of the bully.

Come to think of it, that actually would be a refreshing change of pace considering how most works told from the perspective of the bullied basically come across as edgelord revenge fantasies set to the tune of late 90s/early 2000s nu metal (I'm looking at you, Onani Master Kurosawa!). However, I'm not so quick to simply jump in and hope for the best. There's a certain nuance to this type of thing which basically allows it to either be a great work about how there's good inside us all and it allows for all of us to redeem ourselves irrespective of our pasts OR being a work that justifies toxic behaviour because of how the abuser had some sort of past trauma. This doesn't even factor in whether or not the work takes into account things like laws, policies, etc because that in and of itself adds a crucial dimension to such conflicts that a lot of works just tend to overlook.

Thankfully, Koe no Katachi is very much in the former category and for the most part, it does handle the nuance quite well. With that said, it does get rather painful to read at some points. I suppose this stems from the very premise itself. For all intents and purposes, Shoko should /NOT/ have been enrolled in a general education school in the first place. Her deafness warrants specialised education that allows her to not only learn school subjects, but to also function in the real world. Granted, this is discussed later on in the manga's run and she /does/ transfer to a school for the deaf once the bullying became too much for her to handle. Still though, shame on the school administrators for even saying "yes" in the first place even though their teachers weren't properly trained to educate deaf students.

On that note, I suppose this does come down to a case of values dissonance as well. I did my time in the NYC public school system, which has a specialised school district (District 75) for students with learning disabilities, sensory impairments, autism, etc. Given this, seeing a deaf girl being placed in a general ed classroom without so much as a paraprofessional to help her understand what's going on comes across as fucking weird to me. For all I know, maybe the general mindset in Japan is to send students with disabilities into specialised schools outright rather than having inclusive schools with specialised programmes like we have here in NYC. But I digress, so let's take a look at what Koe no Katachi gets right.

Our protagonist is Shoya Ishida and for all intents and purposes, he starts off the manga as a complete and total jackass. At this point in his life, all he's concerned with is finding a way to amuse himself and boy does he get a LOT of mileage out of abusing Shoko. To him, she's not a human being so much as she is a deaf alien from planet Nishimiya (sorry Cryptic-senpai, I'm stealing your analogy). His favourite game at that point in time was finding new ways to abuse Shoko from throwing her hearing aids out the window to shouting in her ears among all sorts of other things. Of course, he wasn't the only participant in this game. Most of Shoko's classmates at that point in time got some sort of mileage out of bullying her. Oh yes, if there's one thing that this manga gets right, it's the sheer sadism that children are capable of.

That all changes when the school principal threatens police action once Shoko's fifth pair of hearing aids goes missing. Her classmates needed a patsy, and so they picked Shoya to take the fall for their collective abuse of Shoko. Now subject to similar abuse that Shoko endured, he must learn to take responsibility for his actions. Eventually, he becomes a loner who isolated himself from everyone around him for one reason or another. One day during his senior year in high school, he has a chance encounter with Shoko and that's when his metamorphosis occurs. No longer a bully turned loner, this fateful meeting sets the wheel turning for Shoya to start developing compassion and empathy for his fellow human being.

From a storytelling standpoint, the manga did a damn good job at showing off Shoya's change of heart along with every step of his progression in character. I just love how he doesn't magically earn the forgiveness of everyone he wronged. He actually had to work to make amends and more to the point, his growth isn't just something that gets stepped on just because he was a little shit. He actually does make new friends and he does fairly well for himself as time goes on.

As a character, Shoya is definitely the most well-written of the bunch. His desire to make up for all the trouble that he caused his mother and Shoko once she comes back into the picture is honestly one of the most wholesome things I've read in a long time. Make no mistake, his past actions are condemned to hell and back and he certainly built up a good deal of self-loathing over what a delinquent little shit he used to be. Still though, I gotta give the guy props for owning up to his mistakes and actually trying to make amends. His redemption arc is so masterfully done to the point where it almost rivals that of Zuko's from Avatar: The Last Airbender.

In regard to Shoko and how she's handled, it’s important to keep in mind that this story is being told from Shoya’s perspective and he’s an unreliable narrator. Also not helping matters any is how Shoko herself doesn’t speak and Shoya doesn’t always tell us exactly what she signed so we tend to only get one half of the conversation. At the same time though, Shoko is quite expressive and so we’re able to understand on some level what she’s feeling. With that said, I really wish that we got some clearer insight into what her thoughts were.

