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Anime Stats
Days: 53.5
Mean Score:
4.80
- Total Entries121
- Rewatched0
- Episodes3,141
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All Comments (25) Comments
Punpun, a masterpiece for sure! Seriously, I really cant describe it in words. Spare me, please. The last volume is already translated. So you should finish it when you have the time.
Aside from that I've been doing a lot of audio reviews on the radio. The posts for our 7th series list what we review during the show.
Mmm. Cared little is on the fence, I suppose.
Yes. Don't try and convince people that a lot of people drop it. Just drop the subject altogether. There's no way for you to give definitive proof that "a lot" of people drop it, and for a particular reason to boot.
Anyways, I would say it's a bit too long. I agree with most if not all what Kapodaco-sama said. (Also he's the first person I would've suggested to give feedback, so I kind of find it funny he gave feedback before I even responded!)
Certain portions of the review could be sizably cut down and not ruin what you're describing. In fact, it would better focus the writing by streamlining redundant and/or irrelevant content. For example, your intro paragraph is like a review of its own! It summarizes every component of the story—not actually introducing things to readers insomuch as concluding them. By the time I finished the intro, I was like, "oh okay, that's good info. but isn't the review done now?".
Take the fourth paragraph as another example. It is a mammoth-sized wall at 12 lines long and a bit all over the place. The topic opener leads one to believe the paragraph will explain why "Penguindrum [being] weird" is a legitimate complaint. Instead, it spends the next 6 lines to provide a synopsis of the full story (which has been done enough in the second paragraph), and the lines proceeding the synopsis all sort of say the same thing in different words, some of it with zero relevance to Penguindrum's quirkiness and just general vague compliments.
That said, I think saying too much is better than saying too little. It will be less work for you to make your writing concise now that you have all the ideas written. You have great transitions!
This review is outstanding. However, I found three problems.
1. Grammar. So many mistakes. I'd go back and revise like crazy before posting another review. If you'd like me to go more into detail about this, I'll message you your review with every mistake I saw in it.
2. Time. This sentence: "Take, for example, the relatively recent shootings in Newtown, Connecticut."
- That's not going to be "relatively recent" in a year, is it? I hope you're willing to go back and edit that sentence whenever the time comes when it is no longer "relatively recent." That's the thing with statements involving time; time changes. Always. Your sentences have to be concrete, never changing.
3. Length. Before I read your review, the first thing that popped into my mind after skimming through it was,
"HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-"
I subsequently put it into word count. 1,954 words. That's a long review. After reading through it, there were a couple instances where I became, er, bored. You tend to go on and on with your explanations when it ultimately isn't needed, especially with your detailed explanations while taking examples from the show. In this case, I'd say, "Tell me less, tell me less, tell me less."
D. Oh, I forgot to mention, there's a fourth thing. Spoilers. When you put giant SPOILER headings in your review, that scares me. It scares others. It scares them away from your review. It almost scared me away from your review. But I took a chance with it, and I'll say this; there were no spoilers within your review. The only thing that came close was the doctor's motives. Don't just put those up there like that. That gives the reader reason to run away. Just don't put spoilers! It's not impossible. Either that or you can just put minor spoilers in without putting those giant headers there. I wouldn't recommend that, though.
It was a good review. It just had some lingering issues along with it. And that word count... goodness. I'll be sure to look for more of your reviews in the future, and perhaps chat with you at some point within QD. Until then!
I'm going to be reading ~10 novels by summer, and start reviewing again then. It'd probably be a great help for my syntax, vocab, structure, among other stuff.
Thanks. At the very least, I'm thankful the club receives some recognition outside our small circle, so I find the effort still totally worth it. While it would have been great to secure the top review spot (personally, I don't see why it shouldn't; the others aren't bad per say, but not as insightful), I try not to fret over these things like votebombing anymore. Too much stress for nilly. lpf can complain to Kineta for me. :)
@the conclusion: I like the overall idea. As it is now however, it doesn't feel like a solid closer having read the previous sections. While I like that you avoid being redundant, a conclusion allows you to express vaguer/more general things in a poetic and/or interesting way. You can leave room for something viewers to ponder (as you do), summarize the work under a different light, or reaffirm something. But as you do any of the three, it should hold a punch; not necessary a punchline, but something tactful and consistent with the rest of the review. Just adding one or two more sentences in the same light asthe conclusion as is can do all of this (assuming the two sentences are apt).
It is/was more like "someone", as you've said. I honestly don't know how I got so much activity on them, but I can tell you that I have once re-uploaded my reviews because of that reason alone.
Down-vote, and potential up-vote raids were unbearable. Regardless, I won't do that anymore.
Thanks, again, I agree.
I just can't pinpoint which is Sakurasou.