| Ok some author notes i guess before the 1st chapter reason for title? - i want to be different :P i wanna do something random... i'll think of something later without further ado ****** It was sudden and without warning. Last thing I remember was being at home, but now I was in some kind of forest. I could hear a river or stream of sorts not too far off and there appears to be edible wild fruits around. I have no idea what is going on nor how I got here. As I try to recollect what happened leading up, I hear the very soft sound of rustling leaves. A sound I've learn to attribute to a predator hunting prey. I bring up my guard and wait for it to come out or sounds of it leaving. As the sound gets more audible, I turn towards the direction but am caught off guard by the sight of a girl. Relaxing, I lower my hands and look towards her again taking notice of a few things; she was wearing small bit of cloth to cover her breasts and around her waist was what appeared to be a slightly worn out sarong tied at her right hip. Then I suddenly noticed her arms and legs from her elbows and knees respectfully were covered in what looked like soft short fur, she had wolf like ears on her head, and a wolf like tail behind her. “This must be a dream.” I mutter to myself. The girl smiles at me playfully tail wagging side to side. “You look fun, wanna play with me?” Still not sure of what's going on I reply, “Play?” “Do you have any preferences?” she asks as she teasingly lifts her sarong revealing her thigh. This is too much, I can't take any of this seriously. As I thought, this I let out a sigh and simply turn to walk away. But before I fully turned I saw out the corner of my eye the girl crouch over and tail become still lowered slightly eying me, 'A snap? From that distance?' As I thought to myself recognizing the tail and ear movements I quickly try to turn back around to guard but was too late she had already lunged for me. Tackling me to the ground I reflexively using the momentum of the tackle with my right foot to kick her off over me. I then roll back to my feet with her looking at me upside down with a surprised expression in her eyes, but they quickly became eyes filled with interest. Getting back to her feet she asks me, “Not as weak as you look, are you?” With a involuntary smile I reply, “You're quicker than you look.” “Guess I should get a little more serious then, try to stop this!” she says as she rushes me again this time bringing her claws in an open upper cut fashion. Narrowly evading I now have a cut up the side of my face as the wolf girl licks the blood from her claw. “Not bad.” “This play seems rather dangerous, don't think I want to anymore.” I respond. “Don't worry I won't kill you, after I win I'll have my way with you until I'm satisfied.” Not entirely sure of how to respond I ask, “And what way is that, if may ask?” “Mating, what else?” apparently sensing my ignorance she responds matter of factually. My mouth hangs open slightly taken aback, “....What?” “Your reasonably strong, for a human, but not very bright are you? Winner decides the fate of the loser, that's how all battles are.” So she says as if trying to teach a child. Before I could ask another question she rushes forward again bring her right claw up to swing from right to left, I respond by just barely being able to guard against it when I heard slight crack. Seemingly have stopped her movements for the moment I move my left arm ignoring pain and pin her right under my arm then using my right palm I strike her right shoulder, and audible popping sound is heard and I feel her arm removed from its socket. I then move back about a meter or two and examine my own arm while keeping an eye on the girl. It doesn't appear to be anything serious but only just. With a bit of pain her eyes she holds her right shoulder apparently not sure of what I did. The look in her eyes seems less playful now and more of one wanting to win a contest for dominance as she crouches into a snapping attack like position. I begin to back away but then trip over something under my feet. She then lunges at me, there's no way I'd be able to force her off as I am now even with her right arm dislocated. I then feel my back hit against a tree preventing me from falling fully over my foot still in the air, when I suddenly feel pressure on my foot pushing my knee practically to my chest. The wolf girl lunged face first straight into my foot and collapsed on the ground unconscious. I look at her in disbelief not sure what I should do now. 'Well I guess I won..' as I think that she might not attack upon waking up I proceed to tend to my own injuries as I wait there for her to wake up. |
Clarus_NoxNov 26, 2014 9:22 AM
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| YAY~ i got the green lights AN- originally since i had work planned for today for 10 hours i was going to upload 2 chapters since i was most likely going to be in too much pain tomorrow and day after to bother posting(was gonna be removing a roof). but plans have changed and we not removing it for another 3 weeks..... well there goes today's plans :T so i decided i would post chapter 3 if 4 people post some feedback on these 2 chapters im experimenting with a new writing style and tenses so please don't be over bearing in the criticism now without further ado onto chapter 2 ******* Chapter 2 The sun had set, and it doesn't appear the girl was going to wake up anytime soon, in fact she tosses every now and then appearing to be fast asleep. After getting a good look at her I notice she is very well built but not so much that that it retracts from her beauty. The girl has snow-ish white hair, and fur as it would seem, her wolf ears twitching at the slightest of sounds but overall not reacting much. Her white tail's movements tell me she is sleeping contently. As I look at her tail I subconsciously stat to move to touch it. My hand makes it two inches from her tail before I stop myself. 'Given how sensitive a tail is... wouldn't grabbing her tail be the same as grabbing her breast or other areas...?' As I think this and retract my and not wanting to molest a sleeping girl. My eyes wonder and begin to 'molest' her themselves as I examine her features. Her top was probably less than a centimeter from being form fitting as I could easily distinguish her breast as they rose and fell with her breathing. Her breast were small, perhaps only an A-cup at best. She was laying on her left side right now and as she had tossed and turned her sarong had become a little loose, needless to say it wasn't doing its its job at right now as I could see everything, the curves of her thighs,her hips, and even curves of her vagina... I quickly turn away, face slightly flushed, as my conscious caught up with me. 'She is easily one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. But she was a wolf girl. They don't exist outside of myth and fantasy.' My mind drifted back to trying to ascertain my predicament. 