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*English is not my first language! Review will be edited... eventually! Maybe...*

Violet Evergarden is truly a beautiful piece of work - no one can deny that. Colors are vibrant, the animation is like satin to my eyes and the music complements the visuals, working with the picture rather than against it.

Those were the good parts.

Rest of this lush and vibrant garden is... mostly covered in soot and soil.

Meaning, of course, that all the other elements weren't even slightly on the par with the good aspects of the show - the art and the music. Nothing particularly terrible, mind you, but... I really don't ... care about the art, nor the music. I want the story to be perfect! I want the characters to have that 'wow'- effect, that glues me in, and doesn't let me go! I want to devour every minute of every single episode, and weep in a need for more!

Like I said, Violet Evergarden is beautiful... but it doesn't have that 'wow'- effect on me, being almost too beautiful, for the most parts. When the characters are crying, I see no pain. When they are sad, I feel no despair. The ugliest parts of human feelings and emotions are almost so beautifully presented, that it's just... not credible. I can't truly see the feelings, nor the emotions in their full scale... just beauty. And ironic as it is, given the inner core of the story - learning of having feelings, and expressing them - it becomes quite dulling, especially in the last four episodes.

The story - short, simple, formulaic and cliche in every possible way - is decent. It's nothing out of the ordinary, and neither are the characters. Main character learns feelings by writing down what those around her are feeling, thus "earning" herself salvation from her past - not bad, but seen and done before. We have aour ptotective Senpais, angry brother in mourning, supportive cast of nameless faces that I for the death of me cannot name but maybe one (Iris?), and those who write/receive a letter, and never appear in a story ever again. Nothing deep, complex, or something that I haven't already seen, but... I still didn't hate it. Both the story, and the characters are exactly what they need to be, and nothing more. Is it a bad thing? Not... necessarily. Am I still bothered by it? Absolutely.

The biggest problem for me in the show was that whole auto-memoir Doll - business, that I just found really, really... stupid. Unnecessary. Meaningless, even. It would be logical to have a profession for letter-writing in a world, where people were either illiterate, or if the letters somehow possessed some kind of special magic, that only the certain someones could either handle, see, touch, or read. As far as I could see, neither were the case. The only time when having a professional letter-writer around made any kind of sence, was when they were trying to court princess and a prince from two separate kingdoms through artificial love letters, but that was the only time! The show glorifies the letters almost to the point where the letters are the most priceless posessions that a person can have, and professionals writing those letters are the best people there are, but... anyone in the world can write a letter! The show even says it!

"Just write the feelings, that are in your heart."

You don't need a profession to do that!

This seems to be actually a pattern that I've come across from time to time. Aria. Bartender. Food Wars. And now, this. Shows where a one certain profession - in this case... ehm, slightly romanticized secretary - gets placed in a pedestal, and the whole 12-episodes long running time is used by telling just how awesome it is to be rowing a condola, mixing drinks or... writing letters. It gets really tedious and really annoying really quickly to be constantly told that "the bartenders this" and "the bartender is that", "precious memories inside a lovely letters" and all that sappy nonesence, and during this 13-episodes long show I was just constantly shouting to the screen

"Just wait for the day when all these people will learn how to put their own damn feelings into words - you'll be out of jobs in no time!"

So... yeah. Maybe I am a bit too cynical for these sort of shows? Overall, I still would easily recommend Violet Evergarden for its lush artwork that is in on itself a treat to behold. Although seeing this show receive so many 10-ratings hurts my little elitistic heart, I am all the same at peace knowing that the beauty of the simplicity prevailed.

Story: 4
Art: 10
Sound: 8
Character: 4
Enjoyment: 5
Overall: 6

*English is not my first language! Review will be edited... eventually!*

So, yeah... Food Wars was a total wreck! Tasty wreck, but a wreck, nontherless!

Like many others before me, I honestly cannot say, nor comprehend, why oh why this has such a high ranking! Or rather... I do understand, since I gave it above average-rating, but I'd like to think myself as better than a mind that gets so easily entertained.

One can dream...

And entertained I was! Shokugeki no Souma was - at the very least - entertaining! There's food, and there's boobies - all the goodnes in the world combined!

No, but honestly... I really ... did like core consept of this anime - food, chef vs chef, and the brainwork, talent and effort behing every single spoonful! Unfortunately... the core of the show, was just as bare, as were those who ate the said food - lucky bastards!


Story: 3


The story of the SnS ended, before it even started! The consept, the basic idea, was introduced to us in the very early on - as it should be - and there was even some kind of conflict happening in there... somewhere, before it kinda lost itself into... itself.

A young boy, only son of a legendary chef and a talented one himself, gets - forced by his absent father, through neglection - to attend this best-of-the-absolute-best cooking school, where only the selected view gets to even spend the first night, before permanent life-long elimination, and only a handful will graduate in the end! Powered by the desire to finaly succeed his father, both in talent, passion and in skill, the boy-what's-his-face, finds himself as an immediate underdog, and an irritatingly talented blockhead, who angers some blond bitch for some reason, angers the entire school against him for no reason, and... spoiler-ish?! But wait! The Sequel!!

Yeah, so... the story isn't obviously finished yet, due to the second season and all, but... is it still worth the rating it gets?

No. Not by a mile stone!

It was pretty obvious to see very early on, to whom this show was originally aimed for, and that the story itself didn't spend even nearly so much time on a writing desk, than the cells of the bouncing boobies, buttocks and steaming bowls of deliciousness. For young boys, this show is ideal, since the plot is actually bigger, than the actual story - fight with food - and not much brainpower is needed to understand, what is happening, and how much jelly those ladies have in their massive, underaged bosoms!

Like I said before, the story of a SnS isn't really a "story" per say, rather than a core-consept, that just keeps moving forward - not up, or down... just forward. No matter how many efforts this show takes trying to put something satisfactory on the table, the overall tone of the show is really monotonic, full of repeated gimics, traits and gags, and if I would be reviewing this anime, based entirely upon just the story alone, I would waste no time to rip this sucker a new one! The story was there, in the beginning... all the nescessary ingredients were there, ready to be used, but, in the end, there were just too many, or not at all... and none of them used properly, in the end!

It was like a mediocre-buffet- table, with no order, nor clear picture of what it was actually trying to be, to appeal the hungry eye. Is it fancy? Is it tacky? Is it comfort? Is it even worth the risk? Who knows - it's a mystery-buffet!

Characters' motivations... the consept, the idea of a plot... characters developing by actions and enviroments... backstories, defeats and triumphs... Those are all ingredients that the SnS uses, more or less. Those should make a average to decent story on their own, but... something is still missing.

Where's the conflict? Where's the goal? Where's the direction?

It all feels... rather empty, by heart. In the end, story of the show is just what the name suggests. Food Wars - battles with food... and nothing more! Maybe nothing more is needed, but still... I was left feeling of wanting more.


Art: 9


Boobs do not jiggle like that!
Good food does not melt off the clothes!
Is it really nescessary to be able to see that... that pubic bone-bump, that you can see, peeking between the legs, when girls are wearing pants?
What drugs are these people on?!

So... those are just some of my favourite pet peeves, while watching the show. The colors are vibrant and powerful, and the art alone really does illustrate the taste of the foods relatively well. Too bad for some, that there will be some naked skin, occasionally... In every episode... Expecially lady-skin... And some tentacles...

