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First, I would like to acknowledge how brave Hilnama was for having the courage to share the intimate details of her experience with such a difficult disease. It takes a certain level of vulnerability to be able to talk about such things for strangers to read about.

This is an autobiography written by a manga author, who was diagnosed with colon cancer at the young age of thirty-eight. She talks about her symptoms at the beginning and how a regular doctor’s visit for stomachache gradually turns out to be much more serious than she initially thought. Throughout the book she is optimistic and the way ... she tells her story is so light-hearted that you can’t help but get hopeful. She talks in detail about her medical journey from the first day, her countless hospital visits and exams, her major surgery, her post-op recovery, and lastly her chemotherapy sessions and their many drawbacks.

As a doctor (an intern) who has been constantly working with patients in different hospitals for a year now, I have met many patients with varying ailments and illnesses, but for some reason, cancer patients have always intrigued me more than most. They always seemed kind and resilient to me. Although it is completely natural to be afraid and anxious or even angry when faced with reality in these cases especially when you are told you don’t have much longer to live or have to deal with the decreased quality of life due to such disease.

Being with patients almost every day has led me to sometimes be indifferent when it comes to the emotional aspects of having a chronic illness (empathy fatigue is very common in such a profession), so this book provided me with a wider perspective as well as aiding as a reminder for me to always be caring and considerate of my patients and their needs so for that I am truly thankful.

I was so sad to find out after reading the manga that the author passed away in December of last year. May her soul rest in peace.

I decided to review this manga because I liked the concept and the story. And reading it made me feel certain things.

(No spoilers, I’m just writing about my thoughts).

I’m always down for a good thriller, and this one just had the right balance of darkness, unpleasantness, hope, melancholy, and psychological rot. I might have liked it slightly more than necessary.
It ponders philosophical questions and explores the consequences of our actions.

The story is about a guy named Yuusuke, it starts with him in high school, he’s initially introduced as a typical teenager who’s friendly and outgoing, living a normal life, except for one thing; ... he doesn’t remember his past at all. The story turns around when he gets confronted by someone from his past, who claims they’ve been hurt by him and that he’s a devil in human flesh.

The story is composed of two parts and an epilogue. I got rapidly invested in the first part which is basically a warm-up for the second act.

First I want to start by saying this is dark stuff. It contains depictions of sexual assault (involving minors), bullying, blackmail, physical violence, and torture. It’s very disturbing.
The ongoing theme is redemption and second chances. It shows us that morality is a complex concept and examines what or who defines “right” & “wrong”. (In my case, I believe it’s society who gets to decide that most of the time).

It also raises various questions about what makes up a person. Is it their appearance, actions, environment, experiences, or is it all of those? What if a person were to lose all memory of who they were and became an empty shell of all their past self? Would you still hold them accountable for their previous crimes and misdeeds? And on what basis would you condemn them if they were genuinely changed?

And most importantly, what counts as punishment, or rather punishment ENOUGH.
How would you exactly go on about getting even with someone (if you had the chance). The answer is that it’s different for everybody. Each person has their way of dealing with trauma.

The subject is complicated but the author does a great job of portraying the turbulent mental state and the struggle that the characters go through. The whole victim/perpetrator dynamic was very emotionally charged. I couldn’t get enough of their interactions because I was genuinely invested. There were so many layers to be uncovered.

The art is unique. It’s generally soft yet it can have a cutting edge when needed.
I especially loved the moments it changed from the usual art style to a somewhat simpler whole-page drawing when it came to special moments. It strangely intensified the atmosphere. I liked the smooth transitions and alluded symbolisms.

So if you are into psychological thrillers, then I suggest you try this one too. It also reminded me a bit of Hone ga Kusaru made.



(Minor spoilers)

Cats save lives. It’s a fact.

Now something I didn’t like.. I know the world is vast and middle schoolers can be mean. It isn’t entirely unplausible, but it still bothered me. Age 13-14 is a little too young for this level of evil. Or maybe not? Even babies are innocently cruel sometimes.

Regarding that ending, I thought it was befitting, to say the least. But it also left me feeling hollow.

It’s also true that sometimes the worst punishment for a criminal is to keep living on under the burden of their guilt. (If they have a conscience that is).

“My brain is different” is a collection of stories about nine adults with developmental disorders (mostly ADHD and ASD) illustrated by an author who struggles with ADHD. After finding out about her condition at a late age, she decides to try and communicate these stories from real individuals to us in the hope of shedding a light on the hardships that neurodivergent people encounter in our predominantly neurotypical society. These range from bullying to work related issues, interpersonal conflicts, communication problems, harassment, discrimination, familial disputes, and many more. Despite the seriousness of some of these situations (i.e. suicidal ideations, physical violence..), it’s delivered mildly without ... lingering too much on details.
It’s told in a very straightforward way from each character’s point of view.
And it’s really easy to sympathize with them. The art is very clean and simple. It’s far from comprehensive but it’s definitely better than nothing. I really recommend reading it. Took me two hours to complete it if I remember correctly.

