If you like colours and explosions and vaguely homo-erotic themes, you've discovered your happy place.
I'm going to call this anime "Bisco" to conserve energy, since watching this practically sapped me of my will to live. Misanthropy, like the rust, feeds on this sense of futility. Has humanity devolved far enough to find such twaddle enjoyable? I suppose that is the theme of this review, post-apocalyptic absurdism is now literary realism. The joke is on us.
Characters 2/10
Bisco himself is cool enough. He's strong and dumb, borderline invincible and emotionally unavailable. The perfect foil for a sensitive "good guy" sidekick. He's a cliché, obviously,
...
but there's nothing wrong with clichés if you can rattle them around enough. Unfortunately there was very little rattling going on here.
Doctor Panda is more of a problem, levelling up from pathetic weakling to giga-chud with very little coaxing. If your anime is only 12 episodes long, best to focus on a tight-ass plot rather than character maturation. Figure out how weak doctor boy becomes essential to the plot and progress from there. He doesn't really need to change, he's already "good".
Big booby rust queen has a cool look, but that's about all. It doesn't really sell the "debilitating power of rust" when a terminally ill g-cup can still whoop anybody's ass.
The lesser characters and the main villain were pretty forgettable. I kind of liked the moonlighting prostitute jack of all trades girl, but she's sidelined fairly early on. I gave this section a 2 since there's really only 2 characters. And neither of them are particularly interesting.
Plot 1/10
Crazy lore for a 12 episode series, suspension of disbelief is required for viewing. Luckily for me (not being anal about rationalism, even in real life) I can accept a world of rust eating mushrooms and gigantic crabs. What I can't accept, however, is a story that relies on piss weak character motivations. If you are going to be absurd, at least have some conviction!
Big Bad is a capitalist, duh, but a nonsensical one. Here's a pop quiz for the young left-leaning readers amongst us: do we suppose that our ideological opponents are maliciously motivated by personal gain? Or are they perhaps misguided in their notion of the "greater good"? Even this bee's dick of nuance is already a cliché at this point. Big Bad wants to spread disease so that he can sell the cure, but simply selling the cure will already make him rich enough for one lifetime. So his motivation must be different then, he must be hoping to control what's left of this society. To what end? To keep the population down for ecological reasons? To prevent a second apocalypse? These would be the "reasons why" a misguided person might mistakenly commit evil. But Big Bad is not misguided, he's just evil. Ok, so does he want to wipe out the human race? No, he just wants to get personally rich... See the loop we are on? He is too evil to be merely motivated by gain, he ultimately has no motive. He exists to give our heroes someone to fight. But do they even have a reason to fight?
Bisco and the old man must cross a border and a city to find the rust eater mushroom. During this crossing they disguise as a new religious sect (which is never mentioned again). So they've crossed the assumedly endless border wall, with a vast dessert around them. Must we suppose the city itself is similarly impassable? Why couldn't they go around? Because they needed to pick up the deuteragonist, obviously! Ok, so Bisco plunges straight through the enemy encampment, losing old man in the process. Earning himself some emotional baggage and an effeminate side kick. Now we have 50 episodes or so of world-building adventures, building up the characters and establishing the lore... wait, none of that happens? They just save some kids and start a bromance? Ok, whatever floats your crab.
Regarding said bromance, the word ham-fisted does not do it justice. Characters decide to like one another so arbitrarily and unconvincingly. Why should doctor boy like prostitute girl? Because she fixed the train? These characters literally just learned each other's names as they say goodbye, adding that they'll never forget each other. Have you ever got to that level of affection before learning someone's name? And why is g-cup suddenly dtf with Bisco? And why does doctor boy physically attack Bisco to prevent him coming to harm?
People accuse Demon Slayer of being dumb, but at least it knows that it's dumb! This series made the mistake of attempting something so far beyond its capabilities. Or maybe it didn't, maybe it was a heartless cash grab from the start. Maybe an AI wrote this plot.
Design 7/10
The reason why I watched Bisco to begin with. It looked cool. Mushrooms are cool, crabs are cool, rusted boobas are cool. But cool is just the packaging. Inside the technicolor wonderland of Bisco resides an amorphous mass of contradictions and clichés (not to mention an FDA approved minimum percentage of human feces). If you scratch the shiny surface even just a little, the surging cry of a missing chromosome will assault your senses. This show is developmentally challenged, falling short of the mark at every turn. But somehow so consistently flawed that it seems to fail organically, as if it was God's mistake for allowing humanity to live this long. This show somehow possesses a Milton-esque level of tragic irony, turning the viewer against existence itself. In the end we take up arms with Satan, pitying his cruel banishment, and march upon the heavens with righteous indignation! Why give us rusty boobas if we aren't given motivation to squeeze? What fresh hell is this?!
Conclusion
Racism.
Jun 5, 2024
Sabikui Bisco
(Anime)
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If you like colours and explosions and vaguely homo-erotic themes, you've discovered your happy place.
I'm going to call this anime "Bisco" to conserve energy, since watching this practically sapped me of my will to live. Misanthropy, like the rust, feeds on this sense of futility. Has humanity devolved far enough to find such twaddle enjoyable? I suppose that is the theme of this review, post-apocalyptic absurdism is now literary realism. The joke is on us. Characters 2/10 Bisco himself is cool enough. He's strong and dumb, borderline invincible and emotionally unavailable. The perfect foil for a sensitive "good guy" sidekick. He's a cliché, obviously, ... May 20, 2023
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