Katakuriko Matsudaira: "Заливаю лин, поцелуи на шее"
Tetsunosuke Sasaki: "Э-эй, капитан блант"
Seizou Kumanaku: "Траблы назад и чёрный каскад"
Shimaru Saitou: "Вижу твой взгляд, степ на Goyard"
Kamotarou Itou: "Мог тебя взять, но ты не моя"
Isaburo Sasaki: "Забери ма, снова летаю"
Nobume Imai: "На пьяном угаре, я словно сияю"
Otose: "Ты восприняла в штыки, а я летаю, я летаю"
Catherine: "Так дайте пацанам не остановится"
Tama: "Без этих драм тут определится"
Shimura Tae: "Много я видел чужие тут лица"
Tokugawa Shige Shige: "Перелистнул эти страницы"
Tokugawa Sada Sada: "Взять бы тебя на деле"
Hitotsubashi Nobu Nobu: "Твои губы в новом монклере"
Oboro: "Траблы ганжи в моём теле"
Utsuro: "Взять бы тебя но без денег"
Rappa Momochi: "Эти понты покупались во рту"
Hinowa: "Твои мозги затупились к утру"
Seita: "Так дайте пацанам посчитать потери"
Tsukuyo: "Суммы нули, погибают на сцене"
Housen: "Снова один прогуляюсь без тени"
Jiraia: "Заливаю лин, поцелуи на шее"
Shouyou Yoshida: "Э-эй, капитан блант"
Kamui: "Траблы назад и чёрный каскад"
Elizabeth: "Вижу твой взгляд, степ на Goyard"
Mutsu: "Мог тебя взять, но ты не моя"
Kankou: "Так дайте пацанам посчитать потери"
Abuto: "Суммы нули, погибают на сцене"
Otsu: "Снова один прогуляюсь без тени"
Takatin: "Заливаю лин, поцелуи на шее"
Gengai Hiraga: "Э-эй, капитан блант"
Tatsuma Sakamoto: "Траблы назад и чёрный каскад"
Jirochou Doromizu: "Вижу твой взгляд, степ на Goyard"
Tokumori Saigou: "Мог тебя взять, но ты не моя"
if u type somethin epix in my coments u may get a chance 2 hav it up here 😎😎😎 (u cant copy da coments already up here sory) 👑SIGMA👑
ALPHA
BETA
(none so far)
Greeting MAL mods,
So, I was having a few days of hot s*x with my wife of 20 years when I decided to have a look into MAL to see if I had sucessfully recruited fellow boomers intectualls on my anime site after my serious annoucement that my b*lls are shrinking, and to my surprise, I received many death threats in the mail even though I was very politely and respectfully telling zoomers they are stupid. You can see them below:
I can't believe I had over 99 death threats, but that's not even the worst part. I then looked into each of these death threats, and the contents were shocking:
Now, one brave soul tried to stop the onslaught of HARASSMENT I was receiving from these zoomers but unfortunately, their efforts were in vain, and they probably became bisexual and twerking like all the other zoomers because they commented once, only to be never seen again. Please pray for him 🙏
Unfortunately, reading these death threats gave me an enormous *rg*sm and I was forced to spl*rge on my computer screen. Some of the j*zz stains sadly seeped into my computer and now my computer won't turn on no matter what I do. So, my question to you MAL mods is: can I get some financial compensation for n*tting?
Hopefully you can answer my question promptly.