This one reminded me of Adventure Time, probably because of the whole post-apocalyptic and “last human on earth” vibes but that’s not all about it.
It was a really immersive experience. It’s got an entrancing set of characters each more unique than the last. It’s light and uplifting most of the time but be warned cause it’s got a few bone-chilling moments.
I found Rojica and Rakka’s parent/friend relationship so wholesome and refreshing. I would have loved for it to have delved deeper into the the past and I think it could have been longer but I’m okay with what it is anyway since the ... ending felt natural. Although it wasn’t an “ending” per se cause there isn’t a linear plot. And lastly, I loved the simple art style, it felt so befitting of the general mood.

The Teacher’s White Lie.. more like “The One where Everyone Keeps Lying to Themselves and their Surroundings”

Okay, let me be honest, unhappy stories where everyone is miserable is my thing. But only when it’s like that for a good reason. However, in this case there is an overall air of “everything sucks and we’re all doomed to repeat our mistakes“. I did not feel anything reading this. Except for the hatred I developed for each character. I despised them all. No one’s motives/actions make any real sense and it’s all a bunch of BS to me. I don’t mind when things are left to the ... audience to interpret but this manga literally doesn’t make sense. If I’m being fair, I don’t know how things work in Japan. Although I’ve read a good share of manga to know that this isn’t it.
Moving forward, I felt so much contradiction. It’s so preachy and annoying and I honestly couldn’t stand it. The only reason I was able to finish it was because I have this urge to go through to the end with everything I start.

[spoilers ahead]

I had so many unanswered questions and the one that bothered me most was who in the hell was that Misato (the worst female character I’ve come upon btw) and why was she changing her mind every 5 minutes. Nothing she ever did was explained and we never got to know what was the deal with her weird brother.

Things aren’t black and white like this makes it out to be. And what was the message again? “Women are destined to be taken advantage of by men??” “The only way to overcome sexual trauma is to sleep with someone you like?” Or was it “If your husband is cheating on you, then it’s a good time to get pregnant??” Literally F all that. I’m hoping the author did not intend for that kind of thing and she only has a bad way of presenting her ideas.

And if you want me to get started on the plot, well, thank god there isn’t even one.
The only redeeming feature was the art, and even that was mediocre at best.

Another book from Nagata Kabi. This time it’s main focus is about yearning for love and marriage. Although not as impactful as the first or second book, I still found it relatable on so many levels. And that’s to be expected considering all human beings share the same basic needs.
Aside from the desperate longing, there was some discourse in regard to gender identity and sexuality but it barely scratched the surface.

When comparing her mentality and self-preservation to the previous works, I felt she has moved forward and is finally on the way to learn the joy of self-love. And I think that’s great. ...
I myself, have been in a really dark place a long time ago but I managed to get out of it thanks to my family and my own desire to take back control so I know how hard it is to get out of that vicious cycle of self-hatred and hopelessness towards other people.

I’ve so far refrained from rating her works since to be honest, it doesn’t feel right for me to rate another person’s “real” thoughts and experiences of the world and since it’s told in such a straightforward way I feel it’s almost impossible not to sympathize with her. But it seems like MAL is forcing me to do it this time. So that’s that.

I see that she has another project on the way although it’s currently on hiatus. I’ll be looking forward to any future works by her and I truly hope she finds her inner peace soon.

"It was a horror that a single screamed word of their voices had survived, echoing through unthinkable time, distorted, and mocked, and mocking; Takeli-li! Takeli-li!"

At the Mountains of Madness is my first dose of H.P. Lovecraft's cosmic horror, and I am now hooked. If I had to describe this manga in one word, it would be; fantastically weird. But wait, that's two words.. oh well.

The story is about a team of scientists going on an expedition in Antarctica. But as you correctly guessed, everything goes terribly wrong when they find some ancient "specimens". In the beginning, I found it a bit slow, and it ... was kinda hard to follow the story. But I got used to it soon enough.

The characters were a bit bland, like they were only there for the sake of the story, and I didn't feel their spirit, and the art made it difficult to tell them apart. Aside from that, Gou Tanabe's two-page spreads were so amazing at times, especially toward the end.

I haven't read the book, so I can't say if it's better, but I have a feeling it can't be much better than this.

I don't know where to start so I'm going to use the outdated systematic way of approaching this. It's going to be spoiler-free, well for the most part.

First of all, the story: 6/10
I first found this manga in 2015, the premise looked very interesting to me; a prestigious school full of elites where rich horny girls dominate guys... I did not read it at that time because it wasn't completed but I found it on a website a while ago and it's licensed by Kodansha. It was pretty good in the beginning, I'm a sucker for fake-dating and angst so I was easily hooked. Buuuut, ... things don't stay too well for too long. Soon it's flooded by annoying characters and filled with stupid misunderstandings. Not that I mind that (since that's what most shoujo is about, love triangles and misunderstandings). Another thing that annoyed me was that literally, nothing makes sense about how things work at their school. I don't understand how absurd rules like that could come to without anyone stepping in, aren't there any sane people left? What are the teachers doing and why does the STUDENT COUNSEL hold so much power yet chooses to do absolutely nothing?! To be fair, taking into account other anime and manga, I can turn a blind eye to that point. And if I think about Boys Over Flowers then this might not that weird after all.