'I remember going to bed yesterday, and I know I woke up and went about my day like normal. But why can't I actually recall anything between yesterday and my arrival. I didn't just wake up here, no it was more like I was suddenly here. But that makes even less sense...' “This is a dream... that's all there is to it. Wouldn't be the first time I woke up in a dream... Guess I'll just watch this dream play out, might be interesting.” I say to myself aloud. I look back at the wolf girl who doesn't appear to be waking anytime soon. Deciding to try to find a town or some form of civilization, I get up and leave the area as quietly as possible avoiding leaves and twigs. Seemingly appearing to have gotten away without disturbing the wolf girl, I head toward the river. Upon arrival I look around for any signs but what I find is much better. While slightly difficult to make out given the lack of light, I see a town off in the distance. “Three miles? Maybe two and a half.” I say to myself as I judge the distance, as I begin to walk towards the town. Less than an hour later I arrive at the border of the town. “Great...” The town is deserted and falling apart. Some of the wooden buildings look like they'd only need be pushed to fall in. I walk into the town to look for any kind of information but I quickly realize that I won't be gaining much of anything from here. I then hear a sudden sound of something being dragged behind me. I turn towards the sound on guard but there is nothing there. Then I hear the sound to my left. But nothing can be seen there either. “Seems I've found a rater experienced one. Rather than running blindly you seem to be able to figure out my location when I make noise. But, only when I make noise.” said a voice from right behind me. I turn in slight panic, but don't see anyone... I calm myself and look around for ideal hiding locations. To my right there is a patch of darkness between two buildings. I have no solid basis but I can tell that whoever it is, is hiding in the shadows there. “So you've found me. Guess hiding would be pointless now then, wouldn't it?” as the voice speaks the owner reveals themselves. It was a fairly tall woman. At least, at first glance. Her upper body was human but he lower body was full serpent. 'First a wolf girl and now a lamia? What am I in some JRPG now?' I thought to myself as I was approached. “I'm hungry but I'll make you a deal. How bout before I eat you I send you to heaven” with a devilish smile her split tongue sticks out tasting the air.... |
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| i can be very convincing :P |
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| Colors of werewolves shouldn't matter just as everyone's hair color can differ. Now I'm off to actually read this ^^ |
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| Not bad. I think. I don't approve of beating a werewolf in a fight, but it ain't my story. On the side note, Chapter 2. Kinda creepy bro. Other than that, pretty nice. I'd give it one Pasha up. |
| When I go for the throat, I go straight for the juggler. |
| It's pretty nice--the shift in tenses from time to time is a little bit unnerving, and the mechanics for beating a werewolf are kind of strange--but it's chill otherwise. |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
Hetlan said: Not bad. I think. I don't approve of beating a werewolf in a fight, but it ain't my story. On the side note, Chapter 2. Kinda creepy bro. Other than that, pretty nice. I'd give it one Pasha up. creepy how? :3 |
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| AN - 5 posts so here it is still haven't figured out what random thing i wanna do tho without further ado ***** Chapter 3 After regaining my composure, I try gauge the lamia's strength. 'How do I beat this one? I don't have a weapon. Should I run? But she'd just follow me if I did. I need to lose sight of her first.' Glancing around I notice something that looks like a rusty knife. 'Better than nothing' I think to myself as I start to make a move for it but the next thing I know the lamia has her tail constricting me. Fruitlessly I try struggle. “Heheh. You think you can escape my hold? Haha tell you what I'll let you do what you want if you manage to escape in the next 2 minutes but it won't be possible I tell you.” she proclaims as she pats my cheek with her tail. “Really? Then...” I say with a rather evil grin as I suddenly bite down hard on the tip of her tail. The very next instant she screeches and throws me away holding the tip of her tail as though to make sure it was still there. “You son of a bitch!!! You bit my tail!!!” her expression was one of pure rage. As luck would have it, I landed right next to the knife and picked it up and pocketed it before the lamia addressed me. At her outburst I came up with an idea most may think was suicidal, but I knew I had to make her lose her temper and under estimate me if I wanted to win. There was no way I was getting out of that hold again. With a look that could be called 'surprising revelation' I respond, “So does this mean I win? Deafening silence. That all there was. The lamia's facial expression was one of someone looking at a sane person having gone full retard. With a forced smile she responds, “Yes, yes you win.” Picking up on the fact she wants this reply, I can't resist the urge to play along, “Awesome! What do I win?” The lamia closes her eye and her dark smile grows wider, to which I take my chance. As she opens her eyes and yells, “AN EXCUCIATING DEATH!!!! Huh?” I'm no longer there. Having ducked into one of the buildings I move through a hole in the wall and try to escape the town. But am suddenly cut off by the lamia. Smiling darkly at me she begins to approach when suddenly she is tackled from the side and through a building. All I had heard was growling. I make my way through the hole and see the lamia and the wolf girl fighting. The wolf girl takes a swing with her left claw but the lamia dodges nimbly and counter by trying to constrict the wolf girl who evades. I can see their movement and tell the wolf girl is easily faster but they may be equals in strength. But something is off. The wolf girl throws another left claw but her right arm remains limp. The lamia dodges again this time sends the wolf girl flying with a hit from her tail. The wolf girl stands up seemingly not hurt badly but her skin is shining in the moonlight. 'Sweat?' I then notice her holding her right shoulder with a pained expression. 'Is she fighting with her shoulder still dislocated?!' My mouth drops as I observe the situation. 