Sincerely,
beni--. --. .-
Important announcement (serious) Greetings to the 10 people reading my profile,
I regret to inform you guys that I can no longer be r*tarded (act stupid) on MAL. After getting into detention for screaming out "big chungus" at the Holocaust assembly in high school, I now realize I may get kicked out of my college dorm if I moan out "poggers" and "based" while watching tentacle futanari. If anyone has tips on how to not shit their pants during class, please give me tips. Thanks.
also i checked da comments and some of u thought that im pernanently becomin mature or sum shi jus cuz im goin 2 colege lik nah u can go 2 coleg n be stopid at same time 😎😎😎
As a newly reformed mature intellectual of the MAL site, I will have to set some ground rules moving on:
1. Do NOT make poop, fart, cum, piss, penis, vagina, poop, sex, or edgy jokes. These are NOT funny and extremely IMMATURE. (my kids use this computer be respectful please)
2. Do NOT be a gamer. Gamers are the most vicious, violent, sociopathic people you ever meet in your life! I mean c'mon, who enjoys killing people in a game!?! I'm telling you all gamers will commit crime eventually, and don't forget that how racist they are too! Even gaming companies are racist! Just look at this image here:
The makers of Fortnite, Epic Games, support SEGREGATION! Do you want your kids learning how to racist!? Gaming invented sexism as well!
Here is a wonderful resource down below to understand the hidden gamer language. If you catch a gamer out in the streets, CALL THE POLICE and RUN AWAY IMMEDIATELY!!!
3. Do NOT be an atheist! If God isn't real, then explain this video 😫😫😫🙏🙏🙏
4. Wholesome christian memes only like this meme below, lovely meme to send to the kids! 🤗🤗
5. Do not watch SHOUNEN anime! It is propaganda designed to hypnotize the children! I wil admit though, there is one decent thing in shounens, and that’s the never give up attitude, because I will never give up my dream of running over 100,000 children in my Chrysler Jeep! Believe it! 🙏🙏🙏
6. Do NOT watch SHOUJO. This will turn your kids GAY and make you attracted to men 😭😭😭 I was watching episode 1 of Fruit Baskets with my two male nephews and after one second of the episode they started kissing each other on the LIPS! 😨😨😱😱😱 Every time I see a guy now I start getting violent b*ners and this will happen to you too! If you are not a guy you will grow a c*ck and get a b*ner anyways!! Stay safe! 🙏🙏🙏
7. Must watch 200 SEINEN shows/manga (minimum). Anime is not for fun, and it’s not a joke! If you can’t write a novel based on the deep lore of a single episode/manga panel, it is not DEEP enough! My personal favourite seinen show is Rainbow because it is all about how friends are family and you should never give up and accomplish your dreams, all deep and mature themes shounens don't have the capacity to explore 😂😂😂
8. Do NOT be a zoomer. Zoomers are extremely childish and I simply CANNOT interact with such a childish generation. Unlike you children, I was born out the womb a adult!! I never had a child phase in my entire life 😎😎 Us boomers actually know how to treat restaurant staff and convenience store employees properly unlike you kiddos addicted to yo twerking and bisexualing and charging you phones! This is now an 18+ comment section ONLY.
9. Every comment MUST be 1 paragraph (5 sentences) long at the minimum to indicate you are a mature, dintinguished, and cultured intellectual. My mind needs CONSTANT mental enrichment and stimulation, so childish phrases won't suffice. It's time to jack off my BRAIN, not my MEAT.
10. MUST be political. If I am not engaging in intellectual discussion over whether peepee should be in peepee or poo poo hole I ain’t talking to you period!
11. MUST be knowledgeable on the various arts, histories, sciences, medicines, social studies, mathematics, and literature. I only wish to communicate with those of the same higher level thinking and plane of existence that I am currently am as a mature, old, wise, distinguished, renowned, 18 year old philanthropist billionare playboy (when I was 17 I was poor, uneducated, stupid, immature, childish, and idiot)
12. IF I question your anime or manga scores, you MUST give me a 10 paragraph essay justifying why you gave that particular anime or manga that rating. NO EXCEPTIONS!
13. MUST have 100% affinity on anime and manga and a minimum IQ of 200 (with proof) to send friend requests. NO EXCEPTIONS!