Art: 6/10
The art isn't the best or anything, but it's not bad either. I especially liked the stupid faces that the MC would make, reminds me of Heroine Shikkakku (which is way better than this).

Character: 5/10
Now, here's the worst thing about this manga: THE GUYS. They are so problematic. They're mostly douchbags and know not how to act accordingly. No respect for personal space or the MC. One guy went all the way with a girl when she was DRUGGED just cause they were going out, and they didn't even address it properly later! Excuse you?? That really sets a bad example.
On the other hand, the main girl's character is fine but although she is supposed to be smart she's surprisingly dense.

Enjoyment: 7/10
Well, what can I say? I'm a sucker for shoujo of any kind, even if it's bad. Despite all the shortcomings, this was a fun read.

Overall: 6.5/10
It's an average manga, don't expect much from it. If you have some time to spare and you're in the mood for a typical shoujo then go for it. But there are so many manga better than this.

The story is all over the place and only comes together at the last two volumes or so. That doesn’t mean it’s badly written, it’s just that i personally like a plot that follows a straight line, i do not mind some flashbacks from time to time, i wouldn’t even mind the story jumping around between the past and the present if it wasn’t so much to the point that made following the story so annoying. But i feel it was done as if to hide the plot holes because whenever things got interesting the story would just jump into the past or try to ... retell something that we already knew and later when it picked up where it left some things were left unexplained and i think THAT is poor writing. Imagine one moment it feels like everything is falling into place and the story is finally moving forward and you go to the next chapter just to find it’s back 30 chapters to tell something you don’t care about anymore. That is no fun and it diminishes the enjoyment for me.
I also noticed that some dialogues were repeated a lot throughout the series with the only difference being one or two new sentences or scenes every time. What a waste. Also yeah, Lots and LOTS of dialogue, i think it would be much better if this was a light novel instead.
I felt like the author desperately tried to lengthen the story but it just made it unbearably slow and dull. Which resulted in many unnecessary chapters that really add nothing. Author herself admits volume 7 is a side story so not reading it doesn’t change anything. It could have been a 5 volume manga and it would be better than 12 where the story gets dragged for so long. You might think that those “extra” chapters might be important and can add depth to the characters but not when i don’t like of the characters!. That’s right, i only liked the Mad Hatter (only until midway) but i couldn’t stand the rest. Couldn’t sympathize with them. Their reasoning and motives aren’t well explained and they lack development. Except for the cat, though he’s just a cat so it doesn’t count.
It should have been called Alice in the madhouse because they’re all crazy and it shows.

Bottom line is; i read this for the sake of finishing it because I’ve put it on hold for 4 years, otherwise i would have dropped it after the sixth volume when the story got stuck. Also maybe I’m being biased because i never liked the story of Alice in Wonderland in the first place since i was little so there’s that.

The art for one thing, is not bad but i do not feel anything about it. Truthfully, the first time i saw this i thought it was a BL or something but it wasn’t. What a disappointment.
Another thing I’d like to say is that i think manga is better when drawn by the same person who comes up with the story. This was originally a CD drama so i do not know what that is about but i always prefer the original source material rather than adaptions or remakes.
The only reason i was able to finish this was because i started to read it in a funny voice out loud so yeah, hearing my own voice was more amusing to me than the actual story.

Although i said all that i will give this work a 6/10 because i feel it’s slightly better than some other manga adaptations, and i think some effort was put into it. And it’s my own fault for being so stubborn and wanting to read something i didn’t like from the beginning. It’s just that it wasn’t my cup of tea. Albeit i would love to have some tea with Lewis Carroll.

(Spoilers)

I started this manga expecting something good and well? Was it? No.
I have read Akaiito and I remember I enjoyed it a lot more than this, at that time 10 manbun was still ongoing and I remember I was really looking forward to seeing any developments between Ren and Rino and so I was very eager to start reading this. A few days ago I checked up on it and I saw it was completed like a year ago so I immediately started reading it. The first few chapters were fine and i was looking forward to what was going to happen (even though it ... was pretty obvious), so they start going out and that is okay but then she suddenly started having problems with her movements and it turns out she has ALS (a disease of the nervous system- the one Stephen Hawking had although his was more progressive) anyway back to Rino, to be honest her having the disease made me very excited and I started having higher expectations because I like tragedy/romance combination. BUT things started going downhill very soon after. Things started to become boring. I was expecting more of a realistic demonstration of the life of a girl with ALS but it was just pink and rainbows and suddenly it’s just a mediocre shoujo again. It got dragged for too long too. And it felt like such a waste that we never got to see things get difficult. I tried so hard to feel anything but I couldn’t.