Yes, the art is lewd. And I loved it! Deal with it!


Sound: 6


I can swear I heard some of my favourite hentai-VA's in there, somewhere...!


Character: 4


And here is where the bad taste starts for me.

All the characters were mediocre, at best, and unbearably implausible, at worst! I can get behind a fifteen-year-old boy, who knows atleast something about high-class cooking, given his roots and his upbringing, but give me this tsundere-blond-bitch... naturally born girl with a "God Tongue", or a boy with a super nose, and I will literally scream you out of this planet!

Maybe I shouldn't be so harsh against gimicks that'll keep the show even mildly entertaining and/or interesting - because the "story" sure as Hell doesn't do it for me! - but sorry-not-sorry, I am!

These people aren't really people, more than they are just some hilariously implausible tropes or gimicks, and that's almost the very same problem that plagued the "story", almost from the very beginning! Yes, all the characters are unique, but almost none of them really stand out for me! They're really just a over-grown, grey, lumpy mess, with little actual individualism! I literally cannot name, nor remember any of the characters on their own, based upon their personalities, traits or motivations... just some jiggly boobs, and the "things" they did! That's it! It's all just... this weird blur of actions, but very little or no characters attached to them! Maybe, this is just my own problem, but, to me, it's a hellawa big one!

The characters aren't deep, nor complex - just "good" enough... collections of some comon anime-traits, some "new" gimicks and some "bouncy bouncy" nudity. None of them are nothing that I haven't already seen on some other shows, and only a selected view of them we get to see actually developing, while the... "story" progresses. Any development, that does happen, is still... relatively plausible and passable in my books, if not so masterly executed, but... given that the whole idea of the show was just to entertain us with some awesomely implausible food battles, the characterization and the charater development are doomed to be left in the shadows - in a role of the spices, not the main course.

Prehaps, I will be proven wrong on the next season... Who knows...


Enjoyment: 8


Despite all the major, major flaws this show has, I still really liked it. I liked the vibrant and powerful visuals, and the battles were entertaining, as to be expected. Even though everything else was rotten, the core - although still very bare-boned and simple - was that strong-enough hook, that kept me with the show from the beginning, to the bitter end, with no intention to ever drop it, or put it on the hold, for some other titles. That alone should be a accomplishment!

Sadly, the entertainment-value is higly a subjective matter. I have nothing against nudity, so if you're a prude of any kind, you should already be well aware that you won't nescessarily find any worth watching from SnS! There are no great plotlines, no big conflicts, and very little actual heart-to-heart- moments for the romantics - harem-fans, be damned! Only some over the top, OP wanna-be-chefs, making food and measuring each others dinguses, and very little anything more. If the subject of the food wouldn't be so intriguing to me, I would've ended up passionately hating this anime for ever existing, so... the Enjoyment-rating was in the end just a lucky fluke for me.

Food Wars! is stupid... it's shallow, and it's riddiculously over-the-top, but that's also it's appeal - mindless fun, strong visuals, and some imaginative cooking. Expect absolutely nothing more, and you'll leave satisfyed.


Overall: 6


Nothing great, but fine, if you're not looking much in the first place. The art was nice to look at - colorful, vivid, and lewd - and the enjoyment-value is subjectively speaking uncanny, so... give it a shot, and see yourself, what you think of it.

There's always the season two, and even that seems to - so far- hold some relatively impressive rankings, so... better luck on next time, eh?

*English is not my first language! The review will be edited... eventually! May contain spoilers!*

Gay-bait.

That was literaly the first thing, that came up in my mind, when I read the premise of the show - gay-bait! Lots of skinny, girly-looking boys, pretty music and sexy accents... no wonder this still holds rating over eight!

That being said... I can't believe that I have to say this... I have absolutely nothing against gays! I'm one myself, goddamit!

So... did I hate Yuri on Ice? No. Did I liked it? No... but I didn't hate it either! It's just not... that good as Fandom makes it out to be, ... and let me tell you my version, why that is.


Story (4)

Okay, so... lets be honest here! How many of us did actually see this anime, because of its story?! Not me, that's for sure! If you'd tkae away the ever-so-obvious yaoi-aspect out of the story, what would be left besides that? Some generic underdog-story, about ice skating! And I use the word "generic", as a praise!

The boy sucks at what he does - he feels bad. He meets someone, willing to help him - he feels better. The mentor and the pupil fall in love... somehow - boy sucks... little bit less, and is now happy.

Like I said... generic underdog-story, with a splash of romance here and there... because horny teens need their ships.

The story isn't anything new, nor does it bring anything new to the table - gay-relationships in sports isn't anything new! It's not deep, nor does it try to bring up something entirely unexpected, or challenging to the viewer - it's just nice little hurt/comfort- one-shot with ice skating attached to it, and that's pretty much about it. Yet, it's still not insulting to me, for it never ever claimed to tell anything "bigger than life itself", but for such a hype and praise that I've received from its fans, I really was expecting something more, than a half-covered boy/boy- kiss, tears in a toilet, and ever-so-vague engagement.

Prehaps in season 2...


Art (9)

The art is where this anime stands strong on its own! I love this! I really, really love this!

The colors are pretty much all the shades of blue, which correlates nicely with the whole theme of ice, and skating, giving it that somewhat magical/unreal, almost that dreamworld- like tone, that I just love to death. The lighting is pretty, and the character desings are... passable, atleast. The japanese guy is still your basic, generic japanese guy, and most of the guys look like pretty, skinny girls, but that's what expected, really - you can't ice skate, with 1000 stones of pure muscle!

The choreographics of the ice skating competitions are the absolute best parts of the entire show! Every single move is precise. Every single routine is detailed and spot on. Every jump the skaters make... every fall... every victory and every defeat... you just feel them all! The art captures perfectly every motion... every emotion and motive, that these skaters have, and their passion to shine above others. You just need to watch all those jumps, and you can literaly feel yourself jumping youself! You just need to see someone fall or tumble, and you feel for them! Skating, like every sport, is a cruel game, where only one can be the best one, and when these characters literaly put everything they got for their routines, you just live with them, in every moment and downfall.

My hat and gloves are off for you! Bravo, gentlemen! Bravo!


Sound (8)

The sounds... what can I say. It's a show about ice skating, so of course, the music will also be beautiful. I'm sure I won't be the only one, who's totally hooked with the Agape and Eros - simply two atmost beautiful pieces of soundtrack-music, that I've heard in a long while!

Since I saw this anime in english dub, I guess I should say something about the accents... but I don't. I'm from Finland - the only accents I even recognized, was the russian accents, and even those felt somewhat... forced! Intentionally, prehaps...? Can japanese voice-actors even do russian accents...?


Character (5)

The characters... all the three of them?

Yuuri is a wuss. He's an uke. He learns to skate... like a girl? He cries a lot. He's often being mocked as a fatty, and considered almost to old to compete seriously... at the age of 25. What can I say about him?! His dull as a rock! Nothing in him interests me, except his Eros-routine, and he still acts like a fourteen-year-old girl, being all shy and nervous and innocent and all that tall crap! For f*ck sake, you're a man! Start for once acting like one!

Victor is seme. He's russian. He's sexy... apparently also a nudist of some sort. As a skater, he's top in his profession, and thus every single girly-boys wet dream, on ice. He got nothing for me.