Yes, it’s easy to look at her facial expressions and know that she’s jovial, that she’s sad, that she’s irritated, etc but at the same time, what precisely is it that’s going on in her head? We do get some insight into what she thinks at times, because there were points in the manga where she texts Shoya, that someone says exactly what she signed, etc but at the same time those moments were so few and far between. It would’ve been nice if we saw a group chat or something between Shoko, Shoya, and their other friends over the course of the manga but it’s sadly a missed opportunity.
The other characters as far as the manga is concerned are handled well enough, I suppose. Nagatsuka in terms of appearance reminds me quite a bit of Bling Bling Boy from Johnny Test, but thankfully he’s nowhere near as annoying. In fact, he’s actually one of the more endearing characters throughout the manga’s run. He’s the first person who witnesses Shoya not as an ex-bully, but as a person trying to improve his lot in life. As such, he sticks by Shoya through thick and thin and is responsible for a good deal of the manga’s more heartwarming moments.

Yuzuru was a character that I was irked by in the beginning, but she turned into one of my favourite characters by the end of the manga’s run. Yuzuru acted largely as Shoko’s protector and provided her with a good deal of empathy that was sadly lacking throughout most of Shoko’s childhood. Yuzuru not only gives us insight as to what Shoko’s home life is like, but she also ends up growing as the manga moves along.

Then of course, we have Ueno… and honestly, I really didn’t care /too/ much for her. She’s one of the many people who bullied Shoko when she was in middle school and was also among those who decided to blame Shoya for everything that happened to her. And yet, she somehow still has feelings for the dude and despite being a senior in high school, still wants to hold a bizarre grudge on Shoko? Granted, she’s far more tolerable than Kawai is because she’s actually self-aware to some extent and some of her more vitriolic tendencies get toned down as the manga progresses. In fact, she’s also responsible for some of the manga’s most poignant scenes so I can’t be /too/ upset at her. Still though, she’s more or less just a hate sink for me.

The last of the characters I’m willing to talk about are Shoya and Shoko’s mothers, and honestly… it took me a good amount of time to actually get used to Shoko’s mom. My big issue with her is that she still decided to enroll her daughter in a general education school rather than a school meant for deaf kids. Don’t get me wrong, she does have every right to be viscerally angry with Shoko’s bullies, but uh… she’s partly to blame for all this. Not helping matters any is how she’s unnecessarily stern with her deaf daughter. Don’t get me wrong, you have every right to be frustrated with your kids, but why scold them for using sign language every so often when that’s realistically their only way to communicate?

However, her reasons for being this way are actually explored on some level of depth as the manga goes on. I suppose the best way to explain without too much in the way of spoilers would be to paraphrase what Momiji from Fruits Basket said about raising a child that’s part of the Zodiac: if you have a deaf child (rather than a Zodiac spirit), would you abandon it because you can’t bear the thought of raising someone disabled? Or would you cling to your child for dear life, and try to keep them protected no matter what? Shoko’s lack of a father figure in her life shows that he decided to take the former route, erstwhile Shoko’s mother decided to take the latter and it did take a big toll on her psyche. Gradually, she becomes much more endearing as Shoko’s circle of friends expands and she goes on to be one of the manga’s most endearing characters.

Shoya’s mother on the other hand is an endearing person right off the bat who genuinely wants to see her son change for the better and understandably, gets frustrated whenever he does something stupid. She’s an unending beacon of love and support for her son, and we actually get to see the joy on her face when she finds out that Shoya is actually making friends again rather than just isolating himself from everyone else. My only real complaint is that we don’t get to see more of her, but then again, that’s par for the course in most shonen manga these days.

Moving away from all that talk about storytelling and characterisation, let’s focus on the superficial stuff. I absolutely adore the manga’s artwork. All the backgrounds are drawn well, and I absolutely love the artistic decision to put gigantic Xs over the people that Shoya doesn’t want to associate with because it further reinforces the isolation he put himself into. As far as the characters are drawn, I absolutely adore the fact that Shoko isn’t drawn like a typical KyoAni moeblob with the big sad puppy eyes that take up half her forehead. She’s cute, but she still looks like an actual person. The same thing can be said about all the characters, really.

The artwork so done so well to the point where its most iconic scenes (i.e. Shoya and Shoko meeting at the bridge where they feed the carp in the rain) can be used as actual wallpaper for your desktop. With that said, there were points where you can tell the mangaka phoned it in and didn’t put /as much/ effort into some panels, but that’s to be expected considering how this manga was publishing on a weekly basis. Plus, you only really notice them if you read the scanlations from when the manga first came out. The actual volumes have cleaned up the artwork quite a bit since then.

When I was reading this manga for the first time four years ago, it was an emotional rollercoaster ride for me. I grew so attached to Shoya and Shoko and I genuinely wanted to see the both of them move on from the hardships of their past. Every chapter at that point in time had me on the edge of my seat, and there were points where I was actually starting to get misty eyed and actually hesitated to load up the next chapter on Batoto.