'She can't win like this. The pain is slowing her down. Think. How can I get the lamia to ignore her?' “HEY WORM LADY!!” I shout out knowing this would piss her off more. Which was confirmed when she slowly turned towards me with an expression of sheer hatred. My plan working I just smile arrogantly to further taunt her and simply raise my middle finger to her. The lamia's face contorts a bit and I see behind her the wolf girl's expression that of someone who witnessed another committing the ultimate taboo as her mouth hangs open in disbelief. I then run back through the house and head towards an area of houses. The lamia doesn't take long to be right behind me as I rush into a open doorway. As the lamia follows I simply jump back out of the house from a window near the doorway. Bobbing and weaving through things and having her anger get the better of her I manage to continue avoiding recapture if only just. But it doesn't last long. The lamia simply stops evading the obstacles and simply breaks through them. The next thing I know she has coiled around me again but only my neck this time. As she lifts me by my neck towards her face, she says “If you beg for mercy I might make it painless.” There was nothing but acid in her voice but I decided to try to speak hoping she'd allow me to breath thinking I would beg. It worked I took in what little air I could and pulled out the rusty knife and slashed it across her face but she evaded or tried to. There was some blood on the blade. I was dropped as she held her face in pain. “THAT'S IT!!!” she lunges for me, I can see I cut over her left eye. But then suddenly something appears before me and the lamia. The very next second the lamia is sent flying into a building. Landing on her feet I'm left assuming the wolf girl had kicked her with her right foot. The lamia doesn't appear to be moving. “Are you stupid?! Who in their right mind would pick a fight with an Echidna!?” she then sighs as she grabs hold of her right shoulder again in a bit of pain. “She approached me saying she was gonna eat me. Hey sit down, I'll fix your arm.” but the wolf girl had sat down before I finished my sentence, right when I told her to sit. Though I guess she was just tired. I move next to her and pop her arm back into place. As she lets out a wince but then notices her arm doesn't hurt near as bad as it did. “We should move away from here before she wakes up. This way Master.” the wolf girl says as she grabs my hand and pulls me into the forest. As I register what was just said the adrenaline fades and I almost immediately begin to pass out from the pain and exhaustion. |
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Clarus_Nox said: Hetlan said: Not bad. I think. I don't approve of beating a werewolf in a fight, but it ain't my story. On the side note, Chapter 2. Kinda creepy bro. Other than that, pretty nice. I'd give it one Pasha up. creepy how? :3 Tryin' to grab dat tail. |
| When I go for the throat, I go straight for the juggler. |
Hetlan said: Clarus_Nox said: creepy how? :3 Tryin' to grab dat tail. you cant tell me you never saw a cat or dog sleeping next to u and not wanted to pet it how is it any less creepy than you throwing yourself on the girl? :T |
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| Already posting again? That's pretty ridiculous. I'd say cut back and post maybe less than 3 chapters in a day? It becomes hard to stomach if you post too often--but I'm a prime culprit of doing that, so I cannot really talk. #1 Use of Badassery has been wasted... You have 1 left. Use it wisely. |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
YandereTheEmo said: Already posting again? That's pretty ridiculous. I'd say cut back and post maybe less than 3 chapters in a day? It becomes hard to stomach if you post too often--but I'm a prime culprit of doing that, so I cannot really talk. #1 Use of Badassery has been wasted... You have 1 left. Use it wisely. according to Su this was permitable |
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Clarus_Nox said: YandereTheEmo said: Already posting again? That's pretty ridiculous. I'd say cut back and post maybe less than 3 chapters in a day? It becomes hard to stomach if you post too often--but I'm a prime culprit of doing that, so I cannot really talk. #1 Use of Badassery has been wasted... You have 1 left. Use it wisely. according to Su this was permitable I'm not saying it's not--I'm just saying cut back for your readers' sake. |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
Clarus_Nox said: Hetlan said: Tryin' to grab dat tail. you cant tell me you never saw a cat or dog sleeping next to u and not wanted to pet it how is it any less creepy than you throwing yourself on the girl? :T Pet it? yes. Grab its tail? No. And I rechecked my posts, and I don't believe I actually did that. But for the sake of my retort, she was awake. XP |
| When I go for the throat, I go straight for the juggler. |
| but u saying i can only be reckless and have it pay off 1 more time goes against my personality i only won the fight with the lamia because silvia showed up reason i wasn't defeated immediately was due to her own arrogance and my tactical ability (that and believing i am in a dream thus no real consequences to worry bout) i just don't see how that counts as "badassery" |
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Hetlan said: Clarus_Nox said: you cant tell me you never saw a cat or dog sleeping next to u and not wanted to pet it how is it any less creepy than you throwing yourself on the girl? :T Pet it? yes. Grab its tail? No. And I rechecked my posts, and I don't believe I actually did that. But for the sake of my retort, she was awake. XP ah i did say grab :T poor choice of words then :P |
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Clarus_Nox said: but u saying i can only be reckless and have it pay off 1 more time goes against my personality i only won the fight with the lamia because silvia showed up reason i wasn't defeated immediately was due to her own arrogance and my tactical ability (that and believing i am in a dream thus no real consequences to worry bout) i just don't see how that counts as "badassery" Going against your personality xD? This isn't a shounen manga... Just because you have a strong will and the "power of friendship" doesn't mean you can overcome physical possibilities. I was referring to the werewolf btw... not the lamia... Anyhow, I'd cut back on that too, mostly because it's unrealistic and hard to swallow--regardless of what circumstances you put around it. |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
Clarus_Nox said: Hetlan said: Pet it? yes. Grab its tail? No. And I rechecked my posts, and I don't believe I actually did that. But for the sake of my retort, she was awake. XP ah i did say grab :T poor choice of words then :P OOOhhh... that's what you meant. That's completely reasonable. *Nods sagely* |
| When I go for the throat, I go straight for the juggler. |
YandereTheEmo said: Clarus_Nox said: but u saying i can only be reckless and have it pay off 1 more time goes against my personality i only won the fight with the lamia because silvia showed up reason i wasn't defeated immediately was due to her own arrogance and my tactical ability (that and believing i am in a dream thus no real consequences to worry bout) i just don't see how that counts as "badassery" Going against your personality xD? This isn't a shounen manga... Just because you have a strong will and the "power of friendship" doesn't mean you can overcome physical possibilities. I was referring to the werewolf btw... not the lamia... Anyhow, I'd cut back on that too, mostly because it's unrealistic and hard to swallow--regardless of what circumstances you put around it. i think you just took this to a whole different level :T the reason behind winning against silvia was 1 she was holding back(she playing until the last move) 2 despite popular opinion i do have considerable fighting experience and 3 sheer dumb luck that i tripped at right moment which still doesnt qualify for badassery but its fine also i posted the 3rd chapter because i said i would if 4 people commented and they did so i posted it but now i need write the next 5 chapters for the rest of the week |