Yuri... is russian too. He skates. He... fuck him.

Yeah... characters are bland. Very bland. They're tasteless. They all skate. And two of them, have the same name - all for you, shippers and fanfiction-writers.

When I usually say "bland", it usually means, that the characters have no personalities, nor motives or desires. In this case, however, the "bland" means... extremely generic. All the characters do have personalities... and very distinguished at that! They all want something, they're all very well motivated and they do all change throughout the story, but... they're nothing new to me. I've seen all these characters done billion times already... only, in this time, the main heroes are gay! It's and old model, with some new paint on it, which doesn't make it interesting! It's just... bland! Bait!

It's kinda like the same thing, that happened very often in movies in 90s' - if a character is gay/bi/whatever, the whole character is build around that fact. In here, all the characters are skaters, and two of them are closet gays - that's their personality! No, they're not similar to each other, and yes, they do have their own motives, quirks, habbits and such, but it's still so obvious, that they're ment to be skater-gays first, and everything else later on!

All in all, these characters are this weird, unsatisfying combination of frustation, blandness and harmless charm, that forms no real image in my head! They're nothing new, and still... I find nothing rage-worthy in them! They're just... baits! Gay-baits, and nothing more!

But, yes... keep in mind, that this was twelve-episode season 1, so... prehaps, next time, we get so see some actual characters, than some generic fanfiction-shells.


Enjoyment (6)

Man, this is hard...!

Despite all my gripes with this show, I actually really liked it... occasionally.
I wasn't going in for it because of the story, nor the characters, but the ice skating, and I got what I wanted - nothing more, nothing less. Of course, I was left wanting for more, especially in terms of stroy and the characters, but that's what we have season 2 for, right? Right?!

Yuri on Ice, is pretty much the definition of "candy with no sugar"- anime - it looks pretty, but tastes bad. It has a nice overlook to it, but little to no subtance, which will make you wonder, what's the even point to it! It's one of those shows, that will get overhyped by the Fandom, and thus, hated by those, who were expeting something a little bit more, than what it gave to us. Yes, it's still not done yet, but what is done by now, is not anything anything that special to beging with - deal with it!

But, if I have to bring up something that I truly liked to see, exept beautiful skating routines, was the - surprise! - the romance-angle, of the story! I really liked the Yuuri/Victor- relationship. It started out nicely, as a mentor/pupil- thing, turning into innocent romance... relatively fast, considering their opposite personalities. I really liked their little sidestory, and I really want to see them grow and develope even more... as a couple, and as individuals.


Overall (5)

In overall, Yuri on Ice was a big, big disappointment. Harmless and pretty-looking candy with no sugar, but still... a disappointment.

The story was bland, the characters were almost blander, and I really had to ride on that novelty-pony all the way to the Hellville, so that I could really enjoy the only things this show had to offer - music, art, and skating. This anime has nothing noteworthy, nor revolutionary, to grand it higher-than-good- rating, a and if it didn't have that one single half-assed gay-kiss thrown in the mix, even it's horny fans would see this season as a total turd!

Still, I'm not going to hate. Yes, it was hyped excessively, and yes, maybe the Fandom will always see more in this, than anyone else on Earth will ever see, but... I can respect them for that. This may have been a dry plum for me, but atleast, some will find some juice left in it.

*English is NOT my first language! This review will be edited... eventually!*

Sword Art Online. Loved by many, hated by just as many. Hyped from the day one, and thus being praised as one of the best animes of all time... or, atleast, of this season. As a luck would have it, I wasn't part of that hype. My previous experiences with a... lets say, similarly overhyped titles, tought me a good and faluable lesson to sit back and wait, wheter or not the hype would wear off, as the time passes . And what do you know... it did. Majorly!

And yet, somehow, I wasn't prepared ... for it! Even though I managed to save myself from the flaming hype-storm, and was pretty much the last one to ever see SAO from the beginning to the end, it still somehow managed to take me by surprise, by how horribly dissapointing it was... and I WAS warned in advance!

Sword Art Online, was a mental battle, unlike any other that I've seen since my DBZ-reviewing days! With a solid and interesting beginning premise, abysmally mediocre story, horribly unsatisfying ending, and disapointingly boring characters, SAO is a equivalent example of a show, done horribly wrong! A sad yet unfulfilling example of crippleling lazines, that should never be given as much of attention, as it so unfortunately often times receives.

Story (3)

The story itself, is almost so basic and simple, that I would almost be tempted to call it "ABC of Fanfiction"! Start with a strong and interesting premise, sully it with pointless exposition and boring bantering, and then just... end it! End it, by pissing to the wind!

And the people, still affected by the hype, were the ones to say, that the story was deffinetly the best part of SAO!

Wow! Really, people! Really?! This, is good ENOUGH, for a story?! This?!

Clearly, there's miscommunication between me, and the "best story ever made, ever"- title, because all I can see, is just some jumbled bits and pieces of that said "story" here and there, randomly scattered allwhere and everywhere, where they would soon be drowned in a sea of melodrama and amazingly superior musical score!

But, let's not be overly critical here, just for the sake of it shall we?

The beginging is indeed interesting enough - atleast, for me - to keep me glued in my anime-watching- position for about... ten... twelve episodes, at tops, when the story seems to be rolling... quite nicely. The world seems interesting... altough, a bit generic, messy and boring, in most parts, but there are - literaly! - some hidden gems in here and there, so it doesn't feel that bad... for that ten to twelve episodes, that is! But, after that magical point, when the story starts to lose focus, and it's all about just some random game-battles, escort-missions with teen-lolies, or characters just blabering on and on about some pointless gaming terms to one another, it all just... fell down to its face, with no splender, or dignity! The story literaly just stopped, and it seemed to have no interest to move forward god knows for how long, until it suddenly just jumped into its conclusion, and pissed me off with a promises of a second season!

If you've ever played any RPG's, or games in general... and if you know anything about fantasy/harem-genres - seriously, just look at the poster! - you will know, where this story is going, from the very start! No big surprises, and absolutely no actual creative thinking needed, from the outside of the freaking clishe-box!

"This one guy plays this game - he becomes uber-good at it! So good, that he becomes famous inside the game... for some reason - because he's edgy, emo, and... solo! Bunch of girls appear in front of him, with some boring side quests for him, and thus instantly fall in love with him... because for a reason! Then stuff happens, and then, the ending!"

It's like every MOE-game ever created! Tropped in a medieval setting! And not even that good setting, in fact! There's nothing but villages, forests or flower fields - boring!

This story was not worth of my time. It's not worth anyones time. It was tedious, boring, pointless, and deffinetly... not worth the hype it got when first aired! I could count for atleast hundred other animes, with better story, than SAO... but why bother?! Overrated Hype is after all even bigger/badder Boss, than the Nostalgia Goggles, so... no point for me dying, by hanging myself on that cross!


Art (6)

The art style isn't really anything, that I haven't seen done before - it's generic. It's doesn't have that "so good it makes me piss myself!"- sort of quality, but atleast it's clean, nice to look at, and without any major hicbums... hicups! Both the magical bums... elements, and the elements of nature are actually done pretty shapely... well, and especially the sunlight was always such a arse-candy... a treat, for my eyes that I was almost drooling on my keaboard! (All those bums...!)