As an adult now, I’d say that this manga still manages to get me fucked up but not anywhere to the same degree as it once did. I suppose part of this can be chalked up to the casuals that won’t shut the fuck up about how great the movie was but there’s more to it than that. Four years ago, I was still fresh out of high school and I didn’t have the hindsight as to how the schooling system worked because I never decided on becoming a teacher back then.

As someone who’s trying to become a teacher now, Koe no Katachi really does test my suspension of disbelief at some points with its portrayal of the educational system. Granted, I can’t be too harsh considering there’s things like values dissonance at work but it still manages to raise an eyebrow at many points. Even then, I would still say that the manga does a phenomenal job with its storytelling to the point where I can reluctantly look past the stuff it gets wrong.

Koe no Katachi ultimately did a great job of showing us that we’re all capable of changing for the better, and on a more personal level, it taught me that sometimes your past tormentors are capable of changing for the better. Even now as an adult, it taught me that some grudges are better left behind in the past. I’d hate to reuse a sentence from a past review, but I really can’t think of any other way to say it - Koe no Katachi was far more than just an emotional rollercoaster. In some ways, it was therapeutic and in other ways, it was a work that left a major impact on my way of thinking. For all those reasons and many, many more, Koe no Katachi definitely gets high marks from me. Maybe it won’t from you, but you wouldn’t know until you give it a shot.

Anyway, that’s all for now. Feedback is always welcome and with that, I’m out. Peace :)

I just wanna state that for the record, I have no problem with shojo smut in and of itself. Most of the time, it's analogous to shonen ecchi shit and isn't really offensive enough to be worth hating. With that said, there are aspects of shojo smut that REALLY piss me the fuck off (i.e. molestation being played for romance). Let's not forget that every so often, there comes a particular manga that just evokes all manner of visceral disgust out of me. Haou Airen is one such manga and to this day, I still maintain that it's the single most vile, reprehensible thing I've ... ever read for reasons that you'll soon find out. Enough waffling around, time to tear into this sack of horse shit.

Plot of the manga can be summed up like so: idiot girl brings complete stranger into house one day, gets abducted by him, and then develops Stockholm Syndrome after she finds out that her captor is a mob boss with a troubled childhood. In other news, this is an escapist fantasy about being whisked away from a boring life at home and then being thrust into an exciting new life full of danger, risks, and other such things with a tall, dark, and handsome man guiding you through all these new experiences (intimate or otherwise).

I personally don't care much for escapist fantasies, but I can at least see the appeal behind them. For a girl who feels bored/wrapped up with their lives, the very prospect of being whisked away into a strange new world is something that may very well be worth fantasising over. Also, that prince charming whisking you away to his fancy mansion bullshit is so 1950s. If there's one thing that the 1980s taught us, it's that an adrenaline high will override everyone's common sense. There's nothing like the thrill of being caught up in a gunfight when you're in the middle of having a nice dinner with your new man and then tending to his wounds after the battle is over, among other such things... cough. So on that front, I suppose Haou Airen isn't /that/ abhorrent. It's certainly a frustrating read for me since I'm a dude who doesn't fantasise about any of this crap, but it's nothing worth getting my boxers in a knot over... yet.

However, this manga had to do /something/ to evoke my visceral outrage. Around the half-way point of the manga, the sexual moments between Hakuron and Kurumi devolve from James Bond-style "50 nos and a yes mean yes, so shut the fuck up and start sucking my old man dick" scenes into full-on brutal rape scenes that drop all the pretense completely. From that point forward, physical/emotional abuse coupled with sexual abuse in varying forms become a frequent occurrence in the manga. So you may be wondering here "what's so bad about this? Maybe it's trying to deconstruct the escapist fantasy it set up in the first place?" to which I say "fuck you and your overanalytical bullshit."

Aside from the fact that I have a markedly low tolerance for sexual violence or abuse, this evokes my visceral disgust because of the fact that this went from a story about a girl putting up with a dangerous new lifestyle with a sexy edgelord by her side to a story about a girl who falls in love with her rapist who frequently abuses her physically/psychologically. There's no self-awareness, no psychological commentary, let alone any moral ambiguity whatsoever (not like that would've helped out much though...). So what is the implication here? Does Mayu Shinjo honestly believe that frequent brutal rape and abuse is justifiable if it's done by a hot guy with a troubled past? I honestly don't know.

