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Almost identical setting as Love Hina, in less compelling and a tad more edgy — not that the latter is necessarily an issue. Not bad per se, but not much material to keep us engaged. Likeable characters with their own quirks (although maybe a bit forceful e.g. Ami), but predictable narrative tropes and comedic delivery, as well as a slow-paced rhythm without much unfolding. Backstories and their resolutions are way too superficial and easy. Also not as fan service-heavy as the first chapter could make it seem in the long run, which may be a good or bad thing depending on your preferences — definitely ... comes off as a mean to grab audience though, which is valid I guess. The art is very clean, oddly enough. Might be worth a read but overall not the most exciting slice of life out there tbh.

By the way, what's the deal about that second "tip" for new writers? The whole point of a review is giving insights that reflect the opinion of the reader, so of course you should expect them to use pronouns. There's no such thing as an "objective" or unbiased review. Don't assume people can't work out critical thinking on their own, lol. And don't assume they can't read either.