That being said, the character designs, nor the levels of the game, aren't really something to get all overly exited about! Or... maybe, the arses...

The characters are blander than bland, the most cookey-cuttered, the most basic "japanese" heroes, that you could ever think of, or find - young boy, black hear, dark eyes... blah! - and the levels of the SAO-game are just as variable as most of the Amnesia- custom story- levels! Nice fields of flowers everywhere... even nicer forests and village-sets, apparently stolen from some kind of team park... that went broke!

So, yeah... Even though I normally never mention my legit opinions about the arts or music, this time, I have to mention the art as one of the view saving graces for this anime... because, believe me... this one desperately needs it!


Sound (9)

Speaking of sounds... the music in SAO is absolutely beautiful! Truly... this must be one of the most beautifully made soundtracks, that I've heard in a long time!

SAO's soundtrack has everything, that a good show could ever need. It's soothing, when it's needed, it's fast and energetic when needed, and it's sad, and emotional, when needed. It's almost too perfect to be excluded with SAO, but to be fair... this soundtrack was in the end the only reason why I even bothered to care some of the scenes, in the last third of the show.

I do admit... sometimes, such overally melodramatic scores may come just a tiny bit cheap ways to bring out emotions and weight in a situtations where there never really isn't... any... but atleast one of these scores brought tears in my eyes - on it's own, without any cheap deaths added! - so it gets a pass from me, this time, as a saving grace.


Characters (2)

THEY SUCK!!!

Okey, so... that was blunt.

No, really! They do suck!

The main hero of ours is so OP, bland and annoying, that I would rather eat paint than call him even a character! I've heard many times, that Kirito is nothing but a archetypical wish fulfillment- character, and I couldn't agree more! Everything he wants, he gets! Everything he tries to do, he can... even if no one else can't, and with no actual effort, but just... deciding he wants to do it! With such a thick plot-armor, he never makes any major mistakes, or suffer any losses... because he is the famous Kirito - god of SAO!

Asuna isn't really any better. She's just some mediocre tsundere, with swords... and she cooks. That's it! There's nothing else in her, that would make her even a character! But, because SAO is clearly a harem/hentai-simulator, she also bends on top of the tables, gets groped by tentacle-monsters... gets almost raped in a bird cage... and actually is the one, that has sex with the main hero, so... Whait! Was there supposed to be a compliment in there, somewhere?

The villain of this turd, is still by far even worse, than... no, whait! There are actually... two, no, three villains! First, there's Kayaba, who programmed SAO, and turned harmless RPG, into a horrible, virtual-reality death-trap! He's pointless - he doesn't even remember, why he did all this, in the first place!

Secondly, theres this... Fairy King Oberon - oh, brother! - who kidnaps Asuna, locks her up in a cade, and ever-so gentlemanly, rapes her in submission... with marriage! He's pointless - he gets bitch-slapped and... cries? Idk...

Thirdly, there is this murdering quilt called the Laughing Coffin. They do nothing.

Who did I miss... Oh, yeah! All those booby-girls, who won't get to sleep with Kirito! Yeah... they're pointless, too.

And what's even worse, is that all the character development that happens, or doesn't happen, is based upon Kirito... because his harem is pretty much the only part of the cast, that gets any legit screen time! All they talk about, is Kirito. All they ever think about, is Kirito! But do they really change, grow or develope, as a characters because of this... constant hormonal obsession? No! Does Kirito ever change, grow or develope, because of his ever-expanding harem? Nope! He just stays the same, because he's so awesome that way!

Bo-f*cking-ring!


Enjoyment (4)

First, it was interesting. Then, it became fun. Then it was boring. Then pointless. Then stupid. Then boring, again! Then, there were bums... No!

It's like, the writers really did tried to give us something worth while, then went all "f*ck off", and decided to just wing it, since it already became so popular... apparently by merits beyond my comprehention. I still would've been totally fine with it, if the whole show itself was all about this mystery... how far, or how low humanity can really go in order to survive, and is make-believe world actually a better option for some, than the reality?

And what about the conclusion, then?!

What was Kayabas' intention for all of this - to make a point... to dick around, or just play god in his own world? Spoilers - we will never know!

I didn't want to see Kirito, running around with his harem! I didn't want any forced romance between him, and Asuna! I didn't want a villain, who can't even remember his own motives! I didn't want to see underaged girls being groped and sexually abused - I have my own sites for that!

When I can only enjoy a show, purely because of it's graphics and music, then believe you me, there's deffinetly something wrong! Horribly wrong!


Overall (4)

Sword Art Online, is a hot, steaming, overhyped and overrated mess, that I for once, can't bring myself to absolutely hate... unlike, many other titles, with similar crosses to bear!

The show just didn't live up to it's full potential. In my eye, it just had too many problems to overcome, and not nearly enough time, skill, nor interest to make an effort to improve things it needed to.

Give us full and inventive story to follow - not just some shallow and bland harem/escort mission- simulation! Give us some interesting and complex characters - not these talking dolls with swords glued up in their arms! Give me a world, that's unlike any other that I've ever seen - not this mediocre medieval village-community, that I could've come up after lobotomy!

Overally... there are better things out there. A lot better things! I do see, why this show became so popular, but even though I did not like it, I'm not entirely one of the haters, either. Sword Art Online is... harmles, to say the least. It's deffinetly not something, that I would watch ever again, but luckily... there's always an Abridged series!

*This review includes both seasons. Spoilers shall be avoided! English is not my native language - mistakes in grammar shall be made!*

I love history - especially the European, and Victorian history! I love romance - presumed it's done with passion, care and interest! That being said, Monogatari Emma should've been almost perfect watch for me, but sadly... the ever-so short twelve-episodes seasons are just the tip of the iceberg, in what this anime seemingly refused to do right for me!

Story (4)

The story is... well, it's not good! It is actually so bland, unimaginative and uninspired, that I could easily call it the Twilight-level of horribleness, ... and wouldn't blink an eye, while saying so! If I would give some random 15-year-old girl a book about Victorian era, told her to read it, then write a love story that takes place on that said era, Monogatari Emma would be exactly what I would get! And what saddens me even more is that... this is almost exactly the same story, that I would've writen myself... with the atmost miserable ending, of course!

The romances taking place in Victorian era were all pretty much all the same - triangle-dramas, deceat, debauchery, strickt laws an norms of class society between those who got it all, and those who have nothing are all the traits that are just as common now, as they were back then, thus very little room or space to develope is been given. It's all put in line with one of the most restricted formulas for a romance that you could ever think of, because the choises according to such stories, are always the same - either skip the historical accurasies (Pocahontas II) and give people what they want, or keep the facts, and... suck at romance, because God knows Victorians were bland as paint with that!

Monogatari Emma has nothing in it's story, that stands out from any other romance or love story, that takes place in this certain era, or that handles such themes like class society, "we who are all, and those who are nothing"- consept, prejudice and accepting the norms and expectations of the sociaty, that pretty much tells you everyday, how to live your live accordingly. It's a cute little window to the world that's - mostly! - already long gone, both in cultural and social sence, but other than that... it's not worth of my interest. I've seen better Victorian romances from... anywhere, and if Monogatari Emma's story is what I should use as a comparison, I shall continue doing so in the future as well.