14. If you are not going to the doctor everyday for health-problems, you are not a real one!
15. MUST watch 100 minimum obscure hidden gem 1640s anime shows (Legend of the Galactic Heroes) that zoomers won't touch with a 6 ft. pole because their brain will implode if it is not constantly exposed to 4k 60 fps "sasuga" (5 second animation that took 1600 hrs of slave labor from animators working in sweat-shop factory condtions for 6 cents an hour (pretty "poggers" as the kids say))
16. Old (mature) people and boomers can give me suggestions on how to weed out zoomers from my 𝓹𝓻𝓮𝓶𝓲𝓾𝓶 MAL experience (zoomers suck and I am above them now that I am mature 18 year old with big boy brain babies suck kids suck adults rule!!! (this is mature mindset) (please talk to me fellow boomers I keep seeing zoomers on this site and they keep scaring my kids and grandkids please help me out I'm in grown up table now please)
31. If you don't have arthritis, dementia, schizophrenia, Parkinson's, back problems, and/or heart problems like the rest of the boomer squad then GET OUT!
17. Must have 10 grandkids minimum so we can talk wiping their ass all day!
18. Must win at least ONCE in Bingo Fridays at the care center! No loser gramps in this comment section please.
19. NO ONE is allowed to comment between 2 pm - 2 am EST (this is my afternoon nap time, so don't disturb me because you little kids need to show RESPECT just like I have shown you! #20hoursleepgrind
20. DO NOT use emojis! They were created by the devil! 👹👹
21. MUST Harass 30 customer service employees and/or beat 50 children with a cane per day! #stayonthegrind
22. Facebook memes ONLY. Preferrably minions please. I don't need my brain to melt like the zoomer kids out here!
23. IF the above rules are NOT followed, users will be BANNED from commenting!
24. I hate my grandkids. Any tips on how to legally kill them?
25. Can anyone tell me what this "hen-tie" thing is?
26. -sent from Nokia
27. Smash like if one of your balls disintegrated already 😥😥
In case there is any zoomers kids loitering around in my profile (it is natural for little kids to spy on the adult table here), I have compiled a list of videos below to help you guys become trillionaires in no time. As a former zoomer (because I am now very mature and smart), I know what it's like to be mentally disabled, and I know you all may not get your disability benefits because the government is rigged, so I have compiled a list of videos to help you get CASH QUICK. All you have to do is FOLLOW the sigma male grindset, BUY your problems, and TROLL the working class. Get bullied in school? BUY the school. Owe the bank a lot of money? BUY the bank. Get banned 3 times in MAL? BUY the MAL site. #trillionaregrindset #eatthepoor #eatsleepgrindrepeat #quadrillionairestatus #verywoke #iboughtthebank
I figured since I am the wise adult here i should teach you kiddos how to rate anime properly. If you don't rate anime like this your banned offa my profile!! 😂😂😂
10: الموسم العاشر هنا ، والعالم يزعزع الاستقرار ، بسرعة.
9: ولكن لا تقلق, هذا يعني أن هناك الكثير من طرق جديدة للعب Fortnite!
8: من B. R. U. T. E.-سيارة جديدة 2 لاعب أن حزم بعض قوة النيران الخطرة ، إلى مناطق الصدع الغامضة التي تغير النقاط المهمة المفضلة لديك بطرق غير متوقعة. هذا غريب.
7: الموسم العاشر توفر تجارب جديدة لجميع اللاعبين للاستمتاع.
6: هناك أماكن جديدة لاستكشافها ، وأسرار جديدة لكشفها ، والعالم الذي تلعبه اليوم ، قد لا يكون العالم الذي تلعبه غدا.
5: بالإضافة إلى جميع طرق اللعب الجديدة الموجودة في الموسم العاشر ، هناك أيضا ممر معركة جديد تماما ، والذي سيقدم "أبعادا" جديدة لبعض شخصيات Fortnite المفضلة لديك بطرق لم ترها من قبل.
4: وفي المستوى 100 ، ستفتح Ultima Knight.
3: بالإضافة إلى ذلك ، لا ننسى ، هناك emotes جديدة ، الطائرات الشراعية ، يلتف وأكثر لكسب كما كنت مسبقا من خلال تمرير.