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Clarus_Nox said: i think you just took this to a whole different level :T the reason behind winning against silvia was 1 she was holding back(she playing until the last move) 2 despite popular opinion i do have considerable fighting experience and 3 sheer dumb luck that i tripped at right moment which still doesnt qualify for badassery but its fine also i posted the 3rd chapter because i said i would if 4 people commented and they did so i posted it but now i need write the next 5 chapters for the rest of the week Like I said, regardless of what Deus Ex Machina circumstances you put up against it, it's still very unbelievable. To put this in perspective, imagine a human fighting a bear, without any weapons, and with a broken leg. Regardless of whether she was playing or not :T, it's still a Deus Ex Machina, which is pretty dangerous territory in normal literature. But hey man, I'm not writing your story, so I'll just take the back seat here. |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
| The rule of thumb is that we are only given two "bad ass" moments, its up to you has to use them lol don't waste it. Okay here are my comments: |
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| Ima decided ima just post as i finish chapters AN - i figured out the random thing i wanna do!!! oh also adding colors now, ima give back story on names :D let's start with our werewolf, Silvia - feminine form of Silvius, derived from the latin word silva which means wood or forest, it can also be loosely translated for naming purposes as "One of the Forest" or more simply "Of the Forest" now without further ado onto chapter 4 ****** Chapter 4 When my conscious returned I felt 2 things; cold everywhere except to my right which was exceedingly warm, soft, and comfy. Still in a sleepy stupor, I decide to cuddle into it hoping for more warmth before shortly falling back to sleep. ----- As I feel the soft warmth of morning I begin to stir. Still holding onto the warmth I had found earlier that night I try to pull myself into it as my body begins to register the cold at my back. Sleepily I open my eyes and am greeted with what seems to be a piece of cloth I had buried my head into. As the rest of my body begins to wake and feeling returns I notice that whatever I'm holding onto is roughly my length. Turning my head to the left I notice that under my head is a soft pure white arm of the wolf girl. Now more aware I notice that her arm goes under my head and around to the center of my back as her other arm is positioned the opposite, under my arm and towards the center of my back. In my sleep I seemed to have grabbed onto her for warmth, despite being shorter than me I am somehow position with my head in her breast. Our legs currently entwined with one another. No matter how I try to think of it, this position is far too intimate for me, as my anxiety begins to act up. As I try to pry myself carefully from her, the wolf girl seems to sense her source of warmth leaving and pulls me back in. I cant say I don't like how it feels but it still feels weird and foreign to me, being hugged. Eventually I manage to pry myself free, or rather by coincidence, she decides to roll over onto her back leaving me to her left. Getting up, I examine the surroundings. A near pristine river is but only a few meters away clear enough one should be safe to drink from it straight. The air is fairly cold despite the warm sunlight, the dew on the grass glistening from refracted light. 'I still need to thank this girl for helping me. I wouldn't have won that last fight without her help.' thinking back to the previous night's event I begin to go over in my head what had transpired. 'No... was that even a victory? What would have happened if she didn't show up? I got lucky with the bite and the knife as well as that snake falling for my taunts but in the end it was this girl's interference that made the most difference.... I owe her more than just a simple thanks. Not to mention an apology for assuming she was unhurt and leaving her with the injury I put on her.' I take another look at the wolf girl sleeping on the grass. Surrounded by a surreal amount of glistening light from the morning dew, and what appears to be dew on her herself looking like a solitary patch of pure snow in the middle of green field. Having rolled back over she seems to be trying to find me in her sleep. Smiling to myself I go over and sit next to her and softly poke her cheek to wake her. Her ears twitch and she raises slightly with a couple blades of grass sticking to her cheek, seeing me sitting there she crawls lazily and lays her head in my lap before falling back to sleep her tail now wagging softly. 'Well I can tolerate this over being hugged...' I think with a soft smile as I decide to pet her head, her tail responds as one might expect of a happy dog. |
Clarus_NoxJul 1, 2014 9:55 PM
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| AN - finally some development!!! name - Ryan; origins found in Irish history the name means Little King without further ado chapter 5 **** Chapter 5 Looking towards the sky I notice something falling. 'Rain?' As it lands on my hand I realize immediately it's snow. Melting immediately upon touching anything snow begins to fall. 'Now that I think about it, its February now isn't it? But, is this really a dream? I've never been strangled before, so how could I dream of that sensation?' bringing my free hand to my neck I close my eyes to think. 'Even if I somehow emulated it, I wouldn't be feeling the after affects like I am now. But is this really reality? Lamias and wolf girls. Common sense would say this is a dream but it feels too real...' I open my eyes and look at the girl whose head is on my lap. It would appear she and woke up while I was lost in thought and was looking at me with a hint of worry in her eyes. “Does it still hurt?” Realizing I still had my hand on my throat I reassure her, “No it doesn't, little discomfort but nothing painful.” She sits up and stretches her, outfit loose once again. I shift my gaze away as she rights it not seeming to mind much. 