Art (7)

The artstyle of Monogatari Emma is cute... it's pretty, and it's... well, not the most liveliest, but it does it's job, looking like a old photo, or an oil-painting, almost, in some parts. It holds little to no splashes of color, which makes it really monotonous and bland... much like the story and the characters. It's still somewhat nice to look at, but sadly... evenn though being it's saving grace, it's just not enough to "save" this anime.

In romance, I need something to feel - not something to look at!

Sound (6)

The voice actors do decent job while playing their characters, but none of them truly standed out for me. They're all pretty generic - easy to listen, and easy to forget - and the less I'll be saying about the music, the better! This is just... the most awful Victorian music, right here! It has no life nor soul in it... nothing, that would hold my interest over a bland story, and even blander characters... and it really pisses me off, because Victorian music is not this... bland! It shouldn't be!


Characters (4)

...or the lack of the characters, more likely.

Let's keep it short and sweet, shall we. These characters... are cut-outs! Bland and boring cut-outs, every single one of them! We have our idiot-boy-in-love, his quirky best friend... with a indian harem, and an elephant... and our leading lady is a blander-than-blander twat, that somehow charms the Indian prince to courtship her... and she barely says a freaking word to anyone!

Ironically, main heroine Emma, is my biggest gripe against this anime, and for a good reason, might I say! She's supposed to be this "poor, unfortunate but sweet soul", picked and raised from the utmost poverty and misery, that falls in love with a handsome nobleman, but... despite of what I just told about her, she's really not that interesting as a character! Much like the art style, she's just a decent painting, with no color - no shades, no shadows, and seemingly no flaws to speak of! She never speaks, she never shares her emotions to anyone, neither does she show them - I'm starting to doubt that she even has any of those! - and even when she's being separated from her love, only to find herself a new one - because, apparently, glasses and stone-like expressions are sooo attractive! - she just seems to think herself "Duuuu...." and move along with the story, like a mindless puppet... not wanting anything, not saying anything... doing nothing!

I hate heroines like Emma, and when this whole story is pretty much about just her and her "struggles" with forbidden love... I just can't believe that I didn't drop this anime all together, thanks to her!


Enjoyment (5)

The best word to describe Monogatari Emma, is generic... or mediocre, if you like. It has nothing look at, nothing to feel for, and nothing to remember right after the first watching. Anyone who knows anything about romances knows, how this story's gonna end, and even without the historical accurasies, it was pretty ludicrous to look at, even for me!

This is the basic of the basics - the absolute bare-boned sceleton of a standard romance-formula, that was blooming even in the earliest Victorian era's novels, poetry, arts and writings. Monogatari Emmas' consept may've been new and innovative... maybe even naughty and dangerous for those times, but after seeing so many other better love stories than this, I really can't see the overall appeal. It wasn't enjoyable to watch, and I shall not waste my time with it anymore, ever again.


Overall (5)

Monogatari Emma, is just some sweet, innocent, rose-tinted but never too deep or dirty fluff, that's trying to imitate an actual, well-developed and memorable romace-story... while failing miserably.

It's not something that I would recommend to anyone, but... if you like romances, are a fan of the Victorian era, or if you just happen to have some time to kill, and don't really care, what you're going to see... I guess I can't stop you for pick this up and see it yourself. I'm just saying, that... you really shouldn't!

I like Mushishi. I like Hetalia. I like Fruits Basket.

I don't like Aria the Animation!

Just to make one thing perfectly clear, I'm not above of SoL-shows or even a shows that have no over-branching story to give! As long as the premise and the characters are enjoyable, I can pretty much swallow any kind of SoL-experiences there is... mostly! When I was adviced to pick the Aria up, I was spectical, yes, but still optimistic enough to give it atry, and after the experience that I would describe at best as a "4 hour nap-time", I'm greatly dissapointed!

First of, what is good? Or "good", ... if you will. Well... the art is decent, often times quite pretty, actually! The Aqua as a location is pretty to look at, but not very innovative nor interesting to look at. I mean... when you have a Mars turned into "secon Earth", there should be imo something much more interesting to invest into, than snowflies and bizarre cats for crying out loud! The sounds of the characters are really mellow and soft - read; I hate them! - but the music is really beautiful, expecially the opening songs and endings, with their lovely animations - I just adore those "brush-painted" endings so much! Is there anything else to praise about?

Well... not really.

The story is really bare-boned, shallow, and completely lacking any kind of conflict, or suspence. Which is to be expected, I quess, when the story revolves around these three clones... I mean "truly individual and/or unique" girls, dreaming to someday "row, row, row the boat, gently down the canal of this not-at-all-copy-pasted-image-of-an-Venice-that-comes-to-mind-to-every-japanese-animator-that-hear-the-word-of-condola-and-ask-if-it's-some-kind-of-musical-instrument", because apparently, the profession of the condoliers is in this world pretty much at the same level, as the supermodels and popstars... before they hit the meth.

The show is very linear - despite it taking a place in a city, that's covered in water! - and can often times feel either quite draggy, or rushed, which is very easy to pin-point on the fact that it's a short show. I for one refuce to accept that as an excuse! I know, that if the story is good, the amount of episodes has nothing to do with it! The story told in under a 13-episodes can be amazing, if the story is good, just as the show with 50-episodes or more can be jut as afwul, if the story is bad! Aria the Animation has a bad story, and no amount of episoded couldn't have saved it from it's predicament.

Okay, so, the story didn't obviously win me over. So, how about the characters then?

What characters?! There are none!

Atleast... not anyone that I would whole-heartedly think of as a character! They're all the same - you're typical "nice-girls" with their sweet expressions and "cute" quirks, with no actual dilemmas, or flaws to speak of. They all even have the exact same goals, and what ever little personality they all have, leaves them just bland, boring, and one-dimensional. The humor is also really dry, and wears off really quickly, but it's actually not that visible, so my brain was pretty save from that one.

But let me swear... if I hear that "my, my, my" even one more time I'll...!

That being said... did I hate it?

Not really!

It's mellow and soft atmosphere was actually quite pleasant, and a nice breather from my more common, action-oriented and plot-heavy shows with multi-dimensional characters, that I seem to favor over more light-hearted shows.

That being said, I wouldn't watch it agains, since it didn't have that same SoL-hook, that so many other shows tend to have over me. It doesn't invite me to come back and pick it up againd, which leaves me quite cold towards it.

But, would I still recommend this?

Sure... if you happen to ride condola for a living!

No, seriously!

I would recommend Aria the Animation for those, who like mellow atmosphere, aren't really into action or heavy plots, and just want something relaxing and comforting to watch, without any conflicts, drama, or villains. Those who enjoy their animes with a little bit more content, and more fleshed-out characters, this is a easy skip!

I can only hope, that the Natural is better than this, because I really wanted to like Aria! Sadly, this isn't an promising start.

"My, my, my!"

Aaaargh!!!

STORY: 2
ART: 7
SOUND: 8
CHARACTER: 2
ENJOYMENT : 6
OVERALL: 5

Sharpen your nostalgia goggles and be ready for earworms that won't leave you until the next day's hangover, because this movie literally is every finnish kids childhood, compressed in a less than 70 minutes!