2: Battle Pass متاح الآن ، مقابل 950 V Bucks فقط
1: سنراك داخل اللعبة.
SEND THIS IMAGE TO ALL SUSPECT ZOOMERS!!! IF THEY SAY "C" FOLLOWED BY "U" FOLLOWED BY "M" IN ONE WORD CALL THE POLICE!!!
WARNING: Don't check the stuff below it is zoomer mind control propaganda enslavement!!!! ❗❗❗❗❗
⚠ATTENTION⚠: u may receiv brain expansion 🧠🧠from all da fax n logics i spit, so be careful 🤗🤗🤗
konichiwa mi fellow otakus!!1!! watashi wa beniporag desu an dis is mi animu listo~~~ pls let me kno wat u tink of mi listo in da comints below i am vewy new user!!! ja-nee~~~ ≧◠‿◠≦✌
breed: 𝓭𝓲𝓯𝓯𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓷𝓽 😈 im stuf 😳
race: 𝓲𝓼𝓽 😤 the race dat says n wrod (nagatoro)
home: 𝓅𝒽🌺𝒷𝒾𝒸 🤬 3942 Cockburn Drive, West Chester, PA (lool sum random place)
S3x: ❀𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇 🥶 Never
miss?: 💗𝑔𝓎𝓃𝒾𝓈𝓉 😼 no 😎
DIS IS PIEK FICTION!!! 🤩🤩🤩🤩
OFFICIAL BAN STATS
# of bans: 3
Reason for ban(s): Too much swagga!! 😎😎😎
MOD CHAT LEAKED 🗣🗣🗣🗣❗❗❗❗❗❗😱😱😱😱 (100% real 😳)
da jok is im pretendin 2 be 10 n stuf i dont hate mods i swear! 🤗🤗🤗
STAY SAFE OUT DER GIUYS!!! 😥😥😥😥😫😫😫😨😨😨😨
u must complete dese befo ur 5!!
stay humble! 🙏🙏🙏
neva giv up, u may never kno wen u effort pay off! 🤗🤗🤗
eat natural orgjanic fod (very healthy) 😊
pls invest 🤪🤪🤪
he spittin doe 😫😫😫
dis one rly important 🙏🙏🙏
signam mals r cool af 😎😎😎
make sure 2 die or sumthin idk da mesage of dis shit 🙏🙏🙏
serch it up! 😋😋
dont eva forget dis one, very impartant! 😤😤
mah ballz on da grind!!! 😳😳😳
gomenasai~~ 😳👉👈
f*k u piza man! 😡😡
kentucky fried balls
no all might gona save u form da azz whoppin 😂😂😂
loool imagine doin dis 😅😅
end technalgy today! 🤗🤗🤗
what an interesting fellow, i hope he holds no ill sentiment towards the democratic republic known as China
yuor welcome! 😁😁
oh shiiitttt its da walkin at park arc 🔥🔥🔥🔥
daamn dem squeky rats spittin! 💯💯💯
just found oute wat s*cks is 😎😎😎 (4th grade mfs kno nothin bout da rel world 🤣🤣🤣)
lif is rly touigh guys y dey ad d da leters n maff bruh? 😥😥😥
LOOOOL schol owned!!1!!!!!11! 😆😆😆 finna close up 🤪🤪🤪
we endin cancer tonite 😇😇😇
u "cian-testes" needa quatam mechanize my COCK 🤣🤣🤣 imagin tryna do sciec bruh jus worship allah! 🤪🤪🤪🤪
if u athist isnt a demon, why u h8 jod words so muc??? 🤣🤣🤣🤣
u fe-mils wil neva undestand how dep sasug caracta is (he very dep 😭😭😭😭)
RAP WIL NEVA BE DA SAME!!! 🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯🤧🤧🤕🤕😳🥶🥶🥵😢😲🤑😔😬🤒🤠😈😫😫😫😩😩😩
ayo dis redditor spittin!!! 😱😱😱😱🔥🔥🔥