'Now what? I need to apologize... but how? Social skills are not one of my strengths.' “Um... thanks for the help with yesterday. And sorry bout your shoulder, I had assumed since you were sleeping on it, it had been fixed.” “Ah about that. How did you do that too me?” she asks as she feels her shoulder as if to make sure there were no residual effects. “Dislocated your shoulder? It rather simple, all it takes is a little leverage. See?” I then dislocate my own shoulder in front of her to show my point. Her eyes widen as if I just took a knife to my arm as she raises her arms to stop me but stops as she doesn't know how this works or how to fix it. “D-doesn't it hurt?” “Used to when it fell out of it's socket but I'm so used to it, it doesn't bother me now.” I wince as I pop it back into place the wolf girl's ears reflecting the worry in her eyes. Unsure of what to do now I stand up and turn to leave to find a town for some information. But before I do I turn back towards the girl.”My name is Ryan. It was nice to meet you.” “Silvia.” ------------ After about 20 minutes of walking along the river and being followed by Silvia I stop and ask, “Are you heading in the same direction?” “No, I'm following you.”, she replies matter of factually. “...You wouldn't be planning to attack me again would you?” “Of course not, I lost. So that makes you my master.” “Ah I see... wait what?” turning on the spot confused I look to her for clarification. “Your my master, you beat me in single's combat fair and square.” “I'm not arrogant enough to not realize that the deciding blow was nothing more than sheer dumb luck. Are you really alright with that?” “It was my choice not to take you as seriously as I should have and that resulted in my own injury to my arm, but by fluke or not I lost by own choices and besides your a lot stronger than what I've heard of the average human so no I do not particularly mind. And on top of it your a good person.” With a self loathing smile I respond, “I'm not as good a person as you think.” “Then how bout a rematch? Loser must comply with a single command of the victor without question. Should you wish I leave I will. To be fair I will give you a full minute to try and best me.” 'A full minute? That's too long, never mind winning. I could easily end her life in 30 secs with no resistance. Why would she give herself such a disadvantage?' “Aren't you going to make your move?” “... No. I'll fight fair and win fair.” With a smile she readies herself for a lunge, “What kind of bad person would choose to do that?” 'And another snap? Se must still be underestimating me. I'll pin her this time instead of evading.' The minute was up and everything happened within ½ a second. Silvia lunged at me and covered the distance almost too fast for me to register. Tackling me to the ground pinning my waist with her body, my shoulders with her hands, and to prove the point of victory, had her fangs at my jugular biting down softly. “hmm?” she bites a little bit harder as if testing something before bringing her face to mine. “Your surprisingly submissive.” I look at her not sure as to what she would be implying when she nips my ear and whispers, “I can feel it getting bigger when I bite you.” Upon hearing that her ears drooped a bit and she replied, “You cheated.” “....hehahahah”, unable to hold it in I begin laughing as Silvia pouted. |
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| Not sure if I buy the "Self-Control" but fun to read. Keep it up. |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
YandereTheEmo said: Not sure if I buy the "Self-Control" but fun to read. Keep it up. next time you have a boner think of things that disgust you and your turn offs you'll find the little guy retreating within a minute |
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| I buy the self control concept...but not when the target is "Easily one of the most beautiful things you've ever seen". Hit that shit. Take notes. Tell us how it went =P Anyway...I needs me some more character development, though things are starting to shape up. I would like to see the MCs reasoning behind turning down such a prize. Sure...my MC was a filthy whore, but even a vow of chastity would be hanging on by a thread in the face of the likely surge of adrenaline coupled with the promise of some hot sexytime. By the rate of your posting I can only assume you're excited about something you've got in mind, since I got screamed at for the same thing =) (though at least you aren't throwing down 6k words at a time) Either way, I'll be following along. Curious to see where this goes. |
| Interesting developments, though I could've done without you measuring yourself :S |
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emeraldtryst said: Anyway...I needs me some more character development, though things are starting to shape up. I would like to see the MCs reasoning behind turning down such a prize. Sure...my MC was a filthy whore, but even a vow of chastity would be hanging on by a thread in the face of the likely surge of adrenaline coupled with the promise of some hot sexytime. simply put im not the type jump at a chance for sex (might be due tot being a virgin) though the reason he made himself limp in this case was because his pride just got shot and she kept teasing, also |
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| AN - im sleepy -.-zZzZ short chapter on to chapter 6~ **** Chapter 6 Having lost the battle but won the war so to speak, Silvia and I continue on our way. According to Silvia, the direction we wee headed was to a territory called Kaori. Upon figuring out I was one the “new humans” Silvia began explaining how the world worked and assured me she wouldn't let any harm become of me. Can't say I was happy to become someone who needed protection, nor did I intend to be one, but I kept that to myself. Shortly after finishing explaining what she knew of the world, which even I could tell was maybe middle school level, Silvia began asking bout my world. “So this cell phone is used for long distance communication by sending signals into the air to another cell phone anywhere in the world that has a connection to the network using.... lightning?” “Yes and no.” Silvia seems to have more interest in science than history as our topic have been more bout machinery than much anything else, “Lightning is made up protons being discharged from the sky when they become too numerous reaching to connect with the neutrons on the ground. While lightning is comprised of electricity its at a much higher strength than a cell phone can handle. The amount of electricity used by a cell phone vs a lightning strike is like comparing a drop of water to that river there.” I said pointing towards the river to our right. “Hmm this seems very complicated...” “I suppose so.” smiling, I continue explaining bout other things from earth as Silvia listens with interest occasionally asking for explanations. The sun now setting I make camp, not much of a camp, just setting a few rocks to make a fire pit and barely managing to get it lit given the supplies. Silvia had gone into the wood to search for some food after making me swear I wouldn't wonder off or pick any fights, but that had been more than ten minutes ago. Shortly after sitting down I hear laughter followed by the sound of clanking metal. Turning towards the sound I see a group of 3 men all wearing armor, one was short and carried what looked like a short bow on his back, while the 2nd was more a normal height with a broadsword at his waist. The 3rd, I wasn't sure if he was actually human, standing at maybe 7 ½ feet tall with a 3 foot thick mace at is waist. Unable to see any discernible features with the lack of light, that was all I could make out. It doesn't take them long to notice me as they saunter over. Upon getting closer I could smell the alcohol on them. Drawing his sword the middle one pointed at me and said, “Leave your gold and valuables and we'll give you a 5 minute head start.” the small one chimes in, “HAHAHA, your too generous Shawn. I say we just end it now.” before even finishing he draws his bow and cocks and arrow aimed for my head. 