Moomins, or Muumit, like we call them here in Finland, are these little gritter-like creatures - size-wised somewhere around a hedgehog - who live in a not-so-magical and almost-realistic-like world, called the Moomin valley, spending their days mostly just... well, pretty much in a same manner, like I used to spend my summers when I was a kid. Originally created by Tove Janson, Moomins weren't originally ment especially to be mainly ... for kid's entertainment, since the original strips contained pretty heavy adult themes, like drinking, life and death, our place in a world, loneliness, obsessions and fear. The original Moomins even looked pretty creepy, and the characters tended to be way more adult-like, than how I used to know them as a child! But, since Japan showed an interest to turn this dark, mysterious finnish creation into a slice of live- formula-based tv-show for kids, it's only natural, that in a prosess, the movie was also made! And, here it is! Moomins the Movie: the Armageddon!

So, what's the story then? The story begins on a events even earlier than the actual tv-show ever took place. Moomin family is settleing down in a peaceful Moomin valley - how it was called, before this little convenient naming, I wonder? - and building up their vairly marketable blue round house, when one stormy night, a shady character under a bridge tells them, that something bad is on it's way, and there's absolutely nothing they should, or could do about it. After a heavy rain of unexplainable soot, Moomin trollen, accompanied by couple of his friends, decide to travel all the way to the Lonely Mountains, in a search for a observatory, and on the way, they meet many friends and enemies, like Snuffking, the travelling but world-wise hermit, crystal-obsessed lizards, dangerous bug-eating Angostura-tree, Hemulen, Octopus, and of course, know-it-all Snorken and his sister Snorkfröken, who becomes Moomin trollens immiedate love-interest. Together they learn, that a dangerous Comet is on it's way to the Moomin valley, and it's only about two days time to evacuate, and save whatever there is to save - funny thing is, that the astrologists have absolutely no idea, what will hapen when the comet hits, and are actually excited about it!

The story is indeed exceptional, considering the sourcematerial, but oddly enough, it really actually works to it's favour! It's not overly complex, and it's thus easy to follow, but it gives constantly that odd yet curious vibe about something unknown approaching, not exactly knowing what it is or what'll does, and if the worst possible hapens, what's left after - rebuild, death, or search for a new home? Seeing how this steadily approaching threat from beyond the stars, with no name, personality or motive, simultaneously destroys everything on it's way and causes both panic, terrors and sadness to those, who're about to loose everything, but also exitement and joy for those, who won't understand the real danger and are just waiting in a amazed awe, is both terrifying and dark, that wouldn't so easily fly in many other franchises, especially aimed for kids. And, since this movie was partly made in Japan, the music is of course a top notch, since every single piece and note fits and plays perfectly in every scene, complimenting the beautiful landscapes and emotions, so that the overused exposition is almost completely left out. This movie doesn't hold any hands, or doesn't try to make something "less frightening" that it should be. It's a story about a world, that's about to end - how much sugar coating there really can even be?!

That all being said, I really can't say, whom I can recommend this to, other than all the fellow finns, and those rare individuals abroad, who know the original Moomins. You don't need to know all the characters, or their stories, since most of the characters are actually met first time in this movie, as their own debute to the viewer. This movie was Finland's seventh most watched movie in it's time, but still, it never saw a light of day in any country outside of Japan and Scandinavia, and sadly, it was never dubbed in english - not in my knowledge, anyway. If you even happen to find it from the ether, I'm pretty sure it's either on finnish, or swedish, and since not so many people actually really understand any of these two languages... yeah, good luck watching this movie, if you're at all interested. My condolences.

Overall, this movie is great. It starts of the whole premise for the tv-series, introducing many of our favourite characters and even some of the actual world and it's wonders and dangers, without being too overwhelming, and even tough it is mostly suitable for kids, even adults can still enjoy watching it with them. If I could, I would translate this whole movie into english subs, since I know Finland is gaining popularity on abroad, as a relatively interesting country and culture, but because I myself don't own this movie in DVD... yeah, I'm not that smart!

Enjoy this movie, those of you who can, and keep the spirit of Moomins burning bright! And that theme music... omg what a earworm that is!

Story: 9
Art: 9
Sound: 10
Character: 8
Enjoyment: 10
Overall: 10

*English is not my first language! Review will be edited... eventually.*

Babysteps. This sequel, is like a babystep on the right direction, by it's improved arts and characterization, but, in the end, falls flat right to it's face.

Super Sailor Chibi Moon... I know it happened in the original too, but still... c'mon! Does this really have to be so close of DBZ-levels of stupid?!

Sailor Moon season III The Death Busters was always my favourite season in the original Sailor Moon, because of it's multicolored characters - both heroes and villains... whom are fairly plentiful in this season - and the final intorducion of three ... outer senshi, which I always found much more deeper, interesting and all in all more fascinating characters, than the first five girls of the Sailor-set. Since I was honestly dissapointed by the quality and the overall end-product of the first two seasons of SMC, I wasn't hoping much when turning the third season on to 'play'... and even though this was better than the prequel, as much as it pains me to say, I just can't fully enjoy this one either!

Of course, it's always deligtful to see, that the animation is much more pleasant to look at, and they took away those horrible CGI-effects that plagued the first two season! The music is still one of the two biggest saving graces for the entire season, but the other inner senshi - including Usagi - are actually growing to resemble more of those girls from the original SM, that I really used to love and appriciate. That being said, this pretty much covers all the good stuff in this show for me.

My biggest gripe against this show, was - surprise! - the outer senshi themselves. Why? Because this show is only 13 episodes long! The original SM took way more time to truly build up and develope the first two outer senshi, Michiru and Haruka, who for the longest time, played this complicated masquerade with the inner senshi, of whether or not they're the enemy, or the ally. This one... yeah. No time for that one, since the whole season itself was already packed full with storyelements and plotpoints, that it was almost essential to cut something out... and, unfortunately, that something was indeed characterization and development of character-chemistry, if you will.

In the original SM, the premise was as such. This dangerous, mysterious evil from outer space, Messiah of Silence, was heading straight to Earth, and because that something is indeed evil, it wants to destroy - no surprises there. The only way to defeat it, is this Holy Grail, that, depending of the hands it falls, can either destroy everyhting, or save everything. Again, fairly simple. But, in order to contain that Holy Grail, you must have these three talismans, that are hidden inside of living human beings, and if you distract those talismans out of them, they'll die. Now, that's way too dark for our five little girls to handle, so, on the spotlight steps these two, mysterious senshi, that are voluntarily ready to soil their hands in the blood of innocents, in order to save many, and so fulfill their destiny before the prophezised dooms day.

This is the story that I really enjoyed in the original show, since it created this unavoidable conflict between two groups of senshi, with the same goal in mind, but with different means to achieve said goal - save the world and do not sacrifice anyone in the process. This both alienated the outer senshi out of inner senshi, since they couldn't work together because of their differing ideals, and made them these unvoluntary villains, since their destiny being to kill somebody, in order to save many, was something that the inner senshi just couldn't get behind. This was great to watch in the original searies, but in this... no! Just... no!

Firstly, the talismans are already found. Yeah! All the three of them! All there, in their hands, and already in good use, when in the original, it literaly cost a life and limb to obtain them! And instead of these unvoluntary villains, these Michiru and Haruka - Setsuna too, I guess... - were more like these Messengers of Doom, all dark, eary and mysterious... stalkers, but, in the end, always ready to stand behind Usagi and her believes, when in the original series, it was never truly brought up directly. They were still fighting together, but unlike the inner senshi, outer senshi took themselves a bigger picture to take care of, and I really appreciated that about them too.