hey guys where u goin? 😥😥😥 i jus wna maek u mi litle kiten 🐈🐈😋😋 (shan dawsun mome n😱)
get help
nvm 😅😅😅
dam i tink imma s*k mah window 🏠 😍😍😍🥵🥵🥵
dont do it 😥😥😥😥😨😨😨😨😰😰😰😰😭😭😭😭
guiys pls tel me 😭
stop lauigin! 🤬🤬 u woodnt lik me wen im angery 😈😈
lif is so unfair 😭😭😭
mans drippin fo da 1776 continental congress! 🥶🥶🥵🥵
get beter soon! 😁😁
omgg i can becom stev form meicrakft ⛏⛏⚒⚒💎🤩🤩🤩🤩
LOOOOOL i kno u lockayshun 😋😋😋 its earfh stuopod 😂
girlfired takin physucks!?!? 😲😲😲😲 (yes i hav da gf, jus livs in anoter planet 😎)
"plsss guiys i mak rly gud mongatari n mushoku tensei "art" (copious amounts of rule 34) plssss sobscrib 😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏"
omg kazuma n exposion girl wat r u doin??? 😳😳😳
whos next 🤪
murcia bad, litraly livin in 3rd wolrd cojuntry 🤢🤒🤒🤢
do it, i dare u 😎
omfg i hop dis is canon!!!11!! 🥺🥺🥺
da fat rabit kinda smart doe 😳
plss mom i cant slep no mo 😥😥😥
podiepie gamer merch!?!? 😲😲😲
da devil dont kno i hav lvl 100 batlepass 😎😎😎
is drake a gaming youtuber?!?!!? 😱😱😱
yoo petric got da chain! 🤑🤑🤑💰💰👑👑⭐⭐
yooo live adaptation!!! 🔥🔥🔥
lol idot iz blind 😂😂😂
water 💧 be thicc af 🤤🤤
OH SHIEEETTT MRS. SMITH FOUND OUT!!!! 😥😥😥😥😭😭😭😱😱😱😱
givin away free bra!!! 🤗🤗🤗 (form mom's closet 😳) aplicable to all genders 🤭🤭🤭
gamer goku 😎😎
haha dis doesnt apply to me 😅😅😅 (dont check completed 😳)
cmon mom hury up!!! im needa salt up my burga n fries! 🤬🤬🤬🥵🥵🥵 (cuz im maurican 🦅🦅)
spittin fax 😤😤😤
LOL 🤣🤣🤣
Ok, I wont! 🤗🤗🤗
u ever wach skydoesminecraft noob??? 😂😂
"sory sir, i hav a bit of shit stuck to mi leg, sowwy~ 😊😉😊✌"
"sory dad, im jus a litle ✨sussy baka✨ 😋😋"
dam gurl, u blow dat mind gud 😳😳😳🥵🥵
we liv in fortnite-ciety 🤡🤡🤡
i kno wat im decoring mi hous wit 😤😤😤
yooo murica civil war 2!?!?! 😖😖😖😖
wtfff mom!?!? dats my favrit part 😡😡😡😰😰😰
f*k sponjbob!!!! 🤬🤬🤬🤬
seksual ass-alt?!?! 😫😫😫
jay couple OWNED!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤪🤪🤪
hel nah bru im outta here 😫😫😫😖😖😖😪😪
mmm eatn s*sk 😋😋
pogkek champ moment amirite gaymers??? 🤣🤣🤣
he is saying nigerian
pls shar ur WACKY fortni naym in da comits below! 😍😍😍
wat da hel pinachio doin?!!? 😭😭😭😭
spongebob please
its gay to be gay 😎
omg, serbian preisdnet a web!?!? 😮😮😮
dis hors wont look at u doe, unles u giv me money 💰(troled 😎)
my hypothetical real grilfirend into da helicopters!?!? 😳😳😳
NOOOOO WTF I DON WANNA GET GIRL TOYYYYY!!!!! GIR L TOY SUX!!!! 😥😥😥😥😔😔😔😖😖😖😞😞😞😭😭😭😭😷😷😷😷🤢🤢🤢🤒🤒🤒
i want chase mccain 2 kiss me in mouf 😳😳😩😩😩😍😍😘
scinetists cant even answer dis one!!! 🧠🧠🧠
dont eva stop da pooupe flow! 😣😣😣🚽🚽🚽💩💩💩
