Shissou Nikki
Disappearance Diary

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Stumbling upon a September 2016 article on Zimmerit, after discovering the Awake opening animation for Japan S.P.F.X. CONVENTION III, I found the man who popularized, and essentially established Lolicon in the Japanese market (for better or worse... emphasis on worse), Hideo Azuma. I feel down a real rabbit hole in old-school, golden-age anime and my love for the Daicon animations and the usage of the popular, yet highly under appreciated today, Itano Circus often used in mecha anime of yester-year that was utilized as well in Awake. Although Awake itself isn’t very ambitious in its execution and it derives most of its appeal towards the ... absurdity of little girls dressed in kaiju-type monsters and giant mechs and then having them hundreds of them all lose their clothes in waves. But what it did have going for it was the not-so-subtle ripple effect that swam in the wake of Daincon III & IV and their otaku culture through lolicon. All thanks to Azuma. Curious on his achievements and the history of his work in the industry, I stumbled upon Disappearance Diary. A story so captivating I couldn’t put it down in the after hours past midnight.

Disappearance Diary is an autobiographical tale on the author’s life before he made it “big” as the manga artist legend that most obsessed fans in the subculture recognize today. This is not the first of its kind that I read. Junji Ito wrote a manga volume dedicated to his life with his two cats, and if you think the man famous for Uzumaki making a story about his two cats is off kilter, you’d be surprised how well he incorporates his style into the panels. Azuma is no different in this regard. He has a good way of drawing each character as round, soft, and blissfully ignorant looking as you might expect from him. Each chapter is full of little story about his life. Although the art style looks playful like a newspaper comic strip, the life he lived is depressing as hell to put it bluntly.

Azuma depicts himself starved, having to sneak through dumpsters and litter for moldy food, dirty leftovers, and items that exceed the purchase-by date. He is constantly freezing due to the cold temperatures outdoors, which seem to take place mostly during the winter season, unfortunately. He also has to schedule out his trips away from the woods near civilization to scavenge for blankets, drinks, and survival tools as well as when he can decide to make a fire without alerting the nearby townsfolk. It’s the lowest of lows and an example of how depraved someone can turn into.

Despite all this, it’s an interesting character study. His point of view on most situations is at times funny as they are concerning. Given the state he is in his life, I think it’s all fair to look past his decisions bumming’ around. The way he frames most panels gives for an optimistic viewpoint and in turn creates a comfy read through. It’s sort of like a low cost, low reward, and high questionable way of camping, living off the grid, and playing vagabond. But that’s looking at the situation with glory. It’s obviously not a way one should live and it gives a great perspective on people that struggle with homelessness every single day. It’s crazy seeing where he is now and knowing that he no longer has to struggle with the occurrences he encountered from this collection of chronicles on homelessness and begging.

This is an interesting read. It’s very insightful and helps me appreciate more my privilege and knowledge of my networks and loved ones who surround me. Give this a good read through. It’s very short, very insightful, and very different from the rest of his work. Easily a strong 8 to a light 9. Quite possibly the manga I’d recommend to someone looking for a slice of life read, but a manga that isn’t serious in nature despite its subject matter. Don’t skimp out on your own entertainment.

I feel that some people may think I've been far too lenient with the my choices in the scores however I think that this manga is an absolute masterpiece, the way that the art provides a complete and clear contrast to the seriousness of the topics discussed in the story is masterfully done.

The characters or more like single character is so well rounded and yet not, like any human he has many flaws but they are clearly labeled and shown in an almost comical, anecdotal way, yet this somehow doesn't at all take away from the incredibly deep and dark stories that are told.

I ... highly recommend giving this a read, for anyone interested, I reviewed this manga in video format, if you'd like to check it out here's the link: https://youtu.be/OZVvCBwOCDs

When one sees or hears the name Hideo Azuma, one either immediately thinks of lolita manga or simply asks, "who in the hell is that?" He's known as being the "father of lolicon," with many of his works being pornographic in some way. One would not expect this man to have much interest in drawing things outside of science fiction and lolicon, though he certainly has an impressive list of manga titles to his name.

So an award-winning book like Disappearance Diary comes as a bit of a surprise; it's neither pornographic nor science fiction, and is in fact an autobiography of sorts, told in a ... very humorous way.

Azuma features himself as a short, fat, goggle-eyed character in this recollection of his days as a hopeless alcoholic and as a homeless person. A story that would otherwise be painful, gut-wrenching and difficult to read is made entertaining and more pleasantly poignant through his use of humor and cartoony artwork. He isn't afraid to tell us the truth, and his sometimes frank presentation is almost as hilarious as his rather dry commentary.

At first we don't really learn what drives him to do this to himself. The book is not presented in chronological order and we are introduced to him when we are thrust into his first experience of being homeless. We do know that his homelessness is a choice rather than an unfortunate circumstance. We come to learn of his dependency on alcohol and cigarettes and his massive workload as an artist as the book progresses, as well as his rather pushover nature and the fact he even as a wife (largely unseen until the second half of the book).

The book is divided into three main sections, each dealing with a different time in his rather lengthy exile from the stresses of his life, and focus on the primary concerns he had during each period. In his first homeless experience, it was worrying about having enough to eat. In the second, it was dealing with certain individuals he worked with, and the ridiculous things he had to put up with from them ("YOU DIDN'T DRAW FEATHERS ON THE ARROWS!"). In another, it was his attempts to avoid difficult fellow patients in a hospital, along with the staff.

Azuma himself says that the manga "has a positive outlook on life, and so it has been made with as much realism removed as possible." It's very likely that some of the things he presents are indeed fictional, comedic twists on his experiences, but some appear to be very honest recollections, such as the threat of cirrhosis hanging over him like the Sword of Damocles, or his first capture by the police, who initially believe him to be the murder suspect they were after. His story is a fascinating one, and upon learning of his stressors and what he had to deal with as a professional artist, we can't really blame him for wanting out, even though his circumstances were largely his own fault. A person can put up with only so much, and it's easy to sympathize when he does everything he can to escape from what feels more and more like a prison to a life that, while certainly not easy, feels manageable by comparison. The dialogue is often as funny, if not funnier, than Azuma's stark narration (during a sequence in which Azuma has a severe coughing fit, a nurse says, "Oh, Doctor, there's blood!" to which the doctor simply responds, "THAT'S not good!"), and his cartoony visuals turn disgusting things into visions of hilarity (it's difficult to not laugh at his frequent vomiting, or the rather blunt depicition of him defecating in the forest). He even indicates that there was more, but that he'll save it for another time, leaving us to wonder if he might really provide a sequel, or if his parting words are another dose of his dry humor.

Disappearance Diary is an engaging, extremely funny manga, and a surprisingly quick read for a 200-page book. One doesn't have to be a fan of Azuma (or even familiar with him at all) to enjoy this story, but it may turn one into a fan before the final page is turned.