Now, it's not like this manga was any good before the half-way point: there were contrivances up the wazoo and if you're like me, odds are that your social justice/feminist senses were going off non-stop because of the fact that this manga is about a girl IN HIGH SCHOOL who gets abducted and spends most of the manga's runtime being sexually dominated by a powerful and wealthy man who CLEARLY has trouble understanding the concept of "consent" (sexual violence not withstanding). Also, this is just a minor note but the characters were nothing more than standard shojo smut archetypes: dumbass girl MC, sexy edgelord douchebag with a troubled past, all the bitches that try to get in the MC's way for edgelord dick but end up losing, the edgelord's friends who try to mack on his chick, etc. You get where I'm going with this. It may not seem apparent at first, but this is a manga that somehow manages to be more abominable than some of the most infamous pieces of horror gornography that exist in this world.

Say what you will about how horrifying A Serbian Film was, but at least all of the sexual violence in the movie had a point! For starters, Milosh was an aging porn star who was looking for a way to continue supporting his family, and then he got ensnared by Vukmir's smooth talk about creating a final porno that would bring glory back to Serbia (only to find out that Vukmir was a demented madman). On top of that, Srdjan Spasojevic has gone on the record saying that the underlying message of the film was that as a Serb, you're fucked when you're born and it doesn't stop even after you die (as evidenced by the infamous "NEWBORN PORN" scene and the final scene where a two men were about to film another man who was gonna have sex with the results of family suicide). So yeah, while A Serbian Film has WAY more objectionable content in it, the entire film had ample amounts of forethought, subtext, commentary, moral ambiguity, etc: stuff that Haou Airen had none of whatsoever.

I think the worst part about this entire ordeal also comes down to all the people on Kissmanga who were blathering on and on about how "romantic" this entire piece of shit was. In between the already piss-poor writing and the mortifying depictions of sexual violence without any hint of self-awareness, the unironic praise this manga received was enough to REALLY cement its place in my book as the WORST thing I've ever read, by far.

I can only imagine the kind of irreparable damage this manga can do to a person who was or still is going through some kind of sexual torment at the hands of someone whom they have feelings for. This manga is repulsive, abhorrent, and virtually every single negative adjective out there. This manga was not made, it was committed. You cannot read it, you can only inflict it upon yourself. Anyway, that's all for now. Feedback's always welcome and with that, I'm out. Peace :)

I don't understand why it's so fucking hard to get an action show that's consistently entertaining. Of all the programmes I watched, Tokyo Ghoul is probably one of the few shows that actually made me feel like I was wasting my time watching it. "Oh, why didn't you drop it?" you might ask? Well for starters, I was actually following the programme as it was airing at the time (fun fact: I actually had the most upvoted preview at the time, but it got taken down because the show finished airing). But that isn't enough to truly explain why I so viscerally despise Tokyo Ghoul. ... Yeah, this show was beaten into the ground but I still got pent-up feelings of frustration that I need to vent.

I think the biggest reason as to why I fucking hate Tokyo Ghoul is because of how often it denied me my greatest pleasure as an anime viewer: intense action brimming with blood and broken bones. The first episode starts off with a ghoul feeding and then escaping, then it cuts to a REALLY nice opening sequence which then further sets the mood and I was just thinking to myself "aw yeah, this is gonna be awesome!" but then guess what happens? It cuts to some punk kid getting ready for his blind date and it isn't until half-way through the episode when we find out that his date was a ghoul. The ghoul tries to eat him, they get into an accident at some construction site, shit happens, and now the punk has the ghoul organs inside him. You know what that means, right? MORE BULLSHIT THAT GETS IN THE WAY OF THE ACTION!

A recurring theme of the show is Kaneki's struggle to accept his new ghoul status. He happens across a pair of benevolent ghouls who ease him through this transition but even so, Kaneki still wants to mope about. You see, I wouldn't really have such a problem with this but Kaneki isn't likeable in my book. This mostly stems for the fact that I've got a /VERY/ deep-seated resentment built-up toward Shinji Ikari clones and Kaneki certainly fits the bill and then some: he's a punk kid forcibly brought into a life-altering situation and now has to shoulder the burdens of this new life. It also helps that his female sidekick, Tohka has purple hair just like Misato and tries to get him settled in. Great...

On top of this, the whole reason why Kaneki's life got flipped, turned upside-down is mind-numbingly retarded when you think about what actually happened to him: the guy was on the verge of dying and he ends up getting the organs of his would-be murderer (who is also a ghoul) transplanted into him. So you mean to tell me that there is NO screening process to see whether or not someone is a ghoul, let alone whether or not an organ came from a human or a ghoul even though humans and ghouls have coexisted since time immemorial? Also, how is it that the ghoul's organs could've been transplanted into Kaneki so easily? Assuming that ghouls and humans have nearly identical physiologies (which is already a fucking asinine assumption to make because ghouls are man-eaters that can mutate at whim), how is it that the ghoul and Kaneki would have the same blood type or whatever it is that keeps a transplanted organ from getting rejected? The list of holes in the story get bigger and bigger, but I think I've made my point.

