Utsuro no Hako to Zero no Maria
The Empty Box and Zeroth Maria

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Let me say first, Hakomari may or may not be a masterpiece, but it is one of the most fun and unique series you will find.

Please I beg you do not listen to the berganda guy. Just look at his favorites and you will realize how inconsistent this guy is ( putting monster and 20th century in to critize nonsensical complexity is ridiculous).

That being said yes this series can get cringey, and edgy. But its good stuff, its fun and you are missing out on one of the best LNs if you don’t give it a chance.

- vol 1: fun but yeah has its flaws, ... almost made me tear up though
- vol 2: weak but has some merits
- vol 3-4: fun and amazing
- vol 5-6: amazing
- vol 7: masterpiece

As, of now, one of the top 5 light novel series on MAL, and as someone whose only read a few light novels, I thought it would be fair to take a dip into this series to get me more into the medium. With countless reviews praising it as genius, and some spouting it as a masterpiece, I thought I would also be rating this a 10 in the end along with the many others. However, as you can see by my score, HakoMaria is by all means not what its all cut out to be.

When I finished this series, because of the ... little light novel exposure I had, I thought it would be best not to treat it as just a light novel and compare to light novels, but as a book series. With this perspective in mind, let me tell why I don't think this is a super great book series.

I think one of the main problems with this story are two things: complexity and characters. To begin, if we strip away all the fluff from the conflicts, if we actually look at the stories without all the dressing, we get some pretty overused clichés and concepts. Now, I am not saying these clichés and concepts are a bad thing, I am just saying there is nothing original about it. The author tries to add these complex tidbits as a way to, in a sense, "distract" the reader from what is going on, but for a person like myself, I already new what was going to happen next. Not only that, he extrapolates those idea and draws them out as long as possible. It gets to the point were the worst arc takes up an entire two novels! I forced myself to get through. In other words, the author tries to add complexity to predictable story plots which in some cases, makes reading such a drag.

And then there is volume 7, something, in comparison to the rest, is actually pretty good. So does having a good ending mean all the rest is good as well? That is up to debate, but I will allow you to make the choice for yourself.

Another problem with this story is the characters, in particular, those stereotypes. You got your pretty stereotypical protagonist, that bossy girl, that pretty girl, that smart girl, that smart evil guy, the cool guy, that quite girl, and then might as well throw in a villain that really doesn't have a reason for doing anything except add to the plot. If this work was a masterpiece, I need more realistic characters please. Now, I am not saying I don't like the characters, I particularly enjoyed Oomine the most, but I just need better character development and something that can really relate me to them, not just some protagonist whose like "oh, I want to maintain my normal life" and that is it. And then, suddenly, he starts doing some mad #### to protect this philosophy. Even though the character's thoughts and psyche are explored, that does not entail realism or relatability.

Overall, do I hate this series? No. I enjoyed reading it, and I enjoyed the entire concept, and I thought it was cool. I don't want to hate upon the series, I do think its good, the ending was great, but in my opinion, this series by no means deserves masterpiece status.

Anyway, I'll leave the rest up to you. Take a dip.

First I will let the writing speak for itself, in this spoiler-free passage below:

"“I was convinced that I had grasped your behavioral patterns completely by now. But I couldn’t predict your statement just now at all. Can you imagine how amusing this is for someone accustomed to eternal boredom?” she says, looking delighted."

There's more. For instance, in the opening scenes of this supposedly dark and gritty series, the main heroine reveals her reality-defying power by telling the main character about the color of a girl's panties. It's a cold open, a rolling intro, and a crash into a panty flash.

God and Buddha help me, ... I read every volume to witness and report on the hundreds of examples of awful dialogue and Light Novel cliches, If your mind can interpret this trainwreck as salvageable, you have an inhumanly forgiving mind that I am unable to comprehend.

I've helped edit literary abortions-in-progress, and have produced terrible work myself. I understand that madness that results in teenage characters using fifty words instead of eight. I sympathize with the stupidity of tacking backstories of abuse onto small children and having one mutter, literally, "murdermurdermurder" in the least subtle possible way of setting up the twist villain of a book. But the humane way to handle those manuscripts is to label them as inherently irrecoverable, and then to euthanize them.

You might think this will be funny, or at the least, a campy and edgy read. This is true for many light novels and web novels. By any faith or philosophy you might hold, trust me, this is not true here. Worse than just bad, the writing is boring. If you are into bad video game mechanics being described in pointless and excruciating detail, you know who you are, and no force in imagination will restrain you from reading this.

If you do not give this writer a single yen, and avoid supporting the paid publication of further work, my work will be done. I've read good postmodern books. I love the genre. You can fly through songs, bodies, and minds. For your own benefit and pleasure, I urge you to choose something better than this. You deserve it.