dem mfs rich! 🤑🤑🤑
SHEEEESH dat baby pushin 🥶🥶🥶🥶🥵🥵🥵
so dep giuys 😞
damn gogole jus let me wach da movie 😡😡😡
their crazy bread is so good tho, u don understand!! 😭😭😭
stop lokin at wall idot 😂😂
u cant take away mi rites 😈😈😈
thank u evryone fo da award, i am aware of how comedic those comints are! 🤗🤗🤗
dont say it 😖😖
cmon jake, we wachin animashun s*ks, not cartton s*ks 🙄🙄🙄
ima seks da fishe on da go! 😋😋😋
dis hw so epic n basedddd guiys 😎😎😎
DA LIBS CONTROLIN DA MEDIA, DONT LISTEN 2 DA LIES!!!! 😤😤
no thanks, i am not fukin poopy 💩🤢🤮
da shrimp 🦐 do be culinary experts 👩🍳 doe 😍😍😍
seriously guiys can we go bac 2 da egytiam hieroglyps??? dis new language sux 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮
sussy bussy gussy 😳
im perfectly fine 🤗
wat if i told u i was both? 😳
this is censorship man 😭😭😭
we neda go bac 2 da caveman days n be nakd all day 😝😝😝
i neva get scared wachin scary movies, cuz i pause it evry 2 seconds 😎😎😎
loool dumbie kids 😂😂😂
thank u good samaritan! 😇😇
watch what u say punks 😎😎😎
sory for trolin ur mom 😥😥😥 (she liked it 😋😋🤗🤗)
i dont hav time for ur games polic 🙄🙄🙄
joe owned!!! 😂😂😂
cmon kyle, get it right 🙄🙄
we liv in a society 😔😔😔
very healht dogger chonk puper boi
it sux so much 😥😥
now im adicted 2 chugnus cereal 😤😤😤
😋
were is his cok n bals doe?
yo joe, help som disabed peple out!!! (i am incapable of s*k 😎😎)
u dumb NPC, im tryna run away form polic get outta da way! 🙄🙄
wat da fak??? washington is a gaymer!?!? 😍😍😍
pls stop includ famil guy funy momen in try not 2 lauig pls i kep failin 😥😥😥😥
u dumb "fill-azz-oficers" stop tryna tink and jus acept we hav no free will 🤣🤣
ben shaprio a discorde kiten!?!?!
loool u r cok smol 🤣🤣🤣 (looks kinda tasty doe 😳😳😳)
i on dat grind!!! 😎😎😎💪💪💪🔥🔥🔥 (dont want paremts 2 beat mah azz 😩😬😬)
i hav achived comedy 😂😂
omgg world peace ahceived 😭😭😭 (u.s da entire world 😎)
*insert minecraf enchantin table jok ova ISIS vidoe* 😝😝😝
yes, i am da discord user 😎😎😎 (if u r actually 13 and under u needa find somethin else to do lik jak of 2 porn ffs 🙄)
obum pls com bac!!! 🙏🙏🙏
squichword a pr0n add*ct??!?! 😱😱😱
furytopia irl 😳
dis is wat biden wants 😥😥😥😥
clic imaj 2 find oute!!!! 🤗🤗🤗
dis is wat da vacin does ur body 😭😭😭😭 (is dis politkol? 😳😳)
All Comments (12299) Comments
He was shot 7 times in Orange county robbing Liquor store by powleece , he fled and survived
he later contracted with Monkey Pox virus he got from his jewish polish boyfriend
and died
I didn't make this shit up believe me