Now you may be thinking to yourself "oh, why overthink this show?" or "why do you have to bring real world logic into this?" Well guess what? This show is quite possibly the furthest thing from entertaining possible. I can tolerate the annoying main character and his bitching to some extent and I can let the gaps in logic slide provided that the show is entertaining enough to override my critical faculties. Unfortunately, this show just LOVES to deny me my fix of fast-paced action filled to the brim with all kinds of blood, guts, broken bones, and all that good shit! For almost 17 minutes of every 20 minute episode, we gotta put up with Kaneki's bitching, boring talking scenes involving the ghoul enforcement squad or whatever it's called, etc and then we get a few minutes of Kaneki tapping into the power of Ghoul ex Machina and then we see him using his magic ghoul powers to make pizza sauce and not much else. On top of that, the censorship was absolutely appalling when it was airing. The entire screen's colour palette would be inverted for 1-2 minutes at a time, and all that was being censored was just Kaneki stabbing the latest villain who's impossible to take seriously with his magic ghoul tentacles. Yeah, censorship's a non-issue now that the Blu-rays are out but that still doesn't erase what happened.

By the end of it all, there's a lot of shit that can be said about Ghoul and most of it sure as hell ain't gonna be pleasant from me. The only thing that's keeping this show from being so bad that it shouldn't even be mentioned in the same sentence that barrels are in is the fact that it's got some pretty colours and a nice OST to it. The only value that this abysmal excuse for a show has is snark bait. Now if you just so happen to unironically enjoy this programme, good on ya. You're able to do something I clearly can't do. Maybe the manga will be much better than this piece of crap but given the EXTREMELY sour taste that the anime left in my mouth, I can't really say that I'll give the manga a shot. Anyway, that's all for now. Feedback's welcome and all that guff, so I'm out. Peace :)

***

If someone has a mod for Reaper on the PC version of Overwatch that makes Reaper look like white-haired Kaneki with the mask, please send me a video of it.

This isn't Star Wars. George Lucas's franchise should NOT be renamed into anything else.

If any work of entertainment in our history deserves the title of 'Star Wars,' then it is the entirety of George Lucas's franchise and NOT this anime. Star Wars is more star wars than LOGH ever was, is, or will be. Constant spiels of exposition about various topics, a constant show of myopia in regards to its setting and subject matter, all the while consistently failing to act on the countless possibilities presented to us, this is 110 episodes of pure, unadulterated wasted potential in the most inexcusable ways possible.

In case you ... couldn't tell, I don't "like" Legend of the Galactic Heroes. This isn't to say that I don't think that it's an admirable programme, because there certainly is a lot to be admired about it. In terms of the sheer scope of the work, it's arguably the most ambitious anime ever made but at the same time, there are many things about LOGH that just rub me the wrong way. I cannot in good conscience call this show the best anime ever made, nor can I say that I would recommend it to anyone. My initial review of LOGH posted in September of 2014 was written from the perspective of someone who was expecting something grand and came out of the first season extremely underwhelmed. However, that review was poorly written and never levied any proper criticism toward the programme as a whole. Given how it's been a little over a year since then and how I've actually completed the show, I feel it's high time to tear into this programme and actually try explaining why I personally can't get on with it.

I suppose Legend of the Galactic Heroes manages to oust Star Wars in one way: the sheer depth and detail in regards to the protracted war going on between the Free Planets' Alliance and the Galactic Empire (no, not THAT empire). You're given information as to how the Empire was formed, why the Alliance formed, why the war happened, and all kinds of stuff like that. Of course, this is where LOGH's first biggest problem arises: it suffers from a rather nasty case of exposition overload to the point where we literally get treated to multiple episodes formatted as documentaries on fictional history with interviews from fictional historians. On the one hand, I suppose this is much better than having the first 4-5 episodes being nothing but scrolling text across a background of stars but on the other hand, I can't help but feel like they could've cut back somewhere along the way.

I would make a Star Wars comparison here because the original trilogy lacked such exposition, but I feel as if it's justified somewhat in LOGH's case because it was obviously wasn't trying to be an entertaining science fiction OVA series. In reality, LOGH presents itself as a political commentary on the human condition with a science fiction backdrop to it all. The true conflict at LOGH's core is the constant debate between whether or not democracy or autocracy is the superior form of governance and how each one affects the common man at the end of it all. When viewing this programme from THAT angle, the exposition overload makes much more sense because it gives us the proper context necessary to understand why these factions operate the way they do and prevents the entire conflict from devolving into a black-and-white battle between the forces of good and evil. Of course, this is where LOGH begins to lose me.