'Ah shit.' I move to dodge as he fires the arrow but my temple is grazed giving me a fairly nasty gash. In his drunken stupor he slowly process why I'm still standing, when suddenly from behind something rips his head off. The sudden death of their companion seemed to be enough to sober them up as the other two take defensive positions with their weapons. Who it is they were fighting I couldn't tell due to the blood flowing over my eye. As I attempt to clear my vision I see the normal human being pinned to the ground with something over his throat as he flails and screams. Standing over I'm was the giant with his mace raised high as he brought it down without mercy hitting the back of whatever was on top of his companion. Upon impact I heard a yelp, as he brought the club up again and made an underhand swing sending the one attacking flying towards the center of the camp. Even with my obstructed vision I reconsigned the snow white fur and could see the crimson blood staining her. Lumbering over to Silvia, the man raise his mace again. But Silvia swept his feet from under him bout that only proved to bring him to a knee. Without thinking I rush towards the scene and grab him from behind the neck in a strangle hold. 'I could have planned this better.' I thought as I realize this wasn't going to have much of an effect but as he started to try and pry me from his neck Silvia pierced his heart with her claw. Collapsing with an audible thud I move around him to check Silvia's condition, but the first thing she does upon my approach was check my forehead to confirm my condition. Upon confirming it was nothing more than a cut, she collapses in my arms, out cold. |
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| That was rather brutal, though I expect things can only get more fierce after making the decision to head willingly into hell. I have to wonder though...I feel like its unlikely that those fine gentlemen were alone and unclaimed. I guess we'll just see =) |
| Em stole my point but maybe they were claimed, just havin' a bros night out? Bros gettin' killed by hoes? Interesting chapter none the less, we don't typically see the MGs asking too much about our world, we focus more on our world. How would you explain half of the things we take for granted in our world to someone who has never seen even the rudimentary essentials? It's always a nice perspective and change of pace, so nice touch ^^ |
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| due to plot purposes and spoilers i refuse to give out i can not answer the question bout who those 3 men were but i can say in a couple of chapters (2-4 depending on length of each) who these guys were will show a bit more relevance (plot has been run by Su just FYI ) |
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| AN - Silvia is injured, is it serious? what will our dashing hero do now? random name - Iva; from Slavic origins the name means willow tree without further ado chapter 7~ ***** Chapter 7 Gently laying Silvia down I move to the spring to wash the blood from my eyes and using a handkerchief I got from my grandfather wrap the wound to stifle anymore bleeding. Moving back to Silvia I check her over to gauge how bad her wounds are but there was too much blood and I couldn't tell if any of it was hers. Picking her up 'princess style' I decide to move further up river for an area better suited for dressing wounds, if only just. Swallowing my embarrassment and libido I undress Silvia and set her in the shallow end of the river and begin to clean the blood from her body, deciding to be safe I give her a full cleaning like I used to with my mom when she was too ill to get out of bed. After drying Silvia, I move her onto the bank and proceed to wash er clothes and then start a fire to dry them and keep her warm. From what I could tell there were no external open wounds but I was certain there would be some internal damage. 'I'll have to wait for day time to properly check.' Placing the back of my hand to her chest and forehead, I confirm she isn't running a fever at the moment. 'I'll check again in a few hours.' With that thought I drift off to a light sleep while sitting up next to Silvia, counting on my internal clock to wake me around the time I wanted. *** Slowly opening my eyes, I notice the fire had gone out but judging on the embers probably only just recently. I gather more dry wood and leaves to rekindle the flames. As I look up at the moon, I see its at it's peak and estimate the time to be around 1 -2 am. Placing the back of my hands on Silvia's chest and forehead I find to my relieve she still doesn't have a fever. Going back to sleep I feel more convinced that her injuries are not too serious. *** The next morning I wake moments before Silvia. “You feeling alright?” “Yeah just a little sore...” she says but her wince in pain leads me to believe otherwise. Helping her up I decide to check for broken bones. Flinching every now and then from the pain Silvia inquiries, “What are you doing?” “Checking for any breaks. But there doesn't seem to be anything I can detect with just my hands.” As Silvia starts to get dressed I try to help her, “I'm fine really.” “Really?” “Really.” I pat her back to prove a point and see her response, which was to freeze up on the spot. “You need your rest, so get on.” kneeling in front of her I coax Silvia onto my back and proceed to carry her as we head off back in the direction we were heading. 'Those bandits were drunk and aimlessly walking around, there should be a town near by otherwise they wouldn't have left their camp.' clinging to that rationalization I continue on. After a few hours, much to my relief we come by a small town. Stopping the first person I see, I ask about a healer in the town and get directions to a house to the west edge of town. Silvia had fallen asleep on back at some point when I wasn't looking as we reached the destined house. I knock on the door and as I wait for an answer I look around. The front yard had a multitude of various plants, not that I had any knowledge in botany, but I could tell some of the plants were not exactly safe. Some even looked carnivorous. “Impressed?” said a voice in front of me. I didn't even notice the door open. But now standing in front of me was a slightly short girl, she wore what looked like overalls or some kind of gardening clothes and nothing under it from what I could tell. She couldn't be more than 14 years of age. “Um I was told that there would be someone here I could ask to help her,” motioning towards Silvia as I continue talking, “are your parents home by any chance?” Examining Silvia from her spot, the little girl looks back to me and says with an oddly mature smile, “I'll take you thinking I'm but a child as a compliment, but make no mistake, I'm much older than you boy. Bring her in we'll talk more after you lie the werewolf down.” “R-right.” following the girl(?) I place Silvia on a bed and explain the details of the previous night's events. As I do so the girl examines Silvia's body. Occasionally glancing at me, she finishes her examination. And turns to me with a dead serious calculative expression. “The procedure will cost 836,050 gold, but I think it might be possible to save her life.” “W-what do you mean... save her life? Is it that bad?” |