Another gripe of mine was the character of Hotaru. No, wait... not the character herself - she was done beautifully in this! - but her... eh, that scene, were she makes Chibi-usa cry, at the balcony. The death scene! That was stupid.

Don't get me wrong, now! It was beautiful, but it was also stupid! Really stupid. Kinda like those notorious DBZ-moments, when a character dies, they're all yelling and screaming into the skies above, and all I'm asking is, "why do we even care?"! Why do I have to care, if the senshi of Death and Rebirth is dying, but will later return as a baby?! Way too sappy way to create more drama, if you ask me, and I could've managed easily without it, thank you very much!

Overall, this season of SMC isn't perfect... in fact, it's not even good. But, it was still way more enjoyable, than the first two seasons, if only because of the improved arts, still breathtakingly beautiful soundtrack, and characters. Other than that, I wouldn't recommend this to... well, anyone, really. It doesn't please of those who like the original SM, it sure as hell doesn't please of those who'd like to learn more about Sailor Moon, and I can't think off any scenario, in which this series would please any regular anime-fans either!

This series was just marketing - nothing more, nothing less. Watch if you're still interested, but don't feel bad for droping it. Trust me, because I wouldn't.

Story: 6
Art: 8
Sound: 7
Character: 6
Enjoyment: 6
Overall: 6

So... this is what disappointemt tastes like. Like piss-soaked cardboard, if you ask me.

If you're already familiar with my earlier review of the first season of Hell Girl, you should already know, that I loved the first season. It had it's annoyances, yes, but overall, it was very good piece of work. So, with no doubt, I was generally excited to hear that there indeed was a second season for one of my favourite animes... with original japanese voices, what whatever! I looked it up, watched it... and afterwards, I was so disappointed, that I actually cried blood!

As for a short recap... in the ... first season of Hell Girl, the Hell Link was just about this urban myth about a website where you can in the stroke of midnight write down a name of the person that you wish being sented to Hell - of course, no one knows anything about the subject of payment... which is stupid, but to me, it gives a really nice edge. No one took the rumors seriously, until our victim of the week had someone they truly wished for a revenge, and oh boy did they deserve to be punished - in the first season, mind you... not in this one! We had bullies stuffing that one girl's... undercarriage with a glass pipe, and threathening to brake it! We had that one crazy lady, that inherited big cash, killed her family, and took that one girl as a hostage, and killed her puppies, just for funcies, and that crazy family, with obsession for dolls... just to name the view! All royally fucked up people, and I just loved to see them being sented to Hell! What did we got in this season? Well... some dude spilled some coffee on top of some other dude, and scratched his car. Wow... that's hardcore (read my loud sarcasm).

The formula of the plot stays pretty much the same, as it was in the first season, but only in this season, the pay-up isn't even closely as satisfying, as it was in the first season. The Hell Link isn't anymore as much as some silly urban legend, but almost like some basic common knolewdge, as simply and freguently used, as facebook, or twitter! When the first season showed us some actual predicaments, with victims and true despair, this season gives us just some pesky nuicanses, with shallow means and little to no meaning, all easily removed by simply opening this one website, and sending that nuicanse to the Hell! I like revenge as a way to tell the stroy, or as a plot point, but only, if the revenge is deserved... and, in here, it really isn't! At some point, we do get this weird side story about this one kid, being called the Devil's child by his entire village, and soon afterwards, the whole town starts sending each other to the Hell... for whatever reasons they can come up on that day! Maybe the laundry isn't done! Maybe the rice is cold! Maybe he can't sing! Maybe I don't like her hair! It's all the same to me! "It's not like my grievance is brought to me by some psycho murderer, or a false marriage, or a rape baby... I'm just gonna use this link I wound from the internet, and send my neighbor to Hell, because his face makes my baby cry!" Is it already obvious, of why I hate this season so much?! It took that one thing, that it should have been kept the same, and it ruined it... in so many ways!

Another thing, that I wasn't so keen on, was the side stories of the Hell Girl's helpers - that old guy, hottie in japanese style, and and steaming-hot honey in kimono. As I said in my earlier review, I saw them more appealing to me, when I knew the absolute minimun out of them... which in return contradicts my absolute love and passion for deep, multi-dimensional characters. I didn't need to know, who they were, where they came from, or what kind of people they were... or are, for that matter - it was more scarier to me, when the victims were dealing with something that even I couldn't quite understand. In this season, we do get to know a whole lot more about all of them, who they were and how they came to serve Ai Enma in her guest - which could be a huge plus to someone else - but it really didn't bring anything interesting, or absolutely essetial to the story! I don't want these characters to be people, but some morally grey entities, that'll send me to Hell, if I happen to live in this looney-ville full of crazy people, and my happen to step on someone's shoes! And, oh... just to get this out of my system... I really did hate Kikuri! I really did! Brat...

But, since I don't wish any of the fans to write my name down to the Hell link, I guess I have to say something nice... about this season, that is. The art was indeed marvellous, and the music was beautiful - especially the ending song... so lovely! But, other than that, the merits end there. The stroy wasn't any good, the characters were given the time of day that I never ever asked for them to have, thus cutting down the energy to create actually interesting revenge-stories, and the enjoyment was... Well, let's just say that I still taste the piss-soaked cardboard! It was lazy, it was stupid, and that whole "town becoming crazy"- storyline was just laughably absurd, that I was just waiting, when the whole town sets itself to fire, thus sending them all to Hell all in once! Now that would've been funny... instead of drowning children in the lake!

I would have gladly skipped this season, and not miss a thing, if I would've known for the advance, what was coming to me! If I'd have to recommend this sequel to somebody... I couldn't do it, even if I'm being sented to Hell for it. It isn't any good, and if you already liked the first season, skip this and start with the third. Trust me... you don't wannt to cry blood!

Story: 3
Art: 9
Sound: 9
Character: 4
Enjoyment: 2
Overall: 4

*English is not my first language! Review will be edited... eventually.*

I can only imagine, that relatively low score for this show is either earned by those, who grew up watching the old show - like yours truly - or from those, who are fans of the manga and not so much of the anime, OR from those, who are just thrown away by this "new-age art style a la CGI"- animation, and think it as a canser of the art-form that so many of us love, and admire - like yours truly! Either way, I'm with them, since the original Sailor Moon is actually one ... of my favourite animes of all time, and this clumsy, empty, clunky mess of two whole seasons, compressed - do not laugh - only in 26 episodes, really really REALLY pissed me off! In so many levels of estrogen, that you don't even know!!

Oh boy, where to start?! Okay... first, the good news! The openin song was nice.

Yeah! I'm not even kidding right now!

The opening song is indeed nice... if I don't need to see the actual animation - such a horror of cheap CGI! The song was catchy, powerful, and managed to embrace the themes and the story of Sailor Moon itself relatively well - just a little bit too pushy with that "not all girls need a man to help them"- kinda propaganda, if you know the original show, but... I'm just gonna let that stand, for now!