You see, LOGH manages to do a great job depicting the problems with representative democracy at large, especially in regards to how politicians become alienated from the people they're supposed to represent due to things like corruption, arrogance, and self-preservation among other such things. However, the programme itself has a HUGE bias toward autocracy. Don't get me wrong: the makers of this programme brought up some VERY good points about autocracy (i.e. the selfish nobility, a weak ruler/tyrant fucking up the nation, etc). However, there comes a point in the show where it basically tells you that an autocracy with a level-headed and just ruler is the best form of government. I don't know what the fuck Beatnik was on when he made his review of LOGH: My Conquest is the Sea of Stars, but this show actually DOES what Gundam does by painting out one side to be superior than the other and he should be arrested for false advertisement.

The whole conflict between the Free Planets' Alliance and the Galactic Empire basically had me rooting for the empire the entire time for a LOT of reasons. For starters, the empire had the more compelling of the two commanders. Reinhardt is no saint, but he's definitely the superior commander throughout the entire show. For starters, he actually has a compelling reason to even be in the military in the first place (cough cough Yang cough cough). I mean, wouldn't YOU try to do something if your own sister was the concubine of an elderly emperor? On top of that, the dynamic that exists between Reinhardt and his childhood friend Kircheis is also something that manages to keep me entertained. Whether it's Reinhardt and Kircheis snarking away at the stupidity that goes on around them or Kircheis bringing Reinhardt back to reality once he starts getting arrogant/reckless, there's always something there to really keep your eyes glued to the screen.

You know, now that I think about it... the first season of LOGH (in regards to Reinhardt and Kircheis's story, mind you) reminds me quite a bit of the Golden Age Arc from Berserk. In both, we have two men and their respective teams gaining notoriety from their military accomplishments whilst trying to evoke change within a failing monarchy and stick it to the nobles who feel threatened by the presence of "filthy commoners." Of course, Reinhardt and Kircheis never end up in an Eclipse of any kind so I'm quite thankful for that. Also, the show after the first season then follows Reinhardt's own struggles now that he's in a position of power along with the many interactions he has with the FPA. Now I know why I'm rooting for the empire: it's because Reinhardt himself is actually the most human character in the entire show! He's infinitely more human than Yang is, that's for sure.

I don't understand how ANYONE could possibly like Yang, but I found him to be the bane of my existence whilst watching the show. Yang Wenli is essentially the Kirito of the entire programme: he's unsympathetic, he goes about the entire programme with an irksome "I really don't want to be here but these idiots would die without me" attitude, and he wins virtually any encounter he's in, or at the very least manages to get a draw if Reinhardt or one of his trusted commanders enters the fray. On top of that, anyone who defies Yang or Julian (his ward/servant) is cursed to die or get humiliated, regardless of whatever reason they may have. The ONLY time I've ever gotten any joy whenever Yang was in the frame was during the episode where Yang got court-martialed and ended up roasting EVERYONE on the committee. At least then, Yang was expressing actual feelings that he had instead of just being a passive-aggressive douchebag like he always is. It actually got to a point where I was actually HAPPY when Episode 82 rolled around and he ended up playing less and less of a prominent role in the show because quite honestly, I fucking hated him THAT much. Now if only this show did the opposite with Kircheis because let's be honest with ourselves: LOGH is always better when Kircheis is here.

The rest of the cast in LOGH is fair enough to say the least. Some characters like Annerose, Julian, and Frederica are rather endearing and certainly help lighten up the otherwise tense atmosphere of the programme whilst other characters like Poplan and virtually ALL of the imperial nobles/alliance politicians evoked such visceral annoyance in me to the point where I kept begging for them to die a merciless and/or utterly humilating death (you know, like ____ does!). My favourite characters by far would have to be Kircheis and Oberstein. Kircheis serves as a wonderful foil to Reinhardt whilst still showing us that he's more than just the dude who wants to nail Annerose. On that note, Oberstein's ruthless efficiency immediately caught my attention and I couldn't help but cheer on any sort of plan he came up with, regardless of whether or not it went against Reinhardt's wishes. Also, his fake eye vaguely reminds me of Alastor Moody from Harry Potter so that was another point in his favour.

Of course, I'm losing the point of this review right now so let's go back to talking about why I can't get on with the show. We've already talked about why it loses me in regards to how it handles its political babble, but let's now talk about the blatant flaws in writing that the overzealous fans of this show just disregard because it apparently does everything else right. Now, I'm guilty of using this excuse a lot to justify flaws in the programmes I like and people have told me time and again that it's a shitty defense. You know what? I agree with that logic. So please explain to me why the countless people who've given this show 10/10 reviews and called it a masterpiece failed to address these blatantly glaring holes in the motherfucking writing?! Don't know what I mean? Well let's go over all the ways that the writers prove to us that they don't care about holes in their story.