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| Whoo, at least the cost didn't break a million. But there are always other ways to pay such costs. *hands you a pamphlet* Do you have 15 minutes to hear about all the benefits of being in the Alnor Prostitutes Union? More seriously though, I wasn't trying to squeeze any plot out of you by guessing about those guys...was just musing out loud. =) |
| this union do they accept employees without previous work history? |
|
Clarus_Nox said: this union do they accept employees without previous work history? Hells yeah, I'm not sure what the going rate on that special first time might be, but a RL woman here sold hers for like $780,000...puts you right within striking distance there. I don't see why a male on MG island couldn't fetch that much gold from a well-advertised auction =P |
| wait you said Alnor? f*ck we closer to Zarom |
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| AN - short chapter!!!!... really short :T chapter 8~ **** Chapter 8 My mind racing now I try to rationalize the situation. 'There were no symptoms.' No external ones, my medical skills are all 2nd hand. 'I didn't see any internal bleeding.' Can I really tell the difference between simple bruises and internal bleeding? 'Is this a scam?' What if its not? 'She's just injured a little, right?' But she said it was fatal. For every rationalization I tried to make, I quickly produced a counter argument to make me doubt myself. “I... we don't have that kind of money...” I say defeatedly, “Is.. is there anything else I can do to pay?” “Look kid, medicine isn't cheap nor are the materials easy to find. Just because the flower I need is found around here doesn't make it easy to obtain. Even a small one would cost over 1 million to purchase.” “Where?” “Where what?” “Where can I find this flower? You just said it can be found around here. I'll get it for you.” Releasing a sigh the girl explains, “That's all fine and dandy kid, but they are not that easy to get. You would most likely die just by getting close to one.” “Don't underestimate me. Where?” my tone as calm and serious as I can maintain I demand the information. 'Why am I even doing this? I barely know Silvia... but still I can't just leave her like this.' “The area north of here. Here's what the flower will look like.” pulling out a book she shows me an picture of some exotic looking flower with bright peach colored petals with dark orchid purple lines down the middle of each. There were 3 petals each bout the size of my hand based on the scale. “This is a fully grown one, but finding one is probably not gonna happen. But they all look the same whether big or smaller so that shouldn't matter too much.” Heading out in search of the flower I make my way north to the area the girl said. Searching was not gonna be easy. And after searching for what was maybe 7 hours, I found it. Or at least it looked like it. The flower was maybe 15 feet away when I saw it. I take a few steps toward the flower when suddenly the ground beneath my foot gives way. The next thing I know I'm falling.... and then I stop, unconscious. |
Clarus_NoxJul 9, 2014 1:12 AM
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| euthanasia! Sorry kid, but we're just gonna have to put 'er down. Sorry old yellar.. :P |
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| AN - Silvia in critical condition! Ryan fallen unconscious in a pit! What shall happen next!? Will things get worse!? Will they get better!? Or will nothing happen? I ain't telling read if you want to know :P Name - Ione pronounced as eye-on; with Greek origins the name means violet flower without further ado chapter 9~ ***** Chapter 9 With a groan I push myself off the ground. Taking in my surroundings I find myself in some dimly lit cavern. The walls lined with covered lanterns provide small amounts of light showing this area was in use by someone. As I bring myself to my feet I nearly fall back under as pain surges up my left leg. 'Great a sprain...' I sigh to myself as I try to shift my weight to my right foot. The cavern seems void of life despite the apparent evidence. As I make the first turn I find myself in an area with doors lining the walls. Most of the doors had only empty rooms behind them, others weapons, food, and merchandise. Just as I'm bout to give up on the thought of finding someone I find a room that looks more like a prison hall than storage. Walking down hall, I find that each cage is empty, until I reach the last one. Laying on the floor was something I couldn't describe. It didn't appear to be moving and the door was ajar slightly. Carefully I open the door the rest of the way and approach cautiously. No reaction. No response. But it is raising and falling lightly as though breathing. Kneeling next to the thing, I touch it. The feeling was extremely soft and felt like feathers. Then it moved, as it sat up with a sleepy look, I saw it was a girl with wings. With a gasp, the moment she registered my presence, she immediately backed up as far as she could against the wall cowering with terrible fear and tears in her eyes. Even in the poor lighting I could tell she was without any clothes, covered in a fair amount of dirt, and around her neck was a iron collar chained to the wall. “It's ok, I won't hurt you.” I say as I reach my hand out to try to help her up, forgetting the 1st rule when dealing with an injured animal. Don't corner them. As I reach my hand out, the girl's expression because even more fearful and swings in desperation. Her talons catch my forearm, almost ripping it open. But instead of trying to seem dangerous to scare me away, the moment she realized what she did, she goes into a fetal position as if expecting to be beat. I've seen more than my share of abused animals and kids but nothing that had results this obvious. 'I need to get her out of here.' getting on my knees and leaning downward with my palms out and turned upright, I remain still until she looks at me. After a few moments she sees me, thankfully her animal instinct was still intact enough for her to recognize what my position meant, but that didn't mean I could approach her yet. Lifting my head slightly I speak as softly and gently as I could, “I want to help you, can I remove that collar from your neck?” Nodding she gives me the approval but the fear is still plenty evident in her posture. Carefully approaching to not frighten her more than necessary, I inspect the collar. Flinching at my movements, I try to be as gentle as possible. 