In fact, the soundtarck as a whole, can be described as decent, at WORST! It's not so peppy and up-going, like its 90's grandmummy was, with happy flutes, sad violines and dramatic drums, but instead, really mellow, sooth and really... orchestra-like, with all the high vocals and... dear I even say... epic overtone. It was a big change to the original, indeed, but a nice one, and I have no problems with that.

Secondly, if I have to mention this, for not to sound a total douchebag for not liking this show, those little segments between the halfs of the episodes, with those pastel-colored pictures and those little melodies, were absolutely beautiful, and I just loved them! Marvelous, period! Nothing more to say about that!

Okay, so... that was the good part. Now comes the bad! To those, who are yet not familiar with my style of reviewing the shows, I usually never ever touch the subjects of art, nor sounds, since those two are to me two the most least... important aspects in any show. In this case, however... I'm gonna keep my ground on this one, too. At least, on the art department! Those transformations with that horrible CGI were by no means awful, but except for that, I have no bigger quarrels against the art overall over here! It's new, and it takes things differently, following the styles and traditions of its own time, like the original did in it's time, in it's style, and I get it. The times change! No sins here for me!

The sound, however... Yeah. I really did miss the music of the original show! The old music! The good music! The music, that was happy, and sad, and lively, and dangerous, and epic, and... and had a soul! The old soundtrack had a soul! This one... didn't! I can't remember not even one soundtrack from the Crystal, and it's sad, because... the opening was so nice! What went wrong, you guys?! This is just... no! No!

Secondly, the story. Yeah... this is going to be tedious! The story itself was... well, it was compressed, to say the least. Details were lost and the corners were cut... heavily! And then, it was compressed, yet again! And then, it was edited, and then edited again, and again, so that what was eventually left, was just some really sad, and bare-boned core of a story, that in the original show, used to have a character, humor, sadness, some hardships and seriousness in it as well, without forgeting some teny tiny horror elements as well, and a romance! Don't forget the romance!

This story however, had... well... It had Usagi in it. And.. she's the main heroine, so... not much else needed, I guess. Right... yay? Blah...!

Okay, so... the story sucks! I admit, its sounds really, really weird to me to say this, since I so loved the story in the original, but... hey, when I eat the apple, I want the juicy, succulant meat, and not the seedy core! The story, in the Crystal, has absolutely nothing going on, and without all of those elements from the original show, I'm actually legitimately surprised that they didn't bother to edit the rest of the story into the oblivion too, while they were at it! Everything, that was about anything, was heavily centered around Usagi, and since the story is so rushed, and empty, with no important or outsanding key-elements - unlike it's predecessor - even Usagi's character feels like empty and boring shell of a character, that I used to even like in the original show!

Everything in the story, is without almost any conflict, or drama, and if something needs to get done... it gets done, just like that! Everything is so quick, and easy, that it's almost insulting, and not earned, or engrossing at all! I remember, when Queen Beryl used to be - or at least used to feel like - this big and threathening obsticle, that took absolutely everyhting there was to give to overcome, same with those four Generals, four evil sisters, prince Diamond, Black Lady and the Wiseman, since the Crystal decided to take both two seasons into one! In here, there are little to no time for the villains to interract, and so, I couldn't really care any less, wheter or not they lived or died... which is something, that I used to live through, with a certain other franchise as well - ten points to anyone, who guesses, which one! There was no drama, no connection, and no... no epicness, no emotion, that the original show had, that we got to see through the relationships and the emotions between all the characters, and I really missed that! When the villains got defeated - or in some cases, turned into good side - it felt like something. When the inner senshi died one by one, in order to protect their dear friend, that I myself saw and knew being their good friend, it was truly sad, and meaningful. In here, if someone was killed, or if someone was defeated, it felt like nothing, and it really hurt, since the story was already so bare-boned, and empty, that it at least needed something to happen!

The only thing, that I can give any credit for, was the romance between Serenity and Endymion... and even that felt worsed, and undeserved! It didn't feel like Usagi and Mamoru were in love, but like Serenity and Endymion just stole their bodies for themselves, in a time of convenience, and thus forced them to love each other... because of whatever! That's an identity theft, and somehow even worse, that what prince Diamond tried to do!

And lastly, it all comes down to the characters! Or like... what characters, since the only big character, that I can even think off of ever having any actual meaning, or interaction with the events of the story, was Usagi, and even she was a total bore! The original Usagi, was childish, clumsy, quirky, weird and funny, with her caring, loyal and sweet side, and most importantly... she was a total scaredy cat and a cry-baby! In the original show, she wasted the whole first season about whining, that she didn't want to be a soldier, and that she just wanted to be a normal girl, but in here, it's all said an done, in about... well, never! There's nothing to overcome, and no inner turmoils to rebel against, like any person would normally do, in the situation given her here! She just accepts her being this reincarnation of agient princess of the Moon and magical worrier, and that's it! She doesn't whine, she doesn't cry nor protest against the fact, that her whole life is now changed forever, without even her own say-so... she's not even that scared about anything! That isn't reasonable! She just does, what is needed, and nothing else... literally!

Even lesser can be said, about the other inner senshi! They have absolutely no personalities of their own, no ambitions and I swear... no connection with each other, other than this totally bogus aspect of a past life that they shared together, and are now stuck with, yet again, in the second lifetime - this is not loyalty, nor friendship, but more like a bisnes contract, or a simple responsibility... like cleaning your room every monday!

All the time, that was given to flesh-out the characters in the original show, was cut-down and edited to the absolute minimun, so that what we got in the end, was nothing less, than some pretty faces in sexy costumes, and not much else! Did you know, that Amy wants to be a doctor, just like her mother? No, because there's no time for that - no one likes Amy that much! Or did you know, that Rei wants to be a bisnes-woman, and is truly passionate about love, but only in her own terms? No, because there's no time for that! Makoto wants to open up her own shop one day and loves cooking, and Minako wants to be a famous superstar, but who cares, since they're not that important anyway, to the continuity of the story! Usagi's literaly the only one, that's given any amount of time to grow and develope, and even that - what ever little there was - was done so poorly, and hastely, that it almost felt like cheating! It's not emergive, it's not fun, and it's not... it's not deserved! What ever the original Usagi was, she deserved, through tears and hardships, and this Usagi... she does nothing! She deserves nothing! But, unlike her team mates, at least she's given even just some of her own personal lines to deliver, and not just some filler-lines and meaningless bantering - since all the inner senshi has exact same personalities, it's all the same, what they say, because Usagi can't be talking all the time!

And... about those four generals, and the inner senshi... I didn't buy that. Not once. No. No shipping from me, gals. Sorry.

Overall, this was really poor take! I mean... really poor! And still, I somehow ended up watching it through, and not thinking so badly about it. It was pretty - for some parts! - and some aspects were done atleast decently, and whatever new it brought on the table, that the original show didn't, was fascinating, and kept me going, even if the heavy cuts on the editing table were both seen, and felt, at the same time! It wasn't that awful, but it defenately wasn't good either! I will propably see this again, but only because I've already seen, and loved the original series to the bone!

I wouldn't never ever NEVER recommend this show to those, who haven't yet seen the original show, and are wondering, wheter or not to even start watching it at all. This is not that famous short cut to the fame and glory, that seems like an easy and fun way to go, but only ends to the disaster! Go for the original... watch this at your own leisure.

Story: 6
Art: 3
Sound: 7
Character: 1
Enjoyment: 5
Overall: 4