For starters, let's talk about the inconsistent population figures. Now we learn that in the year 2050 AD, Earth gets torn asunder by a cataclysmic nuclear war that reduces the population from 20 billion (which is about 10.4 billion too much of the UN's projected population growth figures, mind you[1]) to 1 billion. Now the bulk of the refugees ended up colonising planets once Earth became a nuclear wasteland leaving only about 5 million people behind. Now, 200 years later, the population of Earth literally increased 1,000-fold! How the fuck could that happen when the population of the Earth at that point in time was more or less identical to the population of Europe during the Dark Ages, ESPECIALLY when the planet was reduced to a fucking nuclear wasteland?!

On top of that, 400,000 people who left the Empire to start their own democracy managed to increase their population exponentially to 400 million by the time of the first Alliance/Empire fight! Did ANYONE from the fucking writing team even consult a population expert or something before coming up with the figures used for these shows? It might seem like a really small detail, but shit like this leaves HUGE holes in the story when you actually try applying real-world data on population growth to a work like this.

Oh, and let's not forget how fucking STUPID the melee battles are. The spaceship stuff is fair enough... until you look at the battle tactics (but we'll get onto that in a second). However, the melee stuff always has to take place in full body armour with fucking metal weapons like swords, axes, and stuff! What the fuck is this?! Is this Artland/Kitty Films' way of proving to people that they're not ripping off Star Wars because light sabres are trademarked by George Lucas? That shit doesn't look cool or badass whatsoever: it looks fucking impractical, ESPECIALLY in a distant future timeline where humanity colonised countless planets.

Going back to how the starship battles were done, it's honestly a mixed bag for me. I like how they looked but practically speaking, they made no sense whatsoever! This show uses two-dimensional war tactics that would've been feasible during the times of Genghis Khan... in space, where everything exists in three dimensions. Say what you will about Star Wars, but at least the fucking starship battles existed in three dimensions as opposed to the two! How the FUCK can I cheer on any battle that goes on when the vast majority of the strategy relies heavily on pretending like you're the ancient Spartans fending off the Persian invasion?

On that note, let's talk about how this show likes to tout about strategy. Now every commander in this show is apparently a bloody genius because they manage to exploit the enemy's weaknesses during every encounter and then leave them scattering about like roaches... or so this programme's defenders like to say. In reality, every single battle relies on one side being a complete and total dumbass when it would be grossly impractical to do so and then having the other side take full advantage of their idiocy. How the fuck is that "superior strategy" when they're just taking advantage of their enemies acting like a bunch of idiots? Also, this show likes to say that morale is the most important aspect of battle or some rubbish like that but I beg to differ. Morale doesn't help your lasers fire better, it doesn't smite the enemy quicker. Morale is important, but nowhere near as important as having GOOD battle tactics in a three-dimensional plane that DON'T rely heavily on exploiting your opponent's impractical idiocy.

The justification for this horseshit is even stupider than the battles themselves are upon retrospect. Apparently, only a small portion of the vastness that is outer space is actually usable which means that a lot of the battles have to take place in similar areas over and over again. Whoever came up with the concept of "usable space" needs to get kicked square in the knackers and then given a lobotomy performed with a rusty butcher knife. If that ain't the laziest horseshit ever devised to justify sheer impracticality, I seriously don't know what is. There is NO way you can convince me, or anyone else for that matter that in the VAST openness of space, only a small portion of it would actually be usable for shit like battles and transportation and whatnot.

On top of everything else, what REALLY gets my goat with this programme that also never ceases to make me laugh raucously is THE COMPLETE ABSENCE OF ANY FORM OF ALIENS!!!! I mean, who the FUCK dropped the ball on that one? Do you sincerely expect ANY rational person on this planet to believe that in the hundreds of years that mankind spent colonising the stars, they never even encountered so much as a single alien? No Twi'leks, no Pau'ans, no Togrutas, no Wookies, Gungans, no Hive, no Vex, no Eliksni, no cosmic space worms that act as the direct emissaries of the Darkness, no giant space sphere that acts as a harbinger of doom, NONE of that stuff even exist in this fucking universe. Aliens don't even get mentioned ONCE throughout the entire programme.

When you look at how the planets are in terms of setup. Nearly each planet we see is analagous to Earth, and they all have stuff that exist only on Earth in the real world... you know, like trees, fruit, vegetables, bread, cars, metal, guns, horses, water, all that good shit. So please, explain to me how a bunch of refugees from a war-torn planet even managed to find planets that were remotely habitable and then turn them into nigh-duplicates of pre-cataclysm Earth. Did they just take all this stuff to barren worlds and then used some kind of voodoo magic to make the planets they visited like Earth? Or did they just happen across Earth lookalikes that conveniently had all this shit? It literally makes no sense whatsoever and despite the depth and detail given to us about the conflict between the Empire and the Alliance, we BARELY get any information about shit like this and that just has to be the most infuriating thing about it all.

Now, some of you out there will probably be scoffing and then asking why any of this shit is important. Well, I'll tell you why: because if this show is trying so hard to be a commentary on the human condition, I would at least expect it to get crucial details right that would actually make the setting much more plausible and thus, easier for the analytical mind to take seriously. This is a show where there are fictional historians giving us fucking documentaries to watch. I'm pretty sure that I'm well within my rights to expect that it actually gets stuff like this right! This wasn't an incredibly entertaining show to watch, and my suspension of disbelief didn't exist for 65% of the show's run. If it actually got the details like the ones I pointed out right, MAYBE it would've been a much more immersive programme to watch and I could actually reciprocate the praise this show gets instead of being a contrary twat who has to hate everything that's highly rated because the praise surrounding it is complete and total horseshit. But I digress, because now it's time to talk about the superficial stuff.

In terms of artwork, the entire programme is quite the visual delectation. Also, this is just a minor bit of praise I have but whatever: I absolutely ADORE the fact that everyone's eyes aren't the size of their foreheads and actually look like human eyes. It just adds to the atmosphere of the show and while it doesn't get the important shit right, at least I can say that it doesn't look like fucking Code Geass with their noodle people that have huge eyes and tits that defy the laws of physics. On top of that, all the backdrops are beautifully designed and the general aesthetic for the Empire (at least in regards to the nobility) is pretty damn nice to say the least. I mean, I WOULD question why nobles in the year 3000-something-or-other would dress like they're medieval England royalty but hey, at least it's posh so it fits.

Animation starts off rather choppy and inconsistent but that's to be expected because it's an OVA from the late 80s. This was also a year or two before Akira was released and anime was still stuck in the ultra-violent OVA phase of its existence, so I suppose that also adds into why the animation isn't the greatest. However, it does gradually get better. Also, let's not forget that this is an OVA series that was released over the course of 10 years. The budget obviously gets better utilised as animation technology improves and there's a noticeable increase in quality in the animation over time. If I really had to say, I would say that LOGH at its peak resembles Evangelion at its best. With all of that in mind, let's also be grateful that Kircheis and Annerose were never in the same hospital room.

If there's one area that I really had to praise LOGH on the most though, it would have to be the audio. The OST is bloody amazing to the point where it almost manages to put John Williams and his compositions to shame. On another note, the voice acting was phenomenal. I seldom comment on Japanese voice-acting because I don't understand the languages enough to truly gauge their performances but this had to be the one anime where the performances managed to throw me for a loop. This was a project where countless A-list voice actors and actresses gathered together to lend their talent, and my GOD does it shine through. If you've watched any amount of anime in Japanese, some of the voicework should ring a bell. I didn't even expect Vegeta's voice actor to even be in this series, let alone Kappei Yamaguchi but hey, it's a lovely surprise for those of us who furiously masturbate to the creed of sub-only.

Now, all things considered... I would say that I enjoyed LOGH to a certain degree. The programme itself can get REALLY entertaining when it reminds us of GAA Berserk and shows Reinhardt and Yang sticking it to their superiors. However, this entire show is just SO fucking tedious to watch. It takes 26 episodes to just set up the groundwork and it isn't until Episode 60 when the programme really starts taking off and actually becomes an entertaining show to watch (whenever Yang isn't in the frame that is) for more than 51% of an episode. As a commentary on the human condition, LOGH would've been an amazing show to watch if it weren't so blatantly biased toward an autocracy run by a level-headed ruler (seriously Beatnik: what the FUCK were you on when you wrote your LOGH reviews?). As a work of science fiction, it's far too tedious to even be considered entertaining by casual standards. Say what you will about stuff like Star Wars and Star Trek, but at least they influenced generations of people and led to the development of innovations that we currently make use of to this day and age (i.e. HUDs, cell phones, bionic hands, etc). LOGH did nothing of the sort and by the end of it all, this show is nothing more than Portal if you were to lack ANY surface to put the portals onto. But hey, what do I know? I'm just a fat guy on the internet talking shit about animu.

Anyway, that's all for now. Feedback's always welcome and with that, I'm out. Peace :)

***

SIEG KAISER REINHARDT!!!

Do note that even though I gave LOGH a 5/10 on my review of it, it's not indicative of what I actually think the show deserves. Holistically, it feels just about right at a 7/10 but I don't like it enough to give it a 7. I was so tempted to just give it a 5/10 on my list again, but I need to break up the monotony.