'I won't be removing this with out a key.' I move away slowly and tell her I'm going to look for a key when we hear heavy footsteps enter the hall. Immediately the girl goes into shock and curls up into a ball terrified. Seeing this I only get angry. “Hey who are you? You any idea where you trespassing kid!?” a fat man holding a torch addressed me but he soon took notice of the girl behind me cowering. “Hey, you didn't touch my merchandise huh? Sorry kid, gotta buy it before you can play with it. Your trespassing in a Hunter base. If your not here to purchase then get out before I decide to get rough with ya.” “Merchandise?” Rage, pure rage. That was all I felt from seeing this man after he spoke. “Yes, MY MERCHANDISE! If you ain't interested in buying then get lost. This is your final warning.” 'Sprained ankle, gashed right forearm.' Normally I wouldn't pick a fight with such injuries, but I couldn't stop myself from looking around to find something to my advantage. “Hey, you listening?!” taking a couple steps forward to try to be intimidating I notice a metallic sound. Looking at his waist I see a ring of keys. Then next thing I know I get hit from my left as he sends me to the ground landing on my injured arm and my head hits an unused chain. The man then steps on my chest with a look of superiority and puts most of his weight down on me. “Should really listen to people bigger than you kid.” I then kick his shin as hard as I can with my good leg. Somehow working he was brought to a knee and relieving the pressure from my chest rolling to my feet I grab the nearby chain and wrap it around the fat man's neck and wait for him to stop struggling. Thirty seconds and his struggling becomes weak. Sixty seconds and his arms go limp. Ninety seconds and his gasping ceases. I then release him but don't loosen the chains and he falls face first. Taking his keys, I return to the girl and remove the collar. “Can you walk?” Shaking from fear she doesn't respond. And not wanting to risk more of them showing up I decide to scope her up in my arms. Still trembling she clings to my shirt as I carry her through the twisting halls. Eventually finding a room with stairs, I proceed to cross towards what could be an exit before stopping as something catches my eye. I see on a pile of unsorted item a item I was all too familiar with. An Odachi. Setting down the girl and assuring her I'd be right back I move to inspect the weapon. Pulling it from it's sheathe the blade was in prime condition, even better than the ones I'd purchased on earth. Meaning this was made for actual combat and not decoration. Giving it a few test swings, a nostalgic feeling fills my arm. Re-sheathing the blade, I strap it to the back of my waist. Looking back at the pile to see if there was anything else that could be of use. But nothing appeared to stand out. I turn to go back tot he winged girl when I stop. She was still covered in a lot of dirt and was nude. Turning back hoping to see some clothes at least, I found nothing, but I did manage to find a couple rags. Deciding to clean her of the dirt at least, I pocket them and return to her. Eyeing the sword now at my waist with hesitation I kneel before her, “It's so I can protect you should any more of those people show up. I won't ever hurt you nor let anyone else. I swear it.” gently, I pet her head to try and comfort her. Appearing to have calmed a little, I pick her up again and head up the stairs. Thankfully they truly did lead outside. In the distance I could hear the sounds of a flowing river. Deciding that would be our first destination on our way to the town I begin walking. |
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| Diary entry 154 It's been nearly 80 days... I'm running low on food and water, and I can't seem to keep up with the rapid expansion of chapters. Multiple in a single day are coming out of the woodwork, and I can barely hold them back... Soon I think they may devour me as well... End Post ^ This Don't push out so much in one day... It's draining, my man <3 |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
| but.... inspiration ._. |
|
| Interesting. The main character seems a bit capable, and humans appear to hold a much higher position than is my taste for the MSG, but you seem to have a clear direction in your story. Considering the speed that you're pumping chapters out, the quality of writing is quite good, and pacing is quite on point, though some things blow by kinda quickly. It seems like there is a point in your story you're trying to reach quickly. |
Clarus_Nox said: but.... inspiration ._. I have inspiration--so I just stock up chapters... :/ I wrote a 6.5k word chapter because I felt inspired to do an arc shift. |
| It's natural for a person to deny he's a failure as a human being. That's why he searches for somebody who is more miserable than himself. That's why so much animosity exists on the internet. Those who aren't able to find a more miserable person, turn to the internet and call other people losers, even though they've never met. Just to make themselves feel superior. isn't that pathetic? There's a sense of security that comes from speaking badly of someone else. But that isn't true salvation. — Tatsuhiro Satou YandereTheEmo said: The only thing more pathetic than quoting someone you know nothing about, is quoting yourself. |
YummyLunches said: Considering the speed that you're pumping chapters out, the quality of writing is quite good, and pacing is quite on point, though some things blow by kinda quickly. It seems like there is a point in your story you're trying to reach quickly. yeah I've been planning out the introduction of my companions for last week and want to get it finished to begin the actual plot YummyLunches said: Interesting. The main character seems a bit capable, and humans appear to hold a much higher position than is my taste for the MSG, but you seem to have a clear direction in your story. its not that they have a 'higher position' its just I'm using more humans than most others, don't worry more MGs will appear soon. Everything will fall into place before the end of the story |
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| Read it. here are my comments: |
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| advise acknowledged though I'm still going to post the next couple chapters soon (if i were to consider this an arc, I've been finished with it since bout a week ago and been doing touch ups in my head before typing it out.) my pace will slow down considerably once i get passed the introduction arc. originally it was to be 4-5 chapters long but now its 11-13. |
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| that's fine, there's no real rules against it. You could post a chapter an hour and you'd still